Is she somehow special ??

I know that one size doesn't fit all. I know he is a narc and he won't change, but I think that it's normal at some point to have feelings and thoughts about him and the OW. He is been behaving with this OW somehow different. He is treating her better than he ever did to me although I am his kids mom and we had a 10 year relationship. That makes me feel so used and demeaned. I know now he cheated on me for the entire r/s ,but al least he hid it from me and I could not prove it. It seems that this girl means something for him and is different than the others. When I announced my pregnancy it seems that he was already dating her. She is 12 years younger than him. I was suspicious at the beginning but he didn't care because he never left her. It seems like he couldn't care less if I found out although I confronted him several times and he denied everything. He was showing himself with this girl in public and all our friends and people we know were talking about it. People couldn't believe how he could behave like that if he had a family and I was pregnant. Of course, you know how it is. Everybody is gossiping about it and you are the last person to find out. That sucks! I felt so humiliated, degraded, and demeaned. Everything has been so hard to process. I just can't believe how somebody can risk his family for somebody who came out of the blue. Somebody that obviously is with him for his money. He doesn't see his kids anymore because he is with her all the time. He has always been a workaholic and now he just leave his business unattended to go on vacation and weekend trips with her. He never did that with his family. In 10 years we just had 3 vacation trips. He was always too busy for us and "working" all the time. I know it wast true either. He didn't have any money when I met him, now he spends it all with this whore. I know it's my fault because I was always caring so much and never wasted the money. I was saving it for the next woman (so nice of me, right?)I am the kind of person who put myself last, always pleasing him and the kids, not spending one penny on myself and thinking about the future. What future?? I think I was insane when I thought I could build a future with this psycho.

Just needed to vent a little. Thanks for reading and commenting. I appreciate you guys are there to listen.

May God bless you all.

CH