pedophile

31 posts / 0 new

#1 Sep 20 - 11PM

kiwi10

pedophile

one time, my X and i were watching to cat a predator and this guy was going to meet what he thought was a thirteen year old girl. when they busted him and took him to jail me husband (at the time) said 'poor guy'....
I'm so ashamed i stayed with him :(

#2 Sep 24 - 9PM

Bella68

I totally agree

I totally agree FedUp....took me a bit, but I now know this!!! And FierFlie......THANK YOU for that little bit of info that all of us need to hear!! Cheers Ladies :)

#3 Sep 24 - 12PM

helldweller

watching him go out with . . .

a six year old instead of me. I'm hanging tough. Have my phone blocked. Packing my stuff to move. And just went out to water my pots and there he was, in his winter uniform (long sleeved navy t shirt and jeans and white gym shoes) and his foster child in long sleeved navy t shirt and jeans and white gym shoes. All the neighbors laugh about his "Mini me" and I just can't think it's funny. I just can't wait to leave. I'm tired of watching the same damn show over and over.

#4 Sep 22 - 12AM

helldweller

pedophile

Well, I don't know if he is abusing the child, but he has hit him since the day he came and the child has apparently never told a single social worker or counselor anything to make anything suspect, so he must have the child trained very well. I doubt if any abuse will come out anytime soon.

#5 Sep 21 - 8PM

hopefuljms

I don't think mine was a

I don't think mine was a pedophile, but he left me for a 23 year old college student and he was 41 at the time. I think it was more that she was gullible enough to believe his crap and she is only 7 years older than his son. And how is this for bizarre, they got married on a day his son couldn't attend.

#6 Sep 21 - 9PM (Reply to #27)

kiwi10

i was 27 when he was 41

#7 Sep 21 - 8PM

michele115 (not verified)

Something that sends chills down my spine....

The NARC predator I am told, (of course after the fact, a few years later by a "friend" of mine...which I think now is a rather crappy friend because she knew I had a child in the house)...made a comment to a friend of the friend that his daughter is so beautiful, if she wasn't his daughter he would do her! Now that I know what I know, I have to believe it to be true. This daughter was given up to a foster parent after her mother died of AIDS and at the time my NARC was strung out on Crack. She's 24 now but GEESH...maybe I need a bathe in acid or something to rid myself of his crud. This really has to have some basis in demonic possession, I really cannot wrap my head around the depth of evil these men are...what gives?

#8 Sep 21 - 8PM

Bella68

OMG.....well my Ex N left me

OMG.....well my Ex N left me for a 19 yr old and he is 43!!! We were together for 10 yrs and my daughter is 19.......makes me shutter and so sick to my stomach wondering if he leered at her.

#9 Sep 21 - 2PM

Briseis

My exNarc came home one day

My exNarc came home one day with a fourteen year old girl in his truck. He was high as a kite, and told me he was going to drive her down the mountain to town for a court date. I got in the truck with her and called another friend to come and get her. She was NOT going anywhere with him in that state. I asked her (she was crying) "Where is your mother?" and she said "back in jail." After I got the RO, the sheriff told me this same girl ended up in the ER the month before with alcohol intoxication. She told them that my exNarc had bought her the whiskey. He'd told me that she was one of the "town pumps" and hung around folks who would buy her drugs/booze and exchange sexual favors for it. He talked about her (in our screaming fight the day he brought her up in his truck) as if she were a piece of trash and there was NO thought in his head that this was a FOURTEEN YEAR OLD GIRL. I am so ashamed I didn't call the sheriff and report him :( And that I didn't get rid of him then. I will have to live with this . . . I tell myself I was pretty sick then, too. But it's no excuse.

#10 Sep 21 - 4PM (Reply to #23)

kiwi10

oh my god

isn't he a judge or something?? what i wrong with them? my attorney ex husband goes around bragging about how he respesented teenage pregnant mothers who needed an abortion without parental consent and how he saved their lives, the he talks about pregnant teens as whore and bad people... bad people he'd love to screw.

#11 Sep 21 - 7AM

helldweller

pedophile

OH, this thread makes me so scared. The narc's foster child is almost seven and the narc still sleeps with him, holds his hand everywhere, kisses him on the lips, and is generally obssessed with him. When I think "There's no way he would do anything to him" I think about the stuff he has gotten ME to do to him--and I'm an adult. I think: these people are out there, and he is the strangest person I've ever met, so . . .? It's so true about them being lazy. I really think mine was so adamant about not letting me go because I was so damn convenient. I also wonder, now, just thinking if maybe him not letting me in his bed had something to do with this.

