I screwed up -- I let my guard down and trusted for a few days
I screwed up -- I let my guard down and trusted for a few days
Barbara, don't kill -- the irony was as all what you read below was happening, I kept thinking of all the emails your wrote -- and I heard this voice in my head that spoke your words, your cautions, your counsel and so on But I kept thinking to myself and foolishly wanting to believe "no, no, he's not a narcissist. He is different. I should never have categorized him like that." LOL LOL and dum dum dum dum !
So, the weekend after our hearing was terrible -- games games games and he had a continued to desire to trap me in things -- not to mention he was in Contempt during the pick up and drop off on Friday last week.
Sunday was a show down -- he tricked me into agreeing to go somewhere under a false premise and I stood my ground and did not go. He then showed up at my house as a desparate father trying to see his child. Sobbing that he just wanted to see his child and he just wanted to be equal.
So here is where I screwed up -- I agreed to let him see her, she didn't want to go, so I asked him to come in an help transition her. He came in -- they played -- she left with him. I called him to find out if she was going to have dinner with him -- he told me she was sleeping the whole time and then he and I starting talking a bit. It was the same old, same old and I let all the blaming bounce off me. I did, however, offer for him to bring her home and have dinner with her in her home and tuck her in as I had been planning to go out to a Superbowl party. I told him the Nanny would be there too and that the nanny's job really was to serve as a watch dog to ensure he didn't do anything he shouldn't have.
So the night went fine, we talked when I came home and agreed to find a solution outside of court -- meaning some kind of program or divorce coaching or something. we talked the next fews days -- had a few fights, worked it out and agreed to continue our course.
The Judge ruled last week that he could still take her to florida and that we were to split the court costs (at least that is what I remember hearing, he remembers hearing it was me who was going to pay everything) -- we were trying to problem solve together.
We had never come to a solution together yet and then he went off and just booked a flight getting our daughter into the airport (our 2 year old) at 10:00 at night getting her home between 11-12 on a work night for me - he did this without any consent and his normal time to bring her home is 6 p.m. so this was huge and as much as it felt like a sucker punch it was the pinch I needed to remind about what I am dealing with. I mean who does that to someone they say they want to work with or coparent with -- who does that? I was just absolutely shocked and floored that he didn't call me and that he had the nerve to book a flight getting in so late without any consult with me.
Of course the way the coward handled it was to send an email -- I had no clue there was an email until several hours later and had tried calling him several times during the day to ask him if I could go down to Florida to meet her -- he ignored all my calls because he knew he did wrong and he didnt' want to deal with it and then when I told him how I felt about his age inappropriate unilateral decision -- he just justified it -- said he needed to book the trip 21 days out. so he couldn't have picked up the phone and called me or talked to me? who does this?
Oh well -- I am back on track again. Does anyone have any solutions about this 11 p.m. return of a 2 year old? Do I have any recourse? This just seems crazy to me. I don't know what to do. Plus, his thinking that I was going to pay all of the travel arrangements to bring her back ran up a nice bill -- he changed the airlines because he didn't liek the time.
Barbara, can you also resend the guardian ad litem stuff -- we were assigned a court investigator and I need to read through the best way to prepare. he is going to lie lie lie !
I am sorry to have fallen down and hang my head low. I really thought I could fix the problem -- LOL - I really did.
we have
you are awesome -- I take no offense
a woman learning to love again
Reenek
I will remember her story
a woman learning to love again
demonstrate no love & compassion
reneek
Costs
reneek
Also, do not let him in your