empty68's story

going NC...I haven't spoken to him, but I feel I must read his TMs to gauge his mood/whereabouts, etc....I'm afraid of what he'll do if I block his #...I don't want him to resort to other means of getting to me...I changed the locks on my door and if he turns up at my job or anywhere I will call the police...

To return some things I left at his house as he is being kicked out of it in the near future....brought a dozen red roses. He talked and I didn't say a word....He said I've taught him alot in a short space of time and he's realizing how he took me for granted, etc. We have a mutual friend who's daughter passed away recently, he asked if we could attend the funeral together, no strings attached...I said nothing....He asked me if I had anything to say, I said no...He was very calm, seemed genuine...didn't harass or push any further...he didn't stay very long as I had to leave to pick up my daughter....This is so hard...despite everything I still love him but I'm know the deal....

10:13P HAPPY ANNIVERSAY…CUD HAVE HAVE BEEN. 11/29/09 – 9:38A I KNOW U R PISS RIGHT NOW, BUT SO AM I..I WONDER WHAT UR XHUSBAND MENT WHEN HE USETO TELL U “U R COLD” MMM, CUD IT B THAT UR R JUST THIS WAY EVEN B4 HIM? I SPEAK OF ALL U DID FOR ME N TOTALLY FORGETTING, I DID QUITE A BIT FOR U TOO,MEANING, I NEVER GOTTEN ANY CREDIT OF BEEING NOT SUCH A BAD PEARSON AFTER ALL.. ITS ALL ABOUT U BUT THERE IS SOMETHING U R NO ONE CAN DENI ME CREDIT FOR….I’VE ALLWAYS HONESTLY TRULY LOVED U , NO MATTER WHAT. 11/29/09 – 11:03A I KNOW I’M NO LONGER WELCOME BY U, BUT U R ALLWAYS WELCOME BY ME, I AM INVITING U DOWN TODAY xxx N xxxx COMING OVER TO COOK “SO THEY SAY” SO PLZ COME N LETS START WKING ON PUTTING OUR NEW N EXITING RELATIONSHIP TOGATHER N LEVING OUR PAST BEHIND US(URS, OURS N MINE) YES, EASER SAID THAN DONE…. BUT WAY DEEP DOWN U KNOW WE WANT TO. SO SHAKE THOSE NEGATIVE FEELINGS N ATLEAST COME N C IF U FEEL THE VIBES… I KNOW U MISS US, N WE MISS U VERY, VERY BAD… WE SAY WE NEVER LOVE LIKE THIS B 4 THINK,LOVE LIKE THIS IS POWER TO OVERCOME ANYTHING, IF WE DIDN’T LOVE LIKE THIS THEN WE CUDNT.plz come down one more time n c? 11:21a BABE, STAYING MAD IS NOT GOING TO HELP, I KNOW U R READING THEASE TXES…R U COMING? THIS IS NOT JUST ANYONE, THIS “ME” OK, THE LOVE OF UR LIFE,(REMEMBER) START GETTING READY IM PICKING U UP IN 35MINS. C U THEN, LOVE U TOO. 12:12P BABE, R U ALMOST READY? I HAVE TO GET BACK RIGHT AWAY. 12:24P AGAIN, I KNOW UR READING THE TXS, ARNT U TREATING ME LIKE A CHILD NOW? 12:33P GET THE UNLIMITED TX PLAN.CUZ IM NOT GIVING UP. 1:54P REALY NOT FUNNY NIGRO… U MUST LIKE WHEN I BEG… OK IM BEGGING 5:15P BABE, pLZ DON’T MISS OUT, COME NOW N SUPRIZE EVERYONE 8:01P C HOW U PLAY STUBURN N MISS UR OWN BREAKING UP PARTY… N U TALK ABOUT ME. 8:41P IF IT TAKES ME THE REST OF MY LIFE, I WILL MAKE U LOVE ME AGAIN. 