#12 Sep 21 - 10AM (Reply to #21)

kiwi10

helldweller

i dont mean ti scare you, but have you ever seen the movie about marilyn monroe 'blonde'? she has a forster dad in it who leers sexually at her and my husband took up for the guy then mentioned he wanted to adopt a teenager!!

#13 Sep 21 - 12AM

betty2020

my xN is a pedophile. I

my xN is a pedophile. I caught him targeting young girls 16 and under on Myspace. It disgusts me to this day to know i laid with a child molester and never knew anything at all! They are so good at what they do it is just unreal to believe. only one way to go...Forward (tm?)

only one way to go...Forward (tm?)

#14 Sep 25 - 12AM (Reply to #19)

WiserNow30

My xN is a pedophile too.

My xN is a pedophile too. His ex-wife caught him on a teen dating website posing as a 17 year old. He was 28 at the time.

#15 Sep 21 - 12AM (Reply to #10)

cluelessuntilnow

betty2020

My xN recently commented to me on his desire for 18 year old girls, but quantified it with a comment about alas he is too old. This was not his first comment of this nature. Given that we have a child that age I was deeply disturbed. It makes me wonder...

#16 Sep 21 - 6PM (Reply to #18)

ShaynasMommy

yeah, I wonder too

now that Im learning more about all this, I wonder if my ex n is sick enough to even go there (pedophilia). I know his dad was thrown in prison for having sex with his 15 year old stepdaughter, who knows when they actually started this liason. I know that the ex N was a little pervert in the sack, so could he actually be like his dad? Someone long ago mentioned that it could run in the family, as in like daddy like son, but i blew it off as paranoia. Now im not so sure It makes me shudder to know that any kids we may have had together would be in that danger from him.....or grandpa!

#17 Sep 21 - 12AM (Reply to #11)

betty2020

They do have a lot of hidden

They do have a lot of hidden sexual fetishes and sexual deviance. This is one of characteristics that seem to really stand out with the Narcissist. When you think about this it makes sense. They really do strive to conquer and posses the things that are a challenge. They are lazy yes but if the can get something that is more difficult to find and get it makes them feel all that more special so they will try. Sometime they do score. It is a tremendous ego boost for them. This is case in point. This is a challenge and is also taboo so it makes it all the more exciting and dangerous which gives them the feeling of power. Most victims never know the true depths of their xN sexual deviance until they are long out of the relationship. It is very sad. only one way to go...Forward (tm?)

only one way to go...Forward (tm?)

#18 Sep 25 - 12AM (Reply to #17)

WiserNow30

I found my xN's porn sites

I found my xN's porn sites on his computer. Really sick stuff that was so disturbing and demeaning towards women. I mean we're talking women having sex with animals. He's a totally evil freak.

#19 Sep 21 - 1AM (Reply to #12)

cluelessuntilnow

Betty2020

Thanks for your comments. Two things stand out. When I met him I was a challenge (engaged) and I still am today 15 years later (married). It is the thing he loves and hates about me. The challenge... so that makes sense that as he experiences life his challenges will change and will need to get more extreme. In retrospect a good male friend of mines said don't be fooled, he wants to conquer you, not love you. Hindsight is 20/20. On the note of hidden sexual deviance, this was apparent to me years ago, red flags I ignored. We are now 20 years on since I met him and so honestly I shudder to think about where he is at now. My only saving grace is that I have not been in a romantic relationship with him for 16 years and he is married to someone else (though I know he cheats on her, but I am beginning to wonder with whom i.e. how old, gender,etc..)Not that this really matters but for my son's sake I am trying to keep my eyes open and no longer ignore warning signs. I am learning to trust my gut and his comments screamed at me "not normal, disturbing".

#20 Sep 21 - 2AM (Reply to #16)

betty2020

They do love the challenge

They do love the challenge and they also get bored rather easy. This combination makes for disaster. they are a promiscuous lot and will hide behind all guises to make you think they are alter boys!! Not so. They are deviant to the core. Just great at the game of lies and manupulation. only one way to go...Forward (tm?)

only one way to go...Forward (tm?)

#21 Sep 21 - 1AM (Reply to #13)

Alive

too young..

When i first met my EXN he was twenty nine, I asked about his previous gfs etc, he proudly said that he went out with a seventeen yr old?????? wrong so wrong when i look back i feel dumb founded that i never seen these red flags.

