The Path Forward Virtual Retreat Febuary 2021!



Weird things your narc did....Chime in!

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Jun 28 - 6AM (Reply to #28)
Hunter
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mystwoman

HAHAHAHA!
Jun 27 - 7PM (Reply to #27)
lisalisa47
lisalisa47's picture

LOL

I LOVE that story...Good for you for sticking to your guns while with him. I only wish I had been more forthcoming about sticking to mine...

LML

Jun 27 - 3PM (Reply to #26)
Erali
Erali's picture

Oh. My. God.

Oh. My. God.
Jun 27 - 1AM
Puzzle
Puzzle's picture

Great post, I have so many.

Great post, I have so many. I laughed at your and Erali I have a similar one to you. When I met my N he had booked a trip overseas solo, we kept in touch and he came back 3 months later and called me that day to go out on a date. He told me he was going to work in London as soon as possible and that I should come, I said I would think about it. I told him I wanted to go and for about 4 months he never mentioned it again. I went on facebook one day and he had finally accepted my friends request. Some girls he used to live with had written "Can't wait to see you in 2 weeks" I was floored. He had booked his ticket and not told me. I confronted him and he made up some shit about frequent flyer points. We had been dating for about 6 months at this stage and were bf and gf. He then sent me an email telling me that we could go as friends, but not do everything together and not live together and maybe travel some places together MAYBE. I was gutted. So I said seeya later, booked a ticket overseas, booked a trip to October fest, 3 weeks in spain, croatia etc.....I told him and he said "I want to go with you, I thought we would plan some stuff together..." What a fruit cake!
Jun 27 - 3PM (Reply to #24)
Erali
Erali's picture

Yep, this is very similar to

Yep, this is very similar to my story. F'ing hell. I have no problems traveling alone, but when you're invited by who you think is your boyfriend, then they say, maybe we can hang out once in a while when we're both there? That's mental.
Jun 26 - 11PM
IncognitoBurrito
IncognitoBurrito's picture

Odd? Well...

He'd mail me second-hand things as gifts. Nobody's ever done that to me before. Once, it was an old, but really cool, jacket. I got a kick out of it! Sometimes, the items were old, like 5-10 years or more. Always something endearing, something that tied us, via common interests. I didn't mind, I'm as sentimental as anyone. I thought it was sweet, how he could relate to me, so I thought! I took it as a compliment, to have a neat piece of somebody's history in my hands. That doesn't happen everyday. However, I don't remember him ever actually purchasing anything, brand new, and gifting that. He probably couldn't be bothered to buy me something top of the line. That, or I suppose he couldn't afford to. It's fine, everybody's different. It was just a new thing to me.
Jun 26 - 10PM
NeverAgain115
NeverAgain115's picture

OMG - He Truly Did This!!!

Hi all - I can't even begin to tell you what comfort I take from this Board, however, I'm starting to think my narc might win all of the "how bad is your narc" prizes!! It's alright - I'm mostly recovered! In the spirit of the post - I just had to share....my narc showed up at my home (husband and kids inside) and declared the following: "I AM GOD AND U AND NO-ONE ELSE SHOULD FORGET THAT!!!!" I was enraged, but had to keep myself together, as he is the doctor that has truly pulled my youngest son out of the grips of autism - I am trapped and I know it. A mother will take any abuse in order to allow her child a normal existence! I also just lost my high level job on Friday because of him - please help, I know I need to post my story to explain all! Thank you fellow gals/guys!! I need your input!!
Jun 26 - 7PM
onwithmylife
onwithmylife's picture

My EXNARC

said the dumbest things to me, like i was smothering him because i wanted an intimate relationship,tried to leave me whenever things were going really well, tried to talk with him on a deeper level, impossible, treated me like a chair often when i came over to his place, felt like a prostitute without getting paid,sent me real juvenile cards for birthdays, he was like a child who never grew up into a man, so emotionally immature,stood in a crowd for my graduation and looked like a lost little boy, did not know how to mingle at all, the list is endless, had zero social skills
Jun 27 - 5PM (Reply to #20)
Susan32
Susan32's picture

More social awkwardness

When I met the ex-Psych prof's girlfriend at a concert, she&I had a nice conversation. The ex-P didn't bother introducing her to his colleagues. What did he do? Go running down the stairs. His girlfriend, who had moved all the way from Los Angeles to be with him, went running down the stairs when she realized he had abandoned her. In front of everyone. After she left, I calmly told his colleagues, "Mr. T--- didn't tell me he already had a girlfriend." There was a moment of silence.
Jun 26 - 8PM (Reply to #19)
Susan32
Susan32's picture

He didn't need me to humiliate him...

