I feel like I'm watching us together now
I feel like I'm watching us together now
I wrote Happy1 off the board about this, but I wanted to write here too. I decided the other day that since it's so impossible to avoid him I would try pretending everything is ok until I can move. Just decided I wasn't going to get upset, wasn't going to ask him any questions, wasn't going to complain. I also only respond now when he texts and let him have the last text as well, trying to just concentrate on my own stuff.
Well, he asked to come by last night and I said, okay, but my daughters are home so just for a drink. He agreed, amazingly. Well, I actually talked about a few things in my life, that he had little comment on of course: my new book coming out, a lecture I did last night, plans for the weekend. Then the conversation came around to I don't know , but he ended up saying, "I'm actually very simple, honey, but nobody can figure me out. One of the things I want is to do my work during the week and then have a nice relaxing Sunday dinner at home, not running around all over the place. and there are three other things."
Well, unbelieveably I kept my cool and my deal with myself to not get upset. First of all, don't you love the "Quiz Show" type way that he said this. He may as well have said, "No woman has figured me out yet. I was hoping you would so you would get the prize, but nope! Keep trying!"
Second of all, we HAD that before his foster child came. We had all that stuff: the Sunday dinners at home (my home), talking and supporting through the week about our work, and I'm pretty sure the other three things were things we had or planned together. I'm betting one was a Narc, Jr., which I was going to have for him, but I miscarried after I found out he was cheating and went into hysterics and atttacked him for an hour ( he told me to abort it, anyway).
For Christ's sake, he doesn't even have a table in the new house! They have never cooked in the kitchen, and he's been there six months! We planned to put a dining room in the big front room, but it's empty. There are two stools at his kitchen island: one for him and one for the child. The times we talked about Sunday dinners there, Thanksgiving and Christmas with our families all there!
So he leaves me with this: "well, just a dream I had, honey, but I'm sure I'll forget about it in a few years, just like everything else. Ha. ha."
WTF? So you are going to forget about your dream because it's unattainable? Why? Because I failed at it? Because you decided I didn't fit the picture of it? Are you deciding to give it up because you don't want the dream with me but don't want to give up sex with me? Bottom line answer: helldweller, this dream does not include you.
And what am I supposed to do? Say to myself, "Well, helldweller, you failed and aren't going to have what you want: a husband and home and family together. Better luck in the next life; be happy he's still with you"????????????
Thank you everyone!
helldweller
Yippee helldweller!
Crazy-making
I truly feel for you
Oh dear
Get the new place to live
only one way to go...Forward (tm?)
Got to agree with everyone.
Nevergoback
Betty2020
"52-year old wrinkled,
only one way to go...Forward (tm?)
Sounds a lot like mine
Amy
Helldweller
Lisa
Helldweller
it's the proximity. i could
almostlydia
Its true
How could anyone love an EGO
only one way to go...Forward (tm?)