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Slight shift in perspective?

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#1 Mar 19 - 2PM
prettypeeved
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Slight shift in perspective?

A few days ago I was recommended this by a fellow member of this site.

I have to admit, I expected it to be much the same sort of thing as many other things I've read about NPD, but this one really blew me away.

I also had a therapy session on Friday night and I told my therapist that I was no longer feeling guilty towards Narc Boy...I just kept fantasising about telling him to get lost.

The funny thing is I seem to be increasingly regarding the narc in slightly different terms. Instead of feeling the loss of someone who, for whatever misguided reasons, meant something to me, I seem to be increasingly seeing him as a damaged little boy who I feel is barely worth my pity. He just seems...I dunno, dull?

Mar 20 - 1PM
Used
Used's picture

pettypeeved

i, called both exns boring by the end and i ment it, once i have heard the same old same old for the thousand time, i relized they had nothing else to say, i called them both boring. repetious bores and i believe this is why they have to get diffrent supply, b/c by then we have heard every tragic tale and then some, they are on a merry go round, thats why they end up back where they started, no where.
Mar 20 - 2PM (Reply to #9)
prettypeeved
prettypeeved's picture

It's kind of odd, it's a sort

It's kind of odd, it's a sort of full circle thing. When I first met him I thought he was boring, and now I've left him behind I think he's boring. Sometimes I wonder how things ever happened in the middle. Maybe the first time I met him he spiked my drink with some Narc Crazy Drug that lasted for a year or so!
Mar 20 - 2PM (Reply to #10)
Susan32
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The Wheel of Time

When I first met the ex-Psych prof, I thought he was boring... and yes, since I have a copy of one of his lectures, this is a secret greater than the Da Vinci Code- he's BORING! He had to pretend to be someone else in order to be interesting. Some Narcs were originals-Frank Lloyd Wright, Amedeo Modigliani, Leo Tolstoy, Arthur Schopenhauer-they came up with their ideas of their own, despite being jerks. The ex-P couldn't come up with an original idea to save his @$$. I used to call the ex-P the Poor Man's Colin Firth (if the poor man lived under a bridge in a cardboard box&had food stamps)... except Colin has talent. And now an Oscar. Heck, if I had gone to the ex-P's lecture on Quietism&happiness, I would've pulled out a sleeping bag&snored loudly during the duration. I wouldn't be drooling out of desire... but because I'd be sound asleep.
Mar 19 - 4PM
gettinbetter
gettinbetter's picture

Oh yeah I forgot to ask you

Oh yeah I forgot to ask you did you get sleepy reading the articles. I did! I still do! Crazy shit!
Mar 20 - 12PM (Reply to #7)
prettypeeved
prettypeeved's picture

A little...I think that's

A little...I think that's just cos they're so long!
Mar 19 - 4PM
gettinbetter
gettinbetter's picture

prettypeeved

I am so glad you went to this site. I wish everyone would. I feel that many here are actually dealing with borderlines and codependency and core woundedness. Shari Schreiber has pulled me out of the depths of hell. These articles were literally life changing for me. I am so glad that you actually went there after suggesting it to you. I was afraid that you might just oh just more of the same. It is hardly more of the same. To me it was the key to my own personal rubics cube. It has taken barc boys power a way. These articles have freed me from bondage Oh and btw the interestingness of the narc was really us finding our own pain interesting and sometimes that is hard to let go of but now the mystery of my own pain has been solved = less interesting
Mar 19 - 4PM (Reply to #4)
prettypeeved
prettypeeved's picture

I'm glad you made me aware of

I'm glad you made me aware of it. I did originally think it would be more of the same, but it's actually really good.
Mar 19 - 4PM (Reply to #5)
gettinbetter
gettinbetter's picture

It also makes you want force

It also makes you want force everyone on this site to read it but what can I say I'm a codependent, control freak, fixer LOL! Did you read the other article I posted by robert burney
Mar 19 - 2PM
michele115 (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

prettypeeved...

Yes, I'd have to agree..."Dull" about sums it up... once you "get it" they are predictable, simple, easy to read, textbook, and quite a drain on the brain, and i think it is due to our constant struggle with actually trying to find them interesting then running into a wall. Their "interesting" characteristics were what we made them in our heads... In reality...although a very simple one syllable four letter word, I can't think of a more accurate word... Yes...DULL is it...no more no less... just...DULL... Hugs!
Mar 19 - 2PM
Scoop
Scoop's picture

I urge everyone to read this

I urge everyone to read this especialy the stuff on borderlines , she really nails it and like you PP i had a real shift in my healing reading this ... another recomendation is a set of you tube vids called "the labyrinth of the psycopath " i know the guy wont mind me doing a recomendation because he is a sweetheart , he is an irish guy with such a lovely mannor about him and he tells it as it is .. a real sunday afternoon sit down with a cup of tea xx