He did it on his own! When I introduced the ex-Psych prof to my mother&sister at graduation, he was AWKWARD, at one point bragging about reading St. Augustine's "Confessions" in the original Latin. Ironically, the ex-P envied my skills in foreign languages. Understanding another's language requires empathy, context, etc. He didn't even get BASIC SLANG. I would LOVE to see the ex-P's father explain "ROFLMAO" and "LMFAO" to him. If he were on MySpace/Facebook, he'd be getting majorly pranked. He was awkward around my friends, his colleagues, he makes my Narc grandmother and my former Narc boss look like socialites/normal people.
Jun 26 - 8PM (Reply to #18)
sunny 523
sunny 523's picture

Mine had very awkward social

Mine had very awkward social skills, too.
Jun 26 - 6PM
Erali
Erali's picture

Traveling

He told me one night that he was going away to Europe, and said that I should go with him. I didn't really jump at the opportunity, but I did think about it, and decided that it was actually feasible. I hadn't been overseas in ages, so I thought it would be fun. I told him I would like to go, the next time I saw him, and he said "Oh, no no no, I didn't mean come WITH me, I meant if you go and I go at the same time and we run into each other maybe we could grab coffee or something."
Jun 26 - 5PM
wisdomneeded
wisdomneeded's picture

Great Topic...

OK! My daughter was involved with the Narc for 3 months when it was Christmas time. She was quite excited that they would be able to spend quality time with each other. The Narc told her he could see her at 6AM on Christmas Eve, but could not see her later that evning...when she inquired why he said that he had "to be home in bed by 10pm for his SANTA PRESENTS". My daughter thought she had heard wrong and asked him to repeat what he said....yep she heard it right the first time. Realizing he was DEAD SERIOUS ABOUT SANTA PRESENTS (he is an 18 year old freshman in college) she bust out laughing. We all know the end of this one...he became enraged and gave her the finger for laughing at him. Yes, it was a wonderful holiday season. His mother blasted my daughter on FB because ALL OF HER FORMER TRADITIONS WERE BEING RUINED. HE IS 18 YEARS OLD....................almost 19 in 2 weeks. My daughter should have ran then....but nope had to go one more time around the mountain..........until the final D&D thanks for the great topic :)
Jun 26 - 5PM
lisalisa47
lisalisa47's picture

Here's one of the WEIRDEST

but now that i think about it, I think ALL Narc's weird behavior is a simple precurser to their always sabotaging anything good or normal in their lives. When we moved to the "skankiest area in the city" cuz that was the only place i could find that welcomed our pittbull, he INSISTED that we load up everything we owned in the dead of night, under a huge tarp, so we could move it in without our neighbors (suspicious looking characters to say the least) knowing what we had. Made sense to me! Not one week later, he was inviting those VERY people in to our houses so he could show off the very stuff he "wanted to protect" from them in the first place. Ironic how some of those people ended up stealing much of it when he was arrested and I split....

LML

Jun 26 - 12AM
prettypeeved
prettypeeved's picture

He would march off and I

He would march off and I would be expected to follow, like a dog on a lead. I was constantly running to keep up. One time I didn't see where he went, he just suddenly disappeared so I walked off in the direction I thought he'd gone and he had to come fetch me!
Jun 26 - 5PM (Reply to #13)
lisalisa47
lisalisa47's picture

Hey I also have a boss like this...(NARC? probably)

and it was in his honor that i coined the phrase... Hey, I'm psychopathic, not telepathic...(so don't expect me to read your mind LOL)

LML

Jun 26 - 12AM
Littleone
Littleone's picture

On a rainy day he spent half

On a rainy day he spent half an hour with a mate driving around through puddles to splash people on the side of the road. He claims he was chasing down an old lady with a walker and also a mother pushing a pram. Sick and demented
Jul 27 - 8AM (Reply to #11)
Better than ever
Better than ever's picture

LOL.....that reminds me of

LOL.....that reminds me of one my exNarc did!!! He would ride around on his bike after the rain just to splash in puddles, like he was 10!!! He is 40.....
Jun 25 - 11PM
Susan32
Susan32's picture

Where to start?

The ex-Psych prof seemed to have forgotten his mask of sanity. -If his fellow professors called him by his first name, he'd give them the silent treatment. -Claimed to be vegetarian, but was caught off-campus eating a burger. Too bad the social media in the '90s wasn't what it is NOW. -Freaked out during the Q&A session after his first lecture, basically telling everyone to GO AWAY. -He's the ONLY teacher who's ever told me about his masturbation habit. -Disliked music with a passion, so to speak. I've never known anyone who couldn't discuss music;he's the ONLY one. My Narc grandmother loves old Broadway musicals;my former Narc boss had a range of interest in music. Talking to the ex-P about music was like trying to talk to a preschooler about non-Euclidean geometry. Probably isn't gonna work. -Was only TRULY happy when my classmates&I played "keep away" with his beret. -He was skittish about his writing being criticized. That's why he barely criticized mine. Then he wonders why he isn't published. There are those people called editors. -Once said in class "I want to be fat." Uh, WTH? -So paranoid that I'd read "War and Peace" my senior class read "Anna Karenina" instead. The intended target was not pissed off (tho that was the intent)... but a lot of my classmates were. -Claimed an interest in Wittgenstein. Would not discuss Wittgenstein. -He compared me to fictional female characters in "War and Peace"-Natasha, Lisa, Helene... rather than ex-wives/ex-girlfriends. -Threw fits if I ended calls with "have a nice day" or "have a happy evening." -Would snap "DON'T HANG UP ON ME!" -Would say in class, over and over, "Can you read that again, WITHOUT EMOTION?" -Couldn't stand seeing me happy. If your N could only tolerate you when you were happy, you were lucky.
Jun 25 - 10PM
sunny 523
sunny 523's picture

