The Mod Squad Blog

So you think the sex was so intense...

***** Greetings to all who land here. It was suggested that the following post I created in September of 2011 be made into a blog. The post was created after discussing the sex issue with a valued member who used to post quite a bit was helping another member who was struggling to understand the "sexual intensity" of the disordered experience. All sorts of lightbulbs clicked when the member offered her observations, and then even more lightbulbs clicked when I shared the observations with our lead moderator Goldie. It is my intention and hope that even more lightbulbs will click for members who read this. You can also access this entire blog and all of the numerous, numerous comments members have left on the 1-3 board. ********

Love (not) spinning, JUST GRINNING!

Reality check: The clock keeps ticking

A very good friend of mine passed away yesterday.

She was not ill, not battling a devastating disease.

No. Less than two weeks ago when she was leaving her job at the library she tripped and fell. Her hands were full with book bags--no surprise, she was curious about everything--so she was unable to do much to cushion her fall. She feel forward, on her face. Suffered a broken nose, broken jaw and more injuries I cannot even think about.

Her husband was waiting in their vehicle outside. As always, he was picking her up from work. The entire thing took seconds to unfold, and he saw all of it.

This is how it ends...

#1 "Good morning. Thank you for the pleasant evening. I hope your journey is not too stressful. I am sorry that we have had such problems...

#2 "And I am also sad that you do not want me physically. I understand this. Why would you? I am no longer interesting or cute (in any way) or...

#3 "Anything at all like Timothy Treadwell or Christopher McCandless. My youth and my mystery once held has departed. Now I am just another old, dumb...

#4 "rink rat who was an idiot cop. Oh well. Geez, now I don't want to have sex with me! Anyway, we have had some really fun times. I think so anyway...

#5 "I cannot be in a relationship with someone who does not want to make love with me. It has been an honour and a privilege. May your Gods be with you and...

#6 "and your tribe. Au revoir."

Digging out the root...the real beginning

When I first discover that the root issues, the real reason I’m feeling so lost and bereft, so wounded and abandoned have nothing to do with The Destroyer, it’s a bit liberating. I had given him so much power in my life for so very long.

I’m still confused, though. He’d just given me the silent treatment for 12 days and I did not chase. That is new for me. I’d been reading The Path Forward forum for months, so not chasing, calling, texting, begging, apologizing, changes the script. I think I am finally done. So when he texts to plead to meet for dinner and talk, I am surprised. And override my screaming gut and say yes. I feel a twinge of guilt and stupidity, mixed with weakness and doubt.

Progress...will I ever heal? Guest blog by Done Sourcing

Progress along the path isn’t linear, as Journey says. And sometimes it’s frustrating that after months have passed, recovery isn’t yet complete. It’s a different timeline for everyone, but milestones reveal themselves along that way. Longtime member Done Sourcing recently shared his experience with a member who was questioning the timeline at the 16 month mark. The honesty, accuracy, inspiration and most importantly insight is so valuable I’m compelled to share it as a blog. Thank you DS for your honesty and for helping others on the path.


Guest Blog by Janie 53 ~ I Am an Ordinary Middle Aged Woman ~ The Other Woman

~ I Am an Ordinary Middle Aged Woman ~ The Other Woman
Posted June 5, 2013 - 11:43am
Vote up!
I love this .. So I resurfaced it!! Thank you Janie

~ I Am an Ordinary Middle Aged Woman ~
The Other Woman

I have dark brown hair with auburn highlights that I add to disguise both the inevitable and uninvited gray. My eyes are brown with a few specks of green. They are outlined with crows feet and small wrinkles; a result of too much sun and a lot of life. I have a very small gap between my front teeth. My days of going without a bra are long gone. I lost that battle to nursing my babies and the laws of gravity. I'm somewhat athletic and have been told I have nice legs. (At least I used to) I think I'm an ordinary middle aged woman.

Lessons from nature...Predator and prey

“...Man is the only animal for whom his own existence is a problem which he has to solve....”
--Erich Fromm

I’m sitting on my deck watching my newly grouped up ducks peck around the yard. The big, white pekins are gentle; creatures of habit and routine. They listen to my commands, mostly because I’m in charge of the food, but they are perfectly fine on their own, and don’t like to be handled. That’s okay. They are ducks. They are meant to peck around, swim, preen, sleep, and peck around, swim, preen and sleep some more. This is their life. They are happy—that is if ducks can be “happy.” Content, may be the better word. They have their life, they know who they are.



1. a principle or regulation governing conduct, action, procedure, arrangement, etc.: the rules of chess.

We all must follow "RULES"

This forum has rules..

The Government has "LAWS"

We all know what happens if we don't perform at the office !

Even a child's board game has rules!!


We as individuals must set our own life "RULES" here we call them boundries!!
When rules are broken consequences are suffered!!

On This forum we block members who refuse to follow our guidelines, we remove the bad apples!

Something as small as driving thru a red llight, results in a court date and an expensive bill for the violation !

Board games result in an loss and a hurt ego!!

Lance Armstrong and the Real 'F' Word...

"I did call her crazy. And I think she'd be OK with me saying this. I'm going to take the liberty to say it. I said, 'Listen, I called you crazy, I called you a b*&%$, I called you all these things, but I never called you fat.' She thought I said (she was) a fat crazy b*&%$. I never said (she was) fat."

This interesting piece of dialogue keeps running through my head like a bad Justin Bieber song...(wait, are there any good Justin Bieber songs?)...

...Okay. Focus here. Don't make it worse.

The above paragraph is a direct quote from Lance Armstrong in response to a question by Oprah in part one of the highly anticipated and very telling interview with the fallen cycling star.

Getting off the Endangered Species List

“It is the darkness that makes the light visible, and not the other way around.”
--Nancy Venable Raine

I don’t like all this “becoming.” Six years of becoming someone I don’t recognize. But of all the things I have “become,” I am at the do-or-die transformation now. Being Pain Queen doesn’t work any more. Pain Queen is on her last leg. And she just can’t take any more pain. So I must become a person who does not desire it. Who doesn’t seek it. Doesn’t turn to it. Doesn’t count on it. Doesn’t accept it as a permanent affliction.

I must become a person who does not love HIM. Who couldn’t possibly love a man who has brought me so much pain. I must stop thinking I love him. It’s just too twisted to “love” the source of my pain...

Going to chapel and we're going to get married

Marriage... As they say planning for the wedding is the easy part.. It's the challenges of two people who love each other as a couple " FOR BETTER OR WORSE".

And believe you me some days are worse then better..

Marriage is the respect that two people have for one another.. It's all about give and take.. BALANCE..

Now throw in life " life is like a box of chocolates " jobs, family, finances , health.. You get out what you put in...

We are born innocent, a blank slate.. As we grow we face life..( I think that's why vacations are necessary) GOOD VS EVIL..a loving partner is well worth facing life..

One must understand the grim reaper is walking the earth.. The forbidden fruit.. Or we can simply call him "THE NARCISSIST" ( I call him the Dog Whisperer )