Oxytocin Bonding

Here's a question for y'all. I keep reading about the rush of oxytocin you get from sex. But can you get it just from kissing? I swear, I get as big a rush from a good ole fashioned make-out session.

Yes, meeting up with NON-CharlieSheen went well last night. Trying to take it slow and not bond, but really? I'm in an oxytocin daze just from kissing the man.

So. . . just had to ask. . . .

Recovering Suzie's picture

I get where you are comming from. When I first stared dating after my NH died, I would be pissed if I didn't get at least a kiss on the first date. This proved a little confusing for my dates. I'm kind of a good girl and good girls don't usually kiss on first dates or so I'm told. (Really, we ar in our 40's and no kissing on the first date?) For months I swear I would look at every I guy I met as potential 'face-sucking' material. My current boyfriend cannot believe his good fortune! I think it's a result of so many years of oxy addiction. My NH kept constant physical contact, tons of kissing, hand holding.... I think it has left a long-term residual affect not unlike a sex addiction. I'm still trying to figure it out; I think I am in a dangerous and vulnerable state. For now, I have found a very willing partner to help me 'work through' my needs. Suzie
Lobo555's picture

I'm in my 40s and never know what the right thing to do is. Dating is so confusing -- it's stuck in the 50s and totally hedonistic at the same time. You're a prude if you don't do things in a certain amount of time, a slut if you do. I often wonder where the line is -- it keeps moving. I do think you're right -- oxy-addiction is like sex addiction. I don't drink, do drugs, or gamble -- but man, I love me some oxy-crack. :)
foreverfun1's picture

yeah i read somewhere that once we are bonded, just the smell or thought of that person spikes our oxitocin!
Lobo555's picture

I've been in an oxy-fog since last evening. :/
MandyM's picture

I always felt like I got it just from TALKING to him.
Lobo555's picture

To me, humor is a huge aphrodisiac. So a good, funny conversation. . . hoo boy. Watch out. CharlieSheenWinning eventually learned the kind of off-beat humor that would really make me laugh. This was unfortunate. . . for me. As moody, prickly, and cold as he was -- man, that guy could be *funny*. Funny + Good Kisser = I'm a Gonner. Oxy-crack flowing through my veins in its purest, most potent form.
StudentOfLife's picture

"What Women Want: Oxytocin" http://www.newser.com/story/105434/what-women-want-oxytocin.html (---my take on this --> oxytocin is a "happy hormone", so to be suddenly deprived of our source for this , is like losing our *fix* ...be patient while our levels regulate and we get back to "normal"> ****************************************** Oxytocin in Women: http://site.themarriagebed.com/oxytocin ****************************************** Excerpt from a book called "Sex Detox": http://books.google.com/books?id=QVxn10FaDmoC&pg=PA117&lpg=PA117&dq=oxytocin+detox&source=bl&ots=FPYp7PQ9fr&sig=66Couec2fRMab2313zj3S5hJZb8&hl=en&ei=HSN7TvjWKcbnrAfT5ummDw&sa=X&oi=book_result&ct=result&resnum=8&sqi=2&ved=0CGwQ6AEwBw#v=onepage&q=oxytocin%20detox&f=false ******************************************** Oxytocin: The Love Bug http://www.wellnesswithangela.com/stopsugarcravings/2011/oxytocin-the-love-bug ********************************************
StudentOfLife's picture

Lobo555, I am really glad you posted this because i also was just thinking about oxytocin and wondering how long it really takes for our bodies/minds physiology to get back to "normal", regular levels.... and i wonder how much of our emotional state while going through our recovery process, the ups and downs, etc... is dictated by our levels of oxytocin, while we're going through sort of a detoxification process. I'm going to post a little bit of information i found when i *googled*.... very very interesting stuff!! ******************************************** Beware of Oxytocin! http://www.examiner.com/relationship-advice-in-sacramento/beware-of-oxytocin "You think Karma is a Bitch! You haven't seen anything yet! Meet Oxytocin; a woman’s greatest dream or her worst nightmare. You haven’t heard of her? Some says she’s Karma’s twin sister, separated at birth. You can tell she’s related to Karma, because she seems like fun one day, but you hate her, the next. She’s the type of sistah who will play with your emotions and romance you, but then come back to bite you in the backside. Others say she is the devil, disguised as an angel. Truly, a celestial being from Hell! So just who is she? And why do women need to beware? Do men need to fear her also? Let us elaborate. Oxytocin is a chemical released during physical contact. This includes hugging, kissing and touching. And oh yes, sex! Women release large amounts of this 'cuddle hormone' during intercourse. It is in fact, what bonds a woman to a man. Have you ever wondered why a woman can be so attached to a moronic loony tune? Have you seen the ones who chase after thugged-out miscreants? What about the educated woman who runs behind the low-down dirty, rotten scoundrel? She has been smitten by the devil called Oxytocin. It seems like an enigma, but in fact it’s a known truth. A woman who has sexual contact with a man is wired to bond with him, rather she wants to or not. That’s why some women have cravings and can’t shake the addiction. She feels like she can’t live without him, because her brain and hormones told her that. Her prognosis is good, though. The best defense against large doses of oxytocin is the same as all chemically induced substance addictions; detoxification! Sure a woman suffering from large doses of oxytocin behaves like a fiend -out sex addict, but she can’t help herself. She has ingested a ginormous amount of the sexually-induced hormone. She needs to run to rehab, pronto! The man will thank her for it and she might even thank herself. She needs to rush into detox fast, because unless she and he are both prepared for a long-term committed relationship, she is probably wearing him out with the incessant phone calls, twenty-one questions and late night romps in the hay. He might like it at first, but ladies beware, every man is not worth bonding with! You must decide which is. While his love potion may be intoxicating, oxytocin will come back to bite you in the buttocks. She will make you wish you never tasted of her, because you crave her like a cracked-out drug fiend. If your man is not into you, you need intervention. Instead of following after him like a zombified nincompoop,bereft of your God-given senses, ask yourself: does he love me? Will he make a good father and loving provider? If we procreate, can I deal with him for the next eighteen years? Will I be able to put up with him vicariously through our children for the rest of their natural-born lives? If your answer is a resounding, “no!” get a grip! Get help immediately! You need to detox and get him and that evil heifer, oxytocin out of your system! By the way, what is detox? It is abstaining from sex for a period of time, until you are void of any toxins, associated with unhealthy bonding. You must abstain, even though you will have withdrawals. Relationship experts advise thirty to ninety days, depending upon the dosage ingested. Some women have reported needing up to a year, but that’s an extreme case. The first step to getting help is admitting you have a problem. Next comes doing something about it. Detox is a good starting point. This means you withdraw from all sexual contact until he is out of your system. Your brain, your man, and your va ja jay will certainly thank you for it. If you have met oxytocin and found her to be an unwanted guest,evict her at once! She can be trouble. She will romance you on Tuesday, but come back to haunt you on Friday. Unless you care to entertain her, go to rehab immediately. Detox is in order! Interestingly, while there are times oxytocin is a an unwanted guest, there are times, she is gladly welcomed. Oxytocin can be useful when administered to pregnant mothers undergoