Any tips for dealing with anger...

I started running. I'd always wanted to, but never thought I'd be capable. I was overweight, but strong, and never very athletic. I learned of a program called Couch to 5k (C25k), downloaded the podcasts, put some killer music on my iPod - songs that empowered me. And I learned to run. I followed the program religiously and was hellbent on completing it. It was scary in a way. But with every step, I was getting further away from him, the whole situation, and closer to the person I was going to become. Every step was ON HIS FACE! I've been running since February. I ran the Race for the Cure 5k in May. Until I started this, I never thought I could have run 3 miles! And, honestly, I'm not sure I could have if I wasn't that MAD!!! I'm still not that fast, but I'm committed to keep at it and get better. I think I would have imploded if I didn't have it as a means to cope and something to actively work on that made me feel GREAT! I still have weight to lose, but feel a million times better and that has helped to heal the damage inside as well. I wish you the best on finding your way. really

And I love me some wine! But liquor is a depressant - maybe not the thing to do it will take you down. Maybe a glass but under the circumstances you'll have one then say F it! AND DOWN you'll go! - trust me on that one. Anger is energy - so many here have suggested something physical to burn it up. The other thing that worked for me was coming to this board and just ranting in all of its insanity.... Should make for some comical reading...I know I was two loops shy of a fruit loop during that stage... Whatever you decide - ride the wave - it will pass. Good luck and we're all here and rooting for you.

Get a bottle of wine and find a girlfriend to vent to. If your friends are tired of listening, I like wine a lot. Im also getting good at listening to the whine. :) I will be ok!

I'm feeling the same intense anger right now. I don't know what to do with the energy I have either but the anger has helped me to return his Christmas items and take my son to lego land last weekend. Otherwise, I would be in bed crying like all the other times. Anger is keeping me going right now and as much as it bothers me to be so mad I'm thankful in a way. If he showed up at the door right now I wouldn't answer. I hate his guts. Everything is washing over me as well. All the crap he's pulled over the past couple years. Everything I have endured is making me so angry. I guess embrace it for now and maybe it's doing the same for you as me. It's keeping me far far away from him. I don't want to hear his ugly voice or see his ugly mug ever again! I am a very kind and giving person and he took advantage and I'm going to learn from this experience if it kills me. I'm going to learn to be more cautious and maybe not put myself out there like I have. Maybe I won't be as giving or as nice. I don't know right now but at the moment I hate men! 8-) Big Hugs and enjoy your anger! I am embracing mine! Happy1

Now I don't know if you are spiritual or religious..but directing your intense energy of anger to God in a form of aking for help can improve your happy days rather than Anger them. Take the inititive and look up a good prayer qoute online to follow you through this anger obsticle..ask God for forgiviness and to forgive those who do not know what they do. Ak the Lord to forgive your brother the N and those who support his ways may that be the Mother.. OW ..whomever.. Most of all ask the Lord to release this anger from your soul ad your heart..and to stop the pain in your gut.. Release all this negative energy by eating right excersising..being around children.. babies..and pray.. Ask God to BRing peace in your soul "In the fiery pit lays a man with two faces.One is the face of a God and the other a face of the Devil.Beware He lurks your souls.Keep one hand on your heart and the other hand over your eyes. Let him walk pass you not into you.Ghost of love will possess you"

Exercise is the only way i could get it out of my system , I would make my self every morning to ride my bike and i would swim for england back and forth back and forth . I would rant a lot in my head it drove me nuts so i know how you feel , i can say it is a stage and like all the stages it goes after a while , its a pretty scary time , i made the mistake of bumping in to him on a night out and i let rip at him ..oh my ... it was mid anger stage and i went for it , i think if i had a gun he wouldnt have been here anymore !The trouble was what he said to me that night just made me even more angry so to break nc to ball him out is not recomended , not that i think you will you sound quite sound :) There is no way to avoid anger it is a stage of grief and one that is very necessary xxx

It sounds to me like you aren't directing this anger at yourself. That the anger is firmly aimed at HIM, where it should be. IOW, I don't see (in your posts) that your aim is wavering between him and you. It's on HIM. In a way, the anger has to let YOU go. In a way, the anger is like a "god". It is your friend, not your enemy. And maybe there really IS something for you to "do". There is a lot of tension in this anger, and for most women in our culture, this kind of anger is not a walk in the park. But it is so appropriate. The anger toward him is so right, you know? So, DO something. I lived on a farm at the time of my most massive anger and dug two very deep holes in the yard. I actually hit ground water lol. I was gonna bury him in them, after my Great Pyrenees dog ate most of him. He's kind of a big guy. It will let YOU go, when it accomplishes what it must accomplish inside you. This is a healing anger, Spinning. You aren't crazy for wishing it would go away. I come at patients all the time with what will heal them (chemotherapy) and they simply dread it. It's OK to dread this, but it's important to develop a relationship with this healing anger. Where you recognize it's importance and inherent goodness. That said, I doubt you will aim this at yourself if you OPENLY, and DELIBERATELY DO something with it. If you do not take the bull by the horns, your chances of it getting expressed in unhealthy ways is probably increased. Life is very messy, and I'm making this sound cut and dried to a degree it is not. But I know I'm "right" :D . I'm more comfortable with my anger, compared to my previous life before the healing. Not exactly thrilled at it's presence, but I respect it. The anger is my friend, not my foe. Just looking at it in this way is helpful, rather than dreading it and wishing it would go away.