What an idiot!/ The satisfaction!!!!

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#1 Jun 2 - 5AM

Alisa

What an idiot!/ The satisfaction!!!!

So I did a bad, bad thing and broke NC but I knew what I was doing and I did it consciously and for two reasons: one, because I felt strong and two because I wanted to see if I am slowly getting over him.

I was online and he contacted me (I would have never initiated contact myself). Immediately he made a comment which was cryptic but led me to believe there was trouble with the OW.

OMG, what an idiot!!!! So he starts telling me about the issues he has with OW, poor him, she's jealous because he's hanging out with other women and he's wondering whether to break up with her because they've had this issue so many times and then almost simultaneously types "what are your plans for the weekend?"

I swear, I almost choked on my coffee laughing when I read that. Is he for real? I actually wanted to type that ("Are you for real?") but then didn't because he didn't wait for an answer, he said he needed to sort out his feelings, so I was like "Go, do that"

Wow, what an eye-opener! I am feeling so good right now because I can't believe what an idiot he is! I am also feeling satisfaction that he is not capable of continuing the relationship with OW, because he is too selfish and too much of a moron to do that. I actually do feel bad for OW (even though I have never met her) because if she's jealous it means she must have feelings for him. He dumped me about a year ago because things got too complicated. I feel bad because I know he will dump her, too and she'll think it's her fault because she was too jealous.

I am so over him, he's such a loser.

Oh, and he announced he's going to that sport event Friday (the one I go to as well) and this time I am not panicky at all because I know what I am dealing with. (the only thing that bothers me is that a new guy I like won't be coming. Would've been too nice to see Ns face when he sees me hanging out with fun guy)

I don't recommend breaking NC at all but for me this definitely worked. Also it once again proved that he is a narc (if I ever had doubts), but most of all I realized what a loser he is.
Poor OW. I wish I had her email-address so I'd tell her to dump his ass before he dumps her.

LOSER!!!

#2 Jun 8 - 6AM

Deidre40

For all you know, she's not

For all you know, she's not jealous, and he's lying. lol Yanno? The truth is what they make it to be, depending on their audience at the time. He wants to see you--so suddenly he's having troubles with the OW. Riiiight. Plus, they drive us to jealousy. I'm not a jealous person, but my ex was. And because he was always suspicious, his behaviors started rubbing off on me. I started becoming suspicious. He never accused me of being jealous. But, I felt things that I had never felt before him. Another reason I broke it off--he made me feel bad. Glad breaking NC helped you tho in this case!! Yep, they truly never change.

#3 Jun 7 - 10PM

enpsychopedia r... (not verified)

So wonderful

...to be able to laugh at them. They are after all, ridiculous. Puffed up cowards, liars, cheats and scoundrels. I'm laughing at mine 24/7 now. It's not a bitter laugh either. Just a moohaha--what a waste of space, clueless goof he is! AHAHAHa

#4 Jun 7 - 10PM (Reply to #10)

Arwen

Enpsych they really are

Enpsych they really are buffoons aren't they?

#5 Jun 7 - 11PM (Reply to #11)

enpsychopedia r... (not verified)

Yep, They're clowns. They

Yep, They're clowns. They should all don frizzy wigs, pop on big red noses and squirt water from plastic corsages. Too bad appearance doesn't reflect true personality. It would be a much safer world!

#6 Jun 7 - 10PM

Arwen

OMG THIS IS SO FAMILIAR!

OMG THIS IS SO FAMILIAR! Once again our narcs could be twins. When I first reconnencted with ex N, he said the exact same words to me about the OW he was seeing :"all of these girls come up to me in the bar and I tell them I'm with her but she still gets SO jealous and it's driving me nuts cause I don't do anything with those girls - it's not MY fault they come up to me". MOTHER FUCKING ASSHOLE.

#7 Jun 2 - 7AM

insectt (not verified)

Sounds familiar

My N just sought out an ex he broke up with about a year ago. They dated for a year and have been broken up for about a year. I'm not sure what specifically caused the break up as he doesn't tell me anything anymore..but I do know he started seeing another woman immediately after. He almost moved to another city to be with the 'new' GF. She wised up quick, tho and dumped him after about 4 months. Now he is hoovering to get the girl he dated for almost a year, back. Saying he wished he could have made things work and will and if he could have one 'do over' in life..it would to make it work with her? I'm like really? If you have only ONE chance to correct soemthing you messed up over..it would be to 'fix things' with someone you dated for just a year. Not fix it with your baby's momma who you dated for three years..then all of a sudden she is pregnant and it's a struggle for you to make a commitment to. Not 'fix things' with the person who helped you 100% with all your kid stuff, movie stuff, helped you buy a house, etc ... and have 'been with' for 4 years(me. You're going to use your theoretical 'one time' to fix things...on someone you barely know.. They never stop. Never.

