When you go back......
When you go back......
A situation has me pondering the many times I've gone back to my ex. What others around me that had been hurt by the relationshit, must have been thinking......
I'm seeing through this situation, that I was so caught up in the dynamic, the pathological relationshit, it didn't matter what anyone said to me. Being on the other side of the fence now, I do see how painful it must have been for my children and my friends, people who loved me and knew he treated me like shit.
each situation teaches me something, whether it's told to me or I find out about it another way when it comes to going back to the disordered one.
When you go back, those of you struggling with your NC, you give away your power. You're giving it to him. And if you have studied up on the disordered, you're knowingly going back, and hurting others around you. And you're hurting them because they love you. Being in a pathological relationshit requires an extreme degree of selfishness out of us, as much as the disordered one demands. There is room for little else.
So if you go back with your eyes wide open, the outcome is truly yours. The power he has is with glee because he will begin to destroy you worse than before, causing more harm to yourself and if you have children to them or people you are close to who love you, want for your happiness and know that where you're going is back to hell for more.
I've made the solid decision to obtain my Master's so I can provide therapeutic services especially for victims of psychopathy and this situation helps me to understand that while I and others can do our very best to love, care, encourage and support, the power of the disordered one over his partner, is sometimes too overwhelming for any of us to help her/him overcome. they have to be hurt over and over, sometimes forever. They are sicker than we are smart.
but we have to be smart enough with what we come to know, to understand that and find our way out of the web, and not just for us, but for those who love us so dearly and care far more than the selfish psychopath ever could.
Stay strong in your NC. It really truly is so worth it!
Sun, you are amazing!
he's like a cancer in my bone
Yup, malignant tumor
Yup, malignant tumor
Yup, malignant tumor
Yup, malignant tumor
Ditto FG
Tres!
((((((((((((( FG ))))))))))))))))
Sun, here's the rest
tres
Sun,
Tres
Great Post Sunafterrain
Lisa
Sun, it's easy to forget how our
tres
So you've been on this
Tres
sunafterrain