I told my ex-n that I loved

I told my ex-n that I loved the actor Liam Neeson. He actually got JEALOUS. He didn't want to see Schindler's List because of that! I actually had to convince him that I would not sleep with Liam Neeson if I ever got the chance! WTF!!!!!
Jul 27 - 5AM (Reply to #8)
Survivor101
Survivor101's picture

Exactly the same

Mind did exactly the same although he was allowed to drool over anyone he wanted to!
Jun 25 - 10PM
lisalisa47
lisalisa47's picture

Well it turns out EVERYTHING he did was weird

but I guess i just didn't notice. But one of the most "telling" things he'd do - first to others, then more often than not, to me - was to text an "accusation" to whomever offended him, then immediately ignore their reply. During our last few months together he pulled the following on me: I finally had a couple of bucks and went to the second hand store to look for a purse, my phone was almost dead so i had it charging in my car. I was only in there for ONE HOUR. When i got back, i noticed I had three texts from him - in ALL CAPS (sign of aggression) wondering "where the fuck i was" "Gee, he thought i might like to go with him to ______(fill in blank) but he guesses now that i didn't even have the courtesy to return his texts. BLAH BLAH BLAH. This shit from a man who started not bothering to call me when he was out - often leaving me waiting for him cuz i had THOUGHT we had dinner plans - whatever. So of course, i immediately called him back - no answer, surprise surprise. So i LIT into him then via texts, i was SO PISSED. I forgot all what i said but i pretty much told him that he would end up losing everyone in his life who gave a shit about him, and would die alone. It didn't matter to me that i knew he wouldn't read those texts for a long time, i knew eventually he would, when he was bored or when playstation was down. When i got home, there he was, sitting in the front seat of our Buick, listening to Biggie Smalls (i'm a rocker, so go figure LOL). We glared at each other then i ignored him and started to unload my stuff. On my last trip to the car, i had to walk past him and he "jumped" at me playfully - we looked at each other and started laughing...Now i realize how BIZARRO my world with him had become. We never brought it up again - i think by that point in my relationship with him, i was too tired to do anything but let everything go...

LML

Jun 25 - 10PM
empath
empath's picture

weird things they did

The N. I was with for 6 years would often go to my office and wait outside...when I wasn't even there. One wintry night back in January, right before I left him...he called me around 7 or so, and I answered to let him know I was in a meeting at a client's house...told him what town I was in, and that I would call him when I finished up. I called him nearly two hours later, when I got home. It had begun snowing, to the extent that you would not want to go out on the roads if you didn't have to. When I called him, he answered on the first ring. When I asked him where he was, he told me he was waiting outside my office. When I asked him why he was there, he said he thought I might stop there on my way home. I had told him what town I was in, he knew my home was definitely much closer than my office and that my office was out of the way, not somewhere I'd stop on my way home, at 9 o'clock on a snowy evening. Weird, weird, weird. And silly me, thought this man must REALLY love me, for him to be sitting outside my office all alone, just in case I might stop there...
Jun 25 - 10PM
tresor2
tresor2's picture

He exposed himself

He exposed himself on the streets of a major Westcoast city. He was intoxicated.
Jun 26 - 1AM (Reply to #2)
lisalisa47
lisalisa47's picture

I just have one question in regards to all these "MEN"

Do any of them have a single twin? LOL LOL LOL

LML

Jun 26 - 3AM (Reply to #3)
prettypeeved
prettypeeved's picture

Do you mean a non-evil twin?

Do you mean a non-evil twin? :-)
Jun 26 - 5PM (Reply to #4)
Redhead1
Redhead1's picture

Shortly after I moved out

Shortly after I moved out after the final D&D, he went out drinking one night. All his friends are much younger. (because no mature adult would hang out with him) Anyways, after the bar shut down they went and bought a slip n slide that you hook up to the water hose and played on it in the front yard. He went in to wake my 18 yr old son and see if he wanted to come join. My son went ballistic on him. The narc was thinking he was so cool, because all his little friends thought he was cool. Here his son was having to play father to his father. They are such morons. I have been with this assclown for over 20 years. There are so many, oh my gosh-did he say that or really do that moments I could write a comic book.