The Mod Squad Blog

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So you think the sex was so intense...

***** Greetings to all who land here. It was suggested that the following post I created in September of 2011 be made into a blog. The post was created after discussing the sex issue with a valued member who used to post quite a bit was helping another member who was struggling to understand the "sexual intensity" of the disordered experience. All sorts of lightbulbs clicked when the member offered her observations, and then even more lightbulbs clicked when I shared the observations with our lead moderator Goldie. It is my intention and hope that even more lightbulbs will click for members who read this. You can also access this entire blog and all of the numerous, numerous comments members have left on the 1-3 board. ********

Love (not) spinning, JUST GRINNING!

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Reality check: The clock keeps ticking

A very good friend of mine passed away yesterday.

She was not ill, not battling a devastating disease.

No. Less than two weeks ago when she was leaving her job at the library she tripped and fell. Her hands were full with book bags--no surprise, she was curious about everything--so she was unable to do much to cushion her fall. She feel forward, on her face. Suffered a broken nose, broken jaw and more injuries I cannot even think about.

Her husband was waiting in their vehicle outside. As always, he was picking her up from work. The entire thing took seconds to unfold, and he saw all of it.

spinning's picture

"You get the help you need the most..."

“You get the help you need the most when you give help...”

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This is how it ends...

#1 "Good morning. Thank you for the pleasant evening. I hope your journey is not too stressful. I am sorry that we have had such problems...

#2 "And I am also sad that you do not want me physically. I understand this. Why would you? I am no longer interesting or cute (in any way) or...

#3 "Anything at all like Timothy Treadwell or Christopher McCandless. My youth and my mystery once held has departed. Now I am just another old, dumb...

#4 "rink rat who was an idiot cop. Oh well. Geez, now I don't want to have sex with me! Anyway, we have had some really fun times. I think so anyway...

#5 "I cannot be in a relationship with someone who does not want to make love with me. It has been an honour and a privilege. May your Gods be with you and...

#6 "and your tribe. Au revoir."

spinning's picture

Digging out the root...the real beginning

When I first discover that the root issues, the real reason I’m feeling so lost and bereft, so wounded and abandoned have nothing to do with The Destroyer, it’s a bit liberating. I had given him so much power in my life for so very long.

I’m still confused, though. He’d just given me the silent treatment for 12 days and I did not chase. That is new for me. I’d been reading The Path Forward forum for months, so not chasing, calling, texting, begging, apologizing, changes the script. I think I am finally done. So when he texts to plead to meet for dinner and talk, I am surprised. And override my screaming gut and say yes. I feel a twinge of guilt and stupidity, mixed with weakness and doubt.

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Progress...will I ever heal? Guest blog by Done Sourcing

Progress along the path isn’t linear, as Journey says. And sometimes it’s frustrating that after months have passed, recovery isn’t yet complete. It’s a different timeline for everyone, but milestones reveal themselves along that way. Longtime member Done Sourcing recently shared his experience with a member who was questioning the timeline at the 16 month mark. The honesty, accuracy, inspiration and most importantly insight is so valuable I’m compelled to share it as a blog. Thank you DS for your honesty and for helping others on the path.

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