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So you think the sex was so intense...

spinning's picture
Submitted by spinning on Jan 7 - 10AM

***** Greetings to all who land here. It was suggested that the following post I created in September of 2011 be made into a blog. The post was created after discussing the sex issue with a valued member who used to post quite a bit was helping another member who was struggling to understand the "sexual intensity" of the disordered experience. All sorts of lightbulbs clicked when the member offered her observations, and then even more lightbulbs clicked when I shared the observations with our lead moderator Goldie. It is my intention and hope that even more lightbulbs will click for members who read this. You can also access this entire blog and all of the numerous, numerous comments members have left on the 1-3 board. ********

Love (not) spinning, JUST GRINNING!

"Friends With Benefits" crumbs from a Narcissist

Goldie's picture
Submitted by Goldie on Sep 12 - 11AM

The Narcissist's theme song and the Empath's Love Story of HOPE.....
Also a GREAT SONG/theme for the Narcissist's HOOVER, I LOVE you NOW BABY!!!!
Does he? Do Narcissist's love just ONE GIRL? Can a leopard change his spots? Are YOU holding out for this one in a million?

Fooled Around and Fell in Love
Elvin Bishop
Jeffrey Bailey edited the lyrics

I must have been through about a million girls

I love 'em and I leave 'em alone

I didn't care how much they cried, no sir

Their tears left me cold as a stone

But then I fooled around and fell in love

It used to be when I'd see a girl that I like

I'd get out my book and write down her name

But when the grass got a little greener on the other side

I'd just tear out that page

Trust your instincts about the Narcissist in your life. Our instincts are our inner shield for protection and safety from harm's way in our live's

Goldie's picture
Submitted by Goldie on Aug 31 - 4PM

Trust your instincts

Your instincts are your truth.

No, I did not say to trust your addiction.

We cannot trust our addictions, they are not our instincts.

Addictions take us to places of avoidance.

Instincts take us to a place of truth.

Generally when we find ourselves in an addictive state of any nature, food, people, shopping, alcohol, gambling, sex, toxic relationships, and so on, we are in avoidance mode.

Addiction = avoidance of generally pain and truth. Our honest true feelings and what we see.

The truth is too painful so we become addicted to avoid the truth.

Often it is said of addiction, is that the person has on their running shoe's.

And what are they running from?

A Manipulative Narcissist Dream Supply

Goldie's picture
Submitted by Goldie on Aug 10 - 1PM

A Manipulative Narcissist's Dream Target/Man/Woman

Traits a Predator is looking for in YOU: A Narcissist Shopping List.

Arming yourself from the predators which live among us.

I have worked with hundreds of clients now, from all walks of life and have composed typical profile's of the most likely candidates to be selected (targeted) by Narcissists.

Finding the perfect target/supply for a Narcissist is not an easy task. This is why the are always on the lookout for potential new victims. Supply who does not know what they are all about. Fresh clean slates.

Many are great supply in the beginning, yet as they catch on and wise up, they become a drag for the Narcissist. Along with the fact that Narcissists grow easily bored.

The Narcissist Recovery Support Groups on The Path Forward are worth their weight in Gold

Goldie's picture
Submitted by Goldie on Jul 29 - 11AM

The Narcissist Recovery Support Groups on The Path Forward are worth their weight in Gold

The Support Group gives you 12 weeks, 24 hours, of the latest information, education, and recovery techniques available today.

I have years of experience working with survivors of Narcissist trauma, confusion, and abuse. I have worked with hundreds of women and men globally with the one on one, personalized sessions, as well as in the Support Group setting.

I work with all levels of recovery, from a few days out, struggling to get out, to those still suffering months and years out.

Group members range from just beginning to understand, to months out, still struggling with PTSD symptoms, understanding it, and slips with no contact.

When can you feel sure that the Narcissist is gone forever?

Goldie's picture
Submitted by Goldie on Jun 26 - 1PM

We draw people to us

When WE have unfinished business.

It's the nature of the energy and power within us.

Did you ever notice how you run into people or hear from them when you either were thinking of them or have a "need" or desire?

It's the same thing when your time with them is "truly" over. I'm not talking about them being with someone else, I'm talking about you being done.

When we are done with someone, finished to our core, there is no longer a need or desire to draw them to us.

I often will see someone I used to know one last time, I'll run into them and we both realize, there's nothing there, nothing left.

I call those encounters, closure encounters. You know you have come full circle.

Maya Angelou, Rest in Peace, Dear Phenomenal Woman, you touched me and millions of women globally.

Goldie's picture
Submitted by Goldie on May 28 - 11AM

I know she will rest in peace.
She was one of my rocks.
I loved her deeply.
She touched my soul and I know she knew my pain, struggles and confusion.
She was an angel sent by God to ease the suffering of women.
She taught me to stay in the game of life and lose my self pity.
To see the hearts of my sisters and know that there but the grace of God go I.
Her light and wisdom allowed me to become a better person.
Through her words of:

Hope
Grace
Strength
Courage
Truth
Peace
Freedom
Laughter and joy
Reverence of God
Love

Maya Angelou, You will be missed and treasured eternally.

God bless~
Goldie

A big thank you to Oprah Winfrey who introduced us to this phenomenal woman.

Why Detoxing From A Narcissist is Difficult

Goldie's picture
Submitted by Goldie on May 10 - 10AM

When with a Narcissist................

Often in the beginning, we feel special, lucky, chosen. Wow, he wants me and he wants me with such vigor. This must be love. Why else would he act so smitten so fast and "make me feel" like I am the center of his universe?

Once you FEEL this, this all encompassing "love" and attention, it's tough to LET GO of it, even years out, when you know there is much much more to the story of the so called, love of my life encounter.

Meanwhile, once HE has you hooked, he pulls back, he lets his hair down and begins to find fault in the very things about you which he claimed were your endearing traits. He may do this subtlety, it may be overt.

Generally in the preening stage, all he wants is YOU, someone like YOU.

The love bombing by a Narcissist

Goldie's picture
Submitted by Goldie on May 4 - 9AM

The love bombing by a Narcissist

Is our first clue that something is wrong.

"Healthy" people have lives. They don't have time to engage with you around the clock in the beginning.

Yes, many of us mistook the constant attention for love.

It is not. It is fake. A huge red flag. Not healthy. Bad sign. Manipulative. Needy.

I certainly don't have time to engage with someone to that extent either. Unless of course my co dependency and love addiction kicks in and I become obsessed with another and put myself and my needs on hold.

This is how the dance begins. Their manipulation and our fantasy thinking. Us wanting to believe that love means catering to us 24/7

Men know that some women have this need, desire, this fantasy of what love is supposed to look like.

NARCISSIST RECOVERY SUPPORT GROUP with GOLDIE Weekly support group recovering from a Narcissist.

Goldie's picture
Submitted by Goldie on Apr 29 - 2PM

NARCISSIST RECOVERY SUPPORT GROUP with GOLDIE Weekly support group recovering from a Narcissist.

http://www.lisaescott.com/blog/goldie

I have two Support Groups beginning soon to accommodate your schedules.

Great for new comers and old timers. I have all levels of recovery in group.

Wednesday evenings @ 8pm EST.

Tuesday days @ 1 pm EST. Also great for our UK and oversea's members. It's 6pm your time.

http://www.lisaescott.com/blog/goldie

Contact Goldie support@lisaescott.com

You may choose to participate days or evenings. The next available group will meet via secured teleconferencing line.

The sessions are for approx. 2 hours

NARCISSIST RECOVERY SUPPORT GROUP with GOLDIE