10:42P I HAD ABOUT 20 PEOPLE BY ME TODAY IT WAS A BLAST, A COOK CLASH BETWEEN xxx N xxx, IT CUD HAVE BEEN FOR OUR 9TH. HOW LONG R U GONNA SPITE ME FOR? 10:55P IM NOW LOOKING AT THE ALBUM U MADE ME WITH TEARS DRIPPING FROM MY EYES, I FEAR THE MOST IF U KEEP IGNORING ME I MIGHT GIVE UP. 11:07P BABE, HAVE A GOOD NIGHT…WISHING WE WERE MAKING LOVE N SLEEPING TO GATHER RIGHT NOW. 11/30/09 – 10:49A HEY BABE, AFTER LOOKING AT THE ALBUM LASTNIGHT I WAS THINKING, ALL THE STUFF U HAVE AS MEMORYS OF US TOGATHER, INSTEAD OF THROWING THEM AWAY LIKE U DID ME… CUD U AT LEAST LET ME HAVE N KEEP THEM FOR WHAT THEY REALLY STAND FOR, AS THEY MEAN NOTHING TO U, CUZ THE xxx I KNEW N LOVED IS IN THOSE THINGS, NOT U. 2:04P PLZ DON’T BE MAD AT ME FOR TXIN U SO MUCH IT WILL SOON STOP, IM JUST SO USETO TALKING TO U N TELLING U EVERYTHING EVERYDAY. TODAY I START PACKING BOXES WITH… STUFF I ONLY NEEDS,I HAVE TO LEVE EVERYTHING ELS IN THE HOSUE CUZ I HAVE NO WHEAR TO PUT THEM, N WILL SLEEP IN MY CAR FOR NOW, I HOPE IT WILL BENEFIT SOMEONE.. THE LIGHT N EVERYTHING ELS WILL CUT OFF SOON AS I CANT PAY ANYMORE, LOOK AT MY ACCNTS ULL C,DON’T KNOW WHAT 2 DO. MY WHOLE LIKE CAVED IN, IM STARTING TO C WHY… SOME PEOPLE CHOOSE TO END THEIR LIFE, IM NOT TRYING TO MAKE U FEEL SORRY FOR ME CUZ EVEN GETTING BACK TOGATHER WUDNT LET ME STAY AT UR HOUSE, FACE UR… DAUGHTER N FAMILY FOR A VERY LONG TIME R TAKE MONEY FROM U AGAIN, ITS JUST THAT WHEN UR WITH ME ITS NOT SO SAD N I CAN DO ANYTHING… I KNOW U FEEL EMPTY HURT N CONFUSED NOW, SO DO I,HANG IN THERE BABE B TRY TO HAVE A GOOD DAY, CUZ NO MATTER HOW STUPID I AM,I LOVE U IF TXIN U IS ALL I CAN DO NOW, PLZ DON’T TAKE THAT AWAY. GOING NOW TO C WHAT I NEED TO PUT IN THE BXS. I WISH U WERE HELPING ME.PS REENA GOT U A CHRISTMAS GIFT. ALSO I THOUGHT UD LIKE TO KNOW, I STOPPED DRINKING FOR MORE THAN ONE REASONS, IM NEVER GONNA B THAT PERSON AGAIN N I DON’T WANT TO WITHOUT U.TX U LATER, LOVE U. 2:43P O, xxxx START WKIN AT xxxx BAR ON FRI…BABE THEASE R THE THINGS I WUD NORMALLY SAY TO U ON THE PHONE. 3:42P THE CAR FRONT END (WEELS) GOTTEN A LOT WORST N THE CIMPUTER COMPLETELY STOP WKING. I CANT DO ANYTHING ON LINE…HA,HA,WHATS NEXT. JUST BRING IT. xxxx IS GONNA RETURN MY CHRISTMAS GIFT SO SHE CAN HELP ME PAY A BILL…ISNT THAT SAD. 5:14P K, I PACKED OBE BX, I CUD ONLY FOCUS ON THINGS U GOT ME N THINGS THAT REMINDS ME OF U. DRIVE HOME SAFE.

