Hopeful36's Story

New story Im married- hes married

Sorry this is long. I tried to shorten it.

I met OM in 2008 at a work event in another state. We both worked at the same company but I was on the West Coast and he was on the East Coast. Our conversation the night we met consisted of him talking about himself. At one point my husband told him that he should go into politics. Should have been a clue.

I was 7 years married to an amazing man.

One year we started corresponding. after about a month I notified him that I was leaving the company and gave him my personal phone numbers if he were ever to visit the West Coast. Immediatly upon that he texted me telling me that he had been attracted to me since the night we met. I was shocked. I actually sent him back a text saying that I think he had mistaken be for someone else. I was 8 yrs older, not in the best shape, he had been married to a very cute girl for only 9 months. And it had been a really longtime since someone hit on me. Haha
As time went on I started to fall pretty hard. Never really had any phone conversations longer than 5 minutes. After about two months he just started ignoring my texts and calls. He told me to stop contacting him because I was crazy. Then I would actually try to contact him because I was so confused to what had happened. I actually started feeling crazy, depressed, and wanted him back so bad. Then a month later he would text me saying he missed me. Or course I accepted him back. This has happened the last 2 1/2 years every 2-3 months.

I have visited him twice. I have always paid for the visits. The last time was 1 month ago. My time with him was amazing. I really felt like this last time we were meant to be together. I feel like I may be in love with him. As time went on I sent him inappropriate pitures and videos that I never even sent my husband.

Here is why I think he is a Narc. He will will be super nice to get what he wants then over-night will stop any contact. Then when I try and contact him he will call me crazy and bi-polar and whatever else. He never tells me personal things unless I ask. He will contact me to tell me how he won and award or he got a new job or whatever he wants to brag about. If I send him good news about me he ignores it. He has also threatened to tell my husband things unless I contact him or at times if I dont.Any time he was mad he'd call and yell and hang up. NEVER letting me talk.

After the last trip he started ignoring me then after about a week ask me for money via email. I thought it was a scam. He then called and said so it was true he needed my help. So I did. $1000. After the deposit he called and said that he is always a jerk because he starts to fall for me so he is mean so that I hate him because we are both married, that we both had too much to lose. He said he wants me in his life and we could talk one or twice a week and meet on occation. We will meet when he has a business trip. Maybe I could find him clients around my area so that he could meet there.

He called me every day for about a week. Then for 2 days said he was busy. I then sent him a text saying that maybe we could meet in Dec in another state where he goes for meeting. He called me and was so mad and said he couldn't plan that far ahead and his meeting may only be for a few hours and he wouldn't take the chance to lie to his wife. He then told me to stop contacting him. He was too busy and stressed with his new job.

I became so anxious. He wouldn't return any texts and so on. I behave in such a strange way. I will send him a messages saying I love him, then hate him, then all of the sudden I appologize to him. I will say really hurtful things to him then take them back. I just wanted so bad to hurt him but I also want to make love to him. It's like I am talking to myself. I have my own conversations.

Now I wonder if its me. But I never have acted this way.

So now he called me yesterday to tell me that he will pay me either Friday or Sat. He doesn't now when he'll make it to the bank. He also said to never contact him again.

I called him back and he wouldn't let me talk. Again he would say you need help, you are crazy, bi-polar, etc...Then click.

The last time he called: yesterday

I sent him a text saying he was a coward and narc and I wanted my money on Friday. He called again but I didnt pick up. He said he wanted to give me a chance to talk to him. I called. We talked and I was sooooooooooo sad. Makes me cry thinking about it. We actually spoke like two normal people. He said he couldnt go on with me because I wanted more than he wanted, that I made him feel like he had to call me every day. That I was getting hurt every time and he didn't want that. We decided it was over and he would text me after he made the deposit.

He then called me right after we hung up and when I answered he said...."I looooove you." It made me smile and made me so happy. He said I knew that would make you smile. He also said that he wanted me to know that he did like me and because of both or our fault and other reasons it never works out. He also said that I did hurt him with some of the things I would say. I told him how I felt. That I was happly married and never look for anyone else. But with him it was different. I don't know why. And so on. I feel like I am so in love with him. We have only seen eachother 3 total days. It's so crazy.

We ended it with him saying if you are ever in (his state) call me or if I ever go to (my state) I'll call you. And then "bye bye."

I don't think he'll ever contact me so maybe he isn't a narc. But I really don't want to give in if he does.

I started see a therapist, one because my husband told me he was unhappy, that I am mean to him and pay no attention to him and second I needed to find out why I was addicted to the OM.