The secret

I decided I will reveal my secret myself, which might hurt me and my family. But holding on to it will tie me to him possibly forever.

I'm so new to this I'm still confused about a few things. Our relationship began as friends, as my marriage was failing. He always gave advice, however I rarely took his advice regarding my divorce attorney. He would rant and rave about how I was being taken for a ride, the atty was incompetent. Of course all this eroded any self confidence I had but honestly, I would sit in my lawyers office and it was like he was speaking another language. I had so much fear I just could not comprehend anything

He did this too, regarding how I was raising my kids. And I did not change for him.

Maybe the benefit to him, even though i didn't "listen" was that he made me question myself, my sanity, my ability to make decision, which in the end kept me needing him.

Anyway, my question: wouldn't a narc leave the relationship after months of me not handling it the way he wanted? Was it just my asking that boosted his ego?

Also, when you refer to d&d do you mean a final discard or is it a pattern? I can't remember much positive he said recently, but our last interaction he asked me if I was retarded and I left. His good bye sounded final. I emailed him once, not expecting a reply. Is this the discard? He's gone a week before without responding.

I'm scared what will happen if he tries to contact me, since we never had closure. Will he give up, call occasionally, get angry? Do some just let it go? He has always told me that no matter what he will always be my friend. If I call him in a month, a year, six years, he will come help me. Now mim thinking he was only thinking how much power that would give him.

Do you typically let them know you want nc, or can it just happen like this, no closure.

My relationship was less than 6 months and most of it was friendship. I feel grateful I discovered the truth early on. I really appreciate everyone on here giving such great advice! And I suffer so much I really feel for those who had long term relationships.

Omg. He never ever let me in his home and I believed his lame excuses. I'm so embarrassed
thinking about that.

I'm afraid to face whatever lies I might discover.

Sorry for the random thoughts. Just trying to process

I even still ask myself is he REALLY a narc? Maybe he just has a few traits.

:-(((