I'm sharing so others can see the craziness..I'm saving them for when I go to see a therapist. I cracked and responded to only one of them... 11/26/09 – 2:34A FWD: PS. HAPPY T.G... NO WAY I CAN LOVE U MORE THAN I DO ...I KNOW I DONT DESERVE IT BUT THANK U VERY, VERY MUCH FOR TALKIING TO ME .. MY ONE N ONLEY..BABE 8:45A GOOD MORNING HAPPY THANKSGIVING, TODAY I GIVE THANKS FOR KNOWING U 10:31A I CALLED MY CLIENT MOLI, THE THERYPIST, DIDN’T GET HER, I LEFT HER A MSG…IN THE MEEN WHILE HELP ME IN ANY WAY U CAN PLZ 2:29P DONE COOKING, IT TASTE WICKED, HAVE NO APPETITE, ILL SAVE SOME TO SHARE WITH U…PLZ SAVE ME SOME OF URS…..LOVE U 4:16P PLZ..PICK ONE NICE THING ABOUT N SAY IT TO UR FAMILY 11/27/09 – 1:30A BABE IN SUCH A SHORT TIME I HAVE SO MUCH DIFFERENT KIND OF LOVE, RESPECT, APROCE N UNDERSTAND TOWARDS U N UR FEELINGS…CANT WAIT TO EXERCISE THEM 11:34A HI, GOOD MORNING 8:57P EVERYONE N MYSELF MISSING U SO MUCH…(BUT)…THINK ABOUT IT, IT ALWAYS TAKES 2 TO TANGO. 11/28/09 – 8:13P I HEARD UR SIDE, NOW THIS IS MINE…I MET U THE WAY U R, I MIGHT HAVE MADE IT WORST,BUT,I ALSO REMEMBER MANY TIMES ASKING U TO TRY N NOT B THAT WAY, INSTED… U CHOOSE N PRACTICE TO BE THIS WAY N HAVE THE NERVE TO BLAME ME NOW. BULL SHIT! I HAVE A PROBLEM THAT HAPPENED 4 TIMES TOO MANY IN 9YEARS, I THOUGH THE POWER THE POWER OF TWO PEOPLES LOVE WAS TO HELP EACHOTHER OVERCOME SUCH PROBLEMS, GUSS NOT…U EVER THINK SOMETIMES THE WAY U R, WHAT U DO N SAY DRIVE ME… DRIVE ME FRGN NUTS N BRING THIS OUT OF ME? I GUSS I SHUD JUST BLAME U FOR THAT THE, U R NO ANGEL N NOT EASY TO DEAL WITH EITHER N U KNOW EXACTLY… WHAT I MEAN…WHAT WE HAVE CREATED TOGATHER IN 9 YEARS, FRIENDS, INVIERMENTS, MEMORIES, FUN,LOVE,SEX ETC..,U SWITCHED IT OFF LIKE A LIGHT BULB N THREW… THAT N ME AWAY LIKE GARBAGE. U INSULTED ME BAD WHEN U SAID NEVER TO CALL UR DAUGHTER PHONE AGAIN AS IF I WAS SOME STRANGER R DANGER TO HER,I THOUGHT THAT WAS.. ONE OF THE REASONS I HAD HER NUMBER? IF I KNOW U WELL, UVE TAKEN OUR PIC OFF UR LIVING ROOM WALL N WIPE THE MIRROW IN UR BEDROOM CLEAN B4 ANYONE GOT THERE… CUZ U PANTED THIS PIC OF ME TO UR FAMILY THAT U CANT TAKE BACK N AS LONG AS LIFE LAST THEY’LL NEVER THINK DIFFERENT.DID U TELL THEM HOW U R? MY FAMILY LOVE… N ADORE U. I WUDNT LET THEM THINK OTHERWISE NO MATTER WHAT. IF I WASNT CONTROLLING CAN U IMAGINE HOW U WUD DECIEVE N TWIST ME ROUND UR FINGER LIKE N IDIOT BY… NOW JUST LIKE UR SISTERS DO THEIR MAN IN THEIR PERFECT RELATIONSHIPS. I GUSS ITS OK WHEN U GUYS R THE CONTROLER, REMEMBER THIS WHEN U FIND SUCH A MAN U WILL… LEVE OR CHEAT ON HIM WITH A MAN LIKE ME, I KNOW U. I KNOW U PLANED THIS CUZ U LEFT NO CLOTHES AT MY HOUSE, U DID THIS WHEN I NEEDED U THE MOST, THANKS A LOT… I BEGGED LIKE A DOG N FELT AFTER SO LESS OF A MAN, I WUD RATHER DIE THAN STOOP TO THAT LEVEL AGAIN…I WILL NEVER AGAIN PUT MY HANDS ON U R ANY OTHER WOMAN… I WILL ALWAYS LOVE N MISS U, IF U EVER HAVE A CHANGE OF HEART N WANT TO CONTINUE ON WITH ME, B 4 U EVEN GO ON A LUNCH DATES WITH A “GOOD LISTENER” I DON’T… KNOW WHERE I MIGHT LIVE, IF ANYWHERE, U KNOW MY NUMBER FELL FREE TO CALL, IF NOT TAKE CARE N GOOD LUCK. TRY NOT TO HATE ME SO MUCH… CUZ HONESTLY UR R THE ONLY ONE WHO DO… UNLIKE U, I WILL TREASURE OUR MEMORIES…GOOD BYE….(*BAB*)…ps.I WILL CALL NO ONE ELSE BY THE NAME,BABE.

Said "hope ur happy now, good luck with who you've met, I'm sure he's a very good "listener" (this is something he's dragging up from my past)..thank u very much for everything you've done for me...IOU $3350 ASAP.....take care, u'll find happiness, u've chgd me in many ways, thanks..I will always love n deeply miss u...(*Babe*)." I sent a msg back saying "if assuming I have another man makes it easier for you to deal with this, knock urself out".. He replied.."honestly, it makes it harder..but it don't get more honest than swearing to God"... I didn't respond any further....