treatment of animals?

The ex-Psych professor envied my ability to bond with animals. While single men tend to have pets, he claimed early on that animals feared him. He was incredibly jealous when I talked about how a lost dog followed me back to campus. Unlike a lot of bachelors, he didn't have pets, not even reptiles or fish...

My XN treated my dogs pretty well (at least when I was around). He did, however, threaten me with getting rid them on a regular basic. I think N was saying this as way to control and upset me. I, also, had pointed out to him that if he EVER got rid of my dogs, (and they were mine - I wanted them, I adopted them, and I took care of them), that HE was going to be the next thing to be "gotten rid of". N's daughter, on the other hand, was mean to my dogs to the point that I forbid her to come anywhere near them. When she still lived with us, she was not given a key to house and not allowed in the house without an adult being present as she was also completely out of control and using drugs. I, also, threw her out of the house at my first opportunity for multiple reasons. She teased my dogs, picked at them, kicked and slapped them, and just LOVED putting the anti-bark collar on them (as it turns out just so that she could push the button to hear them yelp). The gleam of joy in her eyes was completely disturbing to me when I saw it, and I immediately got rid of the collar (I then got rid of her ASAP). My dogs hate her to this day...and yes, I do think she's a sociopath (for more reasons than just her treatment of my dogs). I guess I know at least, that if N's nasty daughter ever decides to break into my house that she's highly likely to get bitten by my dogs. lol.

During one of our many "off again" moments a little kitten had showed up at my house and adopted me. It was Winter and it took 30 minutes for me to coax her into the house. Once she was in however I dried her off, fed her and communicated to her that while I liked cats I was more of a dog person and that I would find her a good home. It wasn't long that I began to notice her acting more and more like a dog each day. Fetching, rolling over and loving her belly rubbed. (yes, fetching, even have it on video, LOL) Long story short, I had her fixed, shots and kept her. She's wonderful company and all she's known now in my company is good care and lots of love. Then he and I had another "on again" moment and I let him know that she came with the package. He agreed wholeheartedly, even buying her toys periodically. This "on again" lasted for 6 months and towards the end of this stint I was noticing my cat running to hide when we heard his truck pull into the driveway. I noticed when he entered a room she'd do the same thing. I thought perhaps she was just picking up on my energy and didn't think another thing about it. I began to notice however that when I would go to pet her she would cower and I would say to her, "you know I am not going to hurt you." I would watch his interactions with her at the end, and he would do to her what he was doing to me. Loving to reel her in, then abusive (verbally in "front" of me) and she'd scurry off. 2 weeks before I left I lifted her to me (she loves to be held and is a lapdog(cat) and told her... "I am gonna get us out of here soon, I am so sorry I did this to us". I did leave, and she has even calmed down to the sweet cat that adopted me in the beginning. I did feel some guilt however, when it occured to me this was exactly what I should have done with my kids when my choices were affecting them... Live and learn, and keep healing! ~~~~~ “The best revenge is to survive and be victorious over it. Nobody can take from you what you don’t give them,” --she said, (taken from my final remarks in a Sync Weekly Magazine article about my art and mySelf :)

I was seeing my ex narc in that story right up to the point about the water and food - i doubt he would even do that, but i could be wrong, God knows i was wrong about everything else.... Mine LOVED our dog BUT he would "switch" from playing to getting pissed at the drop of a pin. Poor dog went from having fun with him to getting kicked in the chest (and he is a BIG pit/mastiff ? mix who took to hiding in the closet whenever my ex narc raised his voice or i started crying) Glad to say that this behavior has stopped as he is with me, and gets nothing but love and attention, and the occasional arby's roast beef sandwhich without horsey sauce... LML