Putting this out there....

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#1 Apr 11 - 6AM
bgirl
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Putting this out there....

I feel so incredibly sad tonight....really, really sad.

I've been thinking about the advice from so many gorgeous women on here...that it is ok to speak your truth...it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks...so here goes.

My husband and children are watching tv together. Tonight I can't even sit with them. I have to force myself to be part of that picture and tonight it has gotten the best of me....

I told my husband I was in love with someone else.

The someone else turned out to be a psychopath.

The psychopath pursued me, seduced me, destroyed me.

I've been NC for 14 months. I have been in therapy for this entire time...sometimes 3 times per week.

When I posted my story here I titled it ' He has destroyed me....don't think I am strong enough to recover.'

And you know what....I don't think I am.

So for all individuals seeking karma on the OW. I was the OW....and I truly don't think I'll make this. I wonder if this symbolize what many of you are hoping for in each of your scenarios.....

I was honest with everyone but the facts remain don't they?

The woman is always blamed. The man is forgiven or excused.
The woman is a slut. The man is just weak.
The woman is forever condemned. The man given chance after chance after chance.

Going back to my old life, or not giving my husband transparency to make future life choices for himself was never my option.

I truly loved M.
I didn't know it was a game.
I am not an intellectual idiot or a 'ho' but I am an emotionally starved, abused individual who was absolutely craving love, affection and the chance to be myself and be accepted.

It is very hard to accept yourself when the world is filled with hypocrisy, judgement and vilification.
It just is.

So I really don't know if I'm strong enough. No pity play. This is my truth and I'm entitled to it.

I hope this helps someone else struggling....because you are not alone xxx

X
B

Apr 22 - 9PM
fallingfoward
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Ahhhh bgirl....

Apr 22 - 9PM (Reply to #25)
bgirl
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Thank u beautiful

Apr 22 - 5PM
mirrorshaker
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just seeing this

Apr 12 - 1AM
Journey
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Sending out a big virtual hug

Journey on...

Apr 11 - 9PM
Lookonthesunnyside
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Bgirl Im so sorry you're

Apr 11 - 8PM
Renegade
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I want to be YOU

Apr 11 - 8PM (Reply to #20)
bgirl
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Nooooooo! Lol XxxxxxxxxxX B

Apr 11 - 7PM
Deestarr
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Positive thoughts

Apr 11 - 11AM
Goldie
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My dear Bgirl

Apr 11 - 7PM (Reply to #11)
bgirl
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Thank you very very much to

Apr 12 - 12AM (Reply to #15)
bgirl
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PS: New You are

Apr 12 - 1AM (Reply to #16)
phantom adoration
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The adult in your life

Apr 12 - 1AM (Reply to #17)
bgirl
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Love you Phantom...like your

Apr 11 - 8PM (Reply to #12)
phantom adoration
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Hey there

Apr 11 - 8PM (Reply to #13)
bgirl
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Thank you so much...I'm

Apr 11 - 9PM (Reply to #14)
Janie53
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Bg

Apr 11 - 10AM
midnight7
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Dear bgirl, perception is all

Apr 11 - 9AM
Armed
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Ive never blamed the OW in

Apr 11 - 9AM
MrsD3
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Not that my two cents

Apr 11 - 8AM
phantom adoration
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OW

Apr 11 - 7AM
patricia barely...
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Hey sweetie...I love that

Apr 11 - 7AM
Used
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bgirl

Apr 11 - 7AM
neverlookback
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I think you should ask yourself

Apr 11 - 7AM
Sparrow
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Accepting yourself is hard.

Apr 11 - 7AM
Janie53
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BGirl