wanted you to all to know

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#1 Sep 25 - 7PM
lilliandiane
lilliandiane's picture

wanted you to all to know

I need some time to process what has happened to me today, so I won't be on the site for awhile. I happened to google my father's name this morning and found out that he died on August 22. I can't understand what justifies not letting a daughter know her father has died. My step-mother and I had had a falling out, but I still can't imagine letting my husband's daughter find out about her father's death a month later on google. I still can't quite believe it. I texted my xN; he never texted back.
Thanks to all of you who have been supportive, and I will be wishing good things for all of you. At least when things get bad you can say, at least I didn't check google and find out what Lil did.

Sep 26 - 2PM
strivingforhealing (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

lilliandiane My heart and prayers are with you

Life can be so so painful.. Parental Loss is such a deep wound, and your story is so sad because there must have been so much angst and grief over the years with the separation from your father. and to find out like this- How awful. You are a brave woman deserving of so much love and goodness in your life. come back to us here when you are ready. you will get the unconditional love you deserve. My deepest condolescenses. Striving.
Sep 26 - 11AM
foreverfun1
foreverfun1's picture

do what you need to feel

do what you need to feel better but don't isolate yourself. try to come on this site even if you don't feel like it. you likely feel abandoned again, like what the narc did to you, so don't suffer alone. i'm so sorry this was done to you. no decent or normal human being would not contact a daughter regardless of anything that happened in the past
Sep 26 - 2AM
dulcinea441
dulcinea441's picture

So sorry. I will keep you in

So sorry. :( I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Soft Hugs xoxo
Sep 26 - 1AM
newbegginings
newbegginings's picture

Liliandiane

I am so, so sorry to read yr sad post. My heart and prayers are with you, as I can only put words down, I want you to know how upsetting it was to read this, and in total disbelief at some peoples cold cruel hearts. Youmust be so wounded today, please surround yrself with yr closest friends and family, and stay connected on the forum. Kind words will help keep you calmer, than if you dissappear and isolate yrself. Take care, and lots of warm hugs to you Timtam x
Sep 25 - 10PM
freaked
freaked's picture

Dear lilliandiane, i felt so

Dear lilliandiane, i felt so sad on reading about this. I pray for you dear. It is so shocking that some people are so utterly evil. Please accept my condolence. I know, it is just words, but you we are sisters because we are on this forum.
Sep 25 - 10PM
Journey
Journey's picture

I'm so sorry about your

I'm so sorry about your loss... how shocking to find out the way you did. (((((hugs)))))

Journey on...

Sep 25 - 9PM
Layla
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: (

So sorry to hear this news....my condolences to you I am heartfully sorry to read this. Be strong, be at peace, this too, shall pass. love~ Layla
Sep 25 - 8PM
ally2375
ally2375's picture

lil

I am just so sorry. :( That's terrible. I understand if you need to step away from this site for awhile, but please know that we're here for you. It doesn't have to be all Narc all the time - other stuff can be talked out, too. :) Again, I'm really sorry. ~Ally
Sep 25 - 8PM
Pride and Shame
Pride and Shame's picture

Absurd!!

That's absurd! There is no circumstance that should prevent a child being notified about a parent's death - none. Shame on them. I'm sorry for your loss.
Sep 25 - 8PM
dazedandcnonfused
dazedandcnonfused's picture

I am so sorry

I am so sorry for your loss. I dont know what the background is but I am thankful that you shared your painful discovery with us. I am going to start a thread so I dont high jack your post but this posting triggered me and perhaps in a weird way has helped me. My thoughts are with you and your family. I agree with Sparrow, now is not the time to walk away from your support group.
Sep 25 - 8PM
peteyrulz
peteyrulz's picture

so sorry LD please take care of yourself

this has got to be tough. My thoughts, prayers & hugs are with you. Hang in there, & we look forward to you rejoining when you're ready. I love your posts, you have a lot of insight and wisdom, like so many others on this fantastic board!
Sep 25 - 8PM
Sparrow
Sparrow's picture

I am so sorry for your loss.

I am so sorry for your loss. Now is not the time to take a break from the forum though. Stay here and work through this. Stay strong.
Sep 25 - 8PM
Winter
Winter's picture

I am so sorry for your loss

What your step-mother did is unacceptable and non human. May your strength stay with you during this difficult time. Love Winter
Sep 25 - 8PM
Sunafterrain
Sunafterrain's picture

Lilli

I'm so sorry. I'll keep you in my prayers. It's a vulnerable time for you. Stay NC. You're a strong woman and I know you'll get through this too. HUGS
Sep 25 - 8PM
Gravity
Gravity's picture

lilliandiane

So so sorry for your loss. No one deserves to find out in that manner. Thinking of you during this time. And don't beat yourself up too much for texting the xn but remember that you're in a vulnerable place and he will sense this so heed with caution. xooxox
Sep 25 - 8PM
needing2know
needing2know's picture

MY PRAYERS ARE WITH YOU HUN!

MY PRAYERS ARE WITH YOU HUN!
Sep 25 - 7PM
Susan32
Susan32's picture

Sorry for your loss

A month late?? That is terrible. As a daughter, you had a right to know about your father's death. What your stepmother did was cruel&abusive. Needless suffering&drama, on top of death. May your father rest in peace, and may you find consolation in this difficult time. May God grant you peace in this trying time.