4th hoover in a week...I'm hurt and confused
4th hoover in a week...I'm hurt and confused
After receiving 3 hoovers in a week and a half where he describes me as dysfunctional and sadistic but still wants to meet with me, this is the last hoover I got:
"Still quiet. You must miss out on a lot of things in life with your haughty and stubborn attitude. In the end, you're the one punishing yourself. But that's your problem.
I told you I wouldn't insist so goodbye".
I was at work when I got this and I started crying. Why? Because I'm hurt that the man I so dearly loved has so little interest in me and how I feel. None of his hoovers were inviting, they were all about him.
Yet, I wonder. What if he is right? Maybe I am refusing to talk to him for the wrong reasons. Maybe I should give him a chance to tell me those things he needs to tell me so badly. I feel like the bad guy. Maybe it would help me understand myself better, see and realise things I didn't see.
It feels like he won again. Being NC with him feels like it's my way of getting his attention, my way of "playing" with him and getting back at him and now he's declared it's over. He said good bye. I know I should be happy about this but there is something in me that is still hurting and longing for him somehow. I'll be honest, I miss him but at the same I don't. I'm the happiest I've been in a year. I won't reply though however tempted I might me. There is absolutely NOTHING in it for me. I know it. His message shows how ill-intentioned he is. My mind is saying one thing and my heart another. Cognitive dissonance at work...again. Leave me alone, please.
Deep down, I still wonder about the part I played in this sordid love affair. I want to find out. I'm still doubting my sanity, my mental health and my ability to be in a healthy relationship where I can make my partner feel good and valued.
What's the point of that last message again? What if he was right?
Alright ladies, I blocked
Good for you about blocking
______________________________________________________
God sometimes removes a person from your life for your protection. Don't run after them.
Mystwoman
Ditto to this outstanding post,
spinning
Respect Boubou
Good job
Boubou29
His emails are not about love
can you remember this...
two words:
you are still brainwashed by
I haven't replied to any of
Have you researched Trauma
Thank you for your
This may not be a popular
you are doubting your sanity
oh boubou
boubou, as mentioned
spinning
boubou, dearheart, you do not
spinning
Support Group?
Nonsense boubou!
If he has ZERO acess to you