#8 Jun 2 - 7AM

Smitten Kitten (not verified)

So Typical

I love how we're always "jealous" according to them. Mine always said that about me too, as if I had no reason to be. Imagine not wanting to share them with a bunch of OW. What women? he would say. There ARE no other women. They're just "FRIENDS." So when he hooks up with new GF and wants to change his image so she doesn't catch on, he untags ALL the photos of him with other women on FB and/or deletes them and changes his relationship status "so the flirting will stop." The non-existent other women dropped like flies. And in the end, it always ends the same, them with another woman or women. But yeah, we were too jealous for NOOOO reason at all.

#9 Jun 2 - 7AM (Reply to #5)

Alisa

See, the funny thing is I

See, the funny thing is I really never was jealous when I was with him. He'd meet ex-gf, female friends and I was totally fine with it as long as I felt he was spending enough time with me (if he had made plans meeting another female friend on the weekend instead of seeing me, I would have had a problem, but if he was doing that when I was busy, I didn't care). It was actually even funny how he'd always explain who that woman was even though I never asked. I am actually sure that he never cheated on me (we were together for 6 weeks!), nor did he dump me for some OW. He just got tired of me. My guess is, he has started the D&D with her and it won't matter what she does anymore. Poor OW, I mean it. I still remember all too well what it felt like for me last year around this time

#10 Jun 2 - 8AM (Reply to #6)

Smitten Kitten (not verified)

Mine was an expert in

Mine was an expert in triangulation, although I didn't know that's what he was doing at the time and it got worse and worse over time. We were in a LDR (which doesn't help with worrying about OW) for a little over a year. In the beginning I wasn't jealous and trusted him because I knew how he felt about me (or so I believed). But when he started pulling away a little at a time, and stopped interacting with me on FB while at the same time interacting and flirting more with more women, I started feeling insecure, and rightly so. He would suddenly have a new female friend who he'd met at a bar or party over the weekend and they would be flirting on his page. He would CONSTANTLY talk about the other women he knew too. Telling me what they said, what they texted him, what they emailed him, how many times they called, how long they talked on the phone, how they wanted to go out with him. I would ask him, why are you talking to them if you're not interested? Why are you friending someone you KNOW wants to sleep with you. What are you thinking? He would post stories on FB about some shenanigans that took place at a bar over the weekend with other women. Of course, it was always the other women who were coming on to him. He did NOTHING to encourage it and supposedly did not take them up on their offers. Because I didn't yet know what a liar he was, I believed these stories which were so far-fetched and continued to supposedly happen, but now I think they were completely made up for attention and to make me jealous. Then he started posting pictures with other women at parties. Not dates, just women at the party he took a picture with, many of them there with their husbands, but you wouldn't know it by looking at the picture. It just continued to get worse and he loved torturing me with it and then accusing me of being too jealous. Knowing what I do now, he was trolling for other supply all the time, but none of them were quite right so he kept using me. Up until the old GF came back into his life and I was discarded instantly. The thing I feared the most, that he would find someone else, is exactly what happened and it was always just a matter of time.

#11 Jun 2 - 7AM (Reply to #4)

Used

yep

OH yes ,apparently i was so jealous of him and his women friends......when he found out i had a male friend he came up to us...threatened us, tried to find out where male friend lived....screamed in our faces for months..i didnt do any of the things when i saw him with his w/f,,so who was the jealous one. TALK ABOUT THE KETTLE CALLING THE POT BLACK...WHAT AN PRATT..

#12 Jun 2 - 6AM

Hunter

I think you should alter your

I think you should alter your plans and run into his arms…. NOT!!! Hunter

#13 Jun 2 - 7AM (Reply to #2)

Alisa

When he started telling me

When he started telling me his issues I was close to typing "And that's when you thought "I could contact Alisa!"" I know I'll say something to him one day or another. At least my anger (which had gotten quite intense the past few days) is gone for the moment. I even feel a bit of pity but I doubt I'll ever be able to forgive, not even knowing he's disordered

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