Advice needed

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#1 Jun 22 - 2PM
indenial
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Advice needed

Recently I contacted his ex wife in a moment of desperation when he was threatening me and my children. I was in a blind panic and had called the police and I called her and said I'm asking you as a mother can't you speak to him as the mother of his son and make him stop for the sake of my children and she said to me " what do you want me to do ? He's not my problem anymore we are getting a divorce I'm getting on with my life " she then went on to say " he doesn't leave me alone ". Both positive things really in the respect it gave me hope that if she can do it so can I and that by telling me that after 3 years of separation from her he still doesn't leave her alone proof that he is a psychopath and a liar and is betraying me so more reasons to get out ( as if there wasn't enough already).

But what she also said was " you took all my hopes and dreams away". To which I replied I didn't men to do that you were separated can't you see that he took your hopes and dreams away by being a liar and a cheat. What I keep getting stuck thinking though is that if she is saying I took her hopes and dreams away then doesn't she get it and am I wrong ? Is it me that made him this way and he didn't treat her this way ? Surely by now she would have realised that no one took her hopes and dreams away but him and after 12 years with h how could she have hopes and dreams ? I lost mine after the first year

I know I shouldn't be even thinking like this but it's making me spin and doubt myself. I didn't have an affair he was separated and she is clearly recovering and moving on so if she says that I took her hopes and dreams away is she still in denial or did he never treat her badly ? I just want these doubts to stop. Can anyone give me any words that can help me get my head straight ?

Jun 23 - 4PM
Janie53
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Indenial

Jun 23 - 7AM
onwithmylife
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indenial

Jun 22 - 6PM
Movingforwardnow
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indenial

Jun 22 - 6PM
matahari
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Like Hunter said please have

Jun 22 - 5PM
herlatestvictim
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Have empathy for her and forgiveness for yourself

Jun 22 - 5PM (Reply to #17)
indenial
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No it's not harsh

Jun 22 - 4PM
abreva
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I often think what I

Jun 22 - 5PM (Reply to #15)
indenial
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Does he still bother you

Jun 22 - 3PM
Hunter
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You need to kick it up a

Jun 22 - 6PM (Reply to #13)
LoserFree
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Hunter I totally agree with

Jun 22 - 3PM (Reply to #7)
indenial
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I had a one to one with goldie

Jun 22 - 4PM (Reply to #9)
Deidre99
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You may be one of those

Jun 22 - 4PM (Reply to #10)
indenial
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That's why I no longer trust myself

Jun 22 - 4PM (Reply to #11)
Deidre99
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it's hard, i know. basically,

Jun 22 - 4PM (Reply to #12)
indenial
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Deirdre

Jun 22 - 4PM (Reply to #8)
Hunter
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Ugh!! Then keep trying .. A

Jun 22 - 3PM
Portia
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Hopes and Dreams

Jun 22 - 3PM
indenial
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I'm really hopeless aren't I ?

Jun 22 - 3PM
Deidre99
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Simply put, you should never

Jun 22 - 4PM (Reply to #3)
indenial
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Thankyou

Jun 22 - 3PM
Hunter
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CONTACT = PAIN!!