#22 Sep 21 - 1AM (Reply to #14)

cluelessuntilnow

happynow

when a man in his 40's is openly and repeatedly envious of his son for being able to date girls that are 18 (age appropriate for his son, not him) there is a problem. Don't feel dumbfounded, when you are in the midst of their charm it is easy to dismiss. I dismissed so much, so much that I did not want to see. Honestly, if these comments had been made when I was younger, or less informed, I would have dismissed it as "guys will be guys", but my senses seem more acute and I feel more atuned and wiser these days. Normal men don't say the things my exN says. And no amount of charm is going to blind me again.

#23 Sep 21 - 2AM (Reply to #15)

Alive

oh you

Oh you are so right!. The dumbfounded feeling has been one that has overwhelmed me the most, yes i went through hell with other feelings but this feeling is so deep, not just for me but for my family aswell. Thankyou for your kind words. I suppose after reading all the painful posts has made me relise that i have come such a long way. Flashbacks with these N's is so overwhelming...:(

#24 Sep 21 - 12AM (Reply to #2)

kiwi10

oh betty

how terrible :( i'm so sorry

#25 Sep 21 - 12AM (Reply to #3)

betty2020

Its hard when you cant wash

Its hard when you cant wash your body enough to get the crud off of you. I will always feel dirty b/c of him and what he has done to children. I dont care the amount of therapy, some things will just always stay with you and this is one of them. Thank you fierflie for your support. It really means alot to me....:) only one way to go...Forward (tm?)

only one way to go...Forward (tm?)

#26 Sep 21 - 1AM (Reply to #4)

Alive

to All

I am very sorry that any of you have had to go through this. My thoughts are with you. 'some things' WILL stay' always my dear. I hope we can all find peace.

#27 Sep 21 - 2AM (Reply to #5)

betty2020

Yes Happy, some things will

Yes Happy, some things will just always remain. This is that part of my past that will never be ok. No matter how much you try it just cant be ok ever. You just learn to accept that this is the baggage. In time it gets lighter as your use to carrying it. But you carry it for eternity. Peace is still attainable just takes a bit more work to get there. I will always move forward and never give up. Never.... only one way to go...Forward (tm?)

only one way to go...Forward (tm?)

#28 Sep 21 - 8PM (Reply to #6)

almostlydia

Betty

When I first started researching I spent a great deal of time and effort learning about sexual addiction. That is why I have been somewhat confused by the 'somatic narcissist' definition because I can't distinguish much between the two. A sex addict will eventually spiral out of control by the need for riskier liasons in order to get their 'fix'. It is like the alcoholic who now needs 5 drinks instead of 3 to get the same results. It includes 'samesex' and eventually can lead to pedophilia. This is when they finally get caught and lose everything. This is when the narcissist is no longer just a narcissist but something far worse. The exN was so afraid of jail that he was controlled. But a huge breaking point was when I was sure he was setting up the young male waiter (my son's age) to do what I believe was his new game. Turning young innocent guys. It was sick beyond belief. But they were legal - early 20's. That was good enough for him. almostlydia

almostlydia

#29 Sep 22 - 12AM (Reply to #7)

STSwiss

not pedo...but something wierd

There was a 17 yr gap between me and mine. I was less than five years older than his eldest daughter. His sordid affair at the end of the marriage took place with a 24 yr old (30 yrs younger than himself). I think it has to do with being able to manipulate the younger ones easier. Mine certainly had nothing to offer physically. He seduced her with words over the internet. Web Of Lies - My Life with a Narcissist An honest and emotional account of life with a pathological partner. http://singlemumsal.blogspot.com/ http://www.sarahtateauthor.com/

Web Of Lies - My Life with a Narcissist
http://www.sarahtateauthor.com/
http://singlemumsal.blogspot.com/

#30 Sep 24 - 2PM (Reply to #8)

fedup

I was thinking the same thing

Noticing the recurring theme of N men pursuing much younger women...... It could be sexual deviancy in part, plus having shiny new arm candy to make them look good... But I think a lot of it is being able to manipulate younger women more easily.Those who've not yet had enough experience to see manipulations for what they really are.From an N's perspective, it's like going after the low-hanging fruit--easy pickins'. Gee, they're so pathetic.

#31 Sep 24 - 5PM (Reply to #9)

kiwi10

yup

i was in my twenties and he was in his forties. i worshipped him until the day he left, then some time after that until I snapped and freaked out. so at least if they leave you for a younger girl, i can make you feel better knowing they won't get treated better.... OMG, trust me.

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