Update--please read...and please help me?

Hi all;

I posted this morning, a thread. I made the horrible mistake of calling him at work this morning, whereby he tells me tonight, that he 'got in trouble' from that phone call. Not sure if he's lying. Don't know. I feel bad if he did, but what kind of job doesn't let you get a personal call ALL DAY? Really?? haha I don't buy it. Just another control thing.

Ok. So, I call him around 5pm. Another horrible mistake! He normally gets off at 5:30...but sometimes, he works these projects in 12 hour days. So, I simply called and this is how he answers the phone...''I'm still fucking here!'' I'm like...oook. I was just wondering if you're working a 12 today. He says...''No, I'll be off soon and will call you. I told you not to call me.''

Ok...so he calls me on my commute home from work...He proceeds to ream me that I got him in trouble. How I am not supportive in this job. How I'm not understanding. How I don't listen when he speaks. And on and on it went. Then the final thing? He said...''you know Dee? I think you're trying to sabotage this relationship and get me to break up with you.'' I said...''if you want me to go away, I will.'' He then said...''GO AWAY THEN...'' AND?????? Hung up! Yeah! Oh yeah! lmao! I can laugh now, wasn't laughing then.

I shut the phone off. I said...'self? you are NOT calling him back.' So, I got home. I turned my phone on...he had left a vm msg AND a few texts. That he loves me, he doesn't understand why I'm 'acting' this way. He doesn't understand why I can't be supportive and understanding of his job. (this was in voicemail) Then, his text said...If you want this to last, please call me tonight ...before I go to bed. (he has to get up at 4am) If I don't hear from you, I'll know you don't want this.

So, I didn't reply. He texted me again. See...what's interesting to note...is that he's losing control. When we don't reply ladies, they tend to get unhinged. Not because he loves me, but because he's going to 'lose.'

So, I called him tonight. I know what you're thinking. In a way...I wish I hadn't. But, I did. WHEN I end this...I don't want it to be just disappearing in silence. I believe in closure. With narcs, closure isn't always possible. I know this.

So...get this...He basically talks in a demeaning tone to me tonight. Tells me that I need to understand and...''be the good gf he knows I can be.'' haha Unreal, isn't it? I tried to speak...and he said...I need to go to sleep. I am sick, and need my rest. I will text you in the morning, and call you when I'm off. I answered...''ok.'' We then said goodbye.

I'm not exaggerating. And I mulled this whole thing over, and thought to myself...how did I get here. Oh, I did get something in edgewise. I told him tonight...''I don't want to be told how bad I am all the time.'' He said...''Then, be the supportive, loving person I know you can be.'' I KNOW YOU CAN BE? So, in other words Dee...you are not loving and supportive...and you gotta jump through another one of my fucking hoops, baby.

So, rather than argue. We ended the call.

Please tell me what to do now. I will eventually go NC, but I'm not just going to go NC now. That's not how you end a relationship. But, eventually, when you do say ''goodbye''...I firmly believe in NC.

So...what do you think I should do? I have a lot going on at work, and don't want to end things tomorrow. I don't need the drama or stress. I was thinking of telling him on Saturday...when I have off...that 'this isn't working. Doesn't matter who's right or wrong anymore...it's just not working. I wish you well.'' <<< IN TEXT OF COURSE :D

What do you think?