A year for me too.

It has been a year for me too since I abruptly ended the relationship with the narc and went NC. A year! A lot of self prospection, thoughts, new insights.

I am so glad I ended it. It is so wonderful to live my life without the knife in my chest in permanence. It is amazing to be interested in things, in people, in events which have nothing to do with the psycho! Life does get better! A lot better!
I am forever grateful for the experience. Even if it has left some scars, it also taught me a lot. A lot about myself, about life.

If I have to put in few words the most important lesson I got it would be: I learnt to love and to respect myself. And still learn. The idea is not to fake the self-love which I always did before, but to really love the “inside” of me with all my feelings, my dreams, my desire, my emotions no matter if they are positive or negative. I now accept and fully love myself for who I am, unconditionally.

Would I ever achieve it without this experience? Not sure… Was the price to pay too high? Maybe… But, again, this is me and this is my life, this was my past which I now fully accept and … even love.

Thank you all moderators and members who helped me explicitly or implicitly. Thank you so much Lisa for this forum!

I wish you all courage and peace! For the newbies: Girls and Boys, keep NC, you will be rewarded, I promise.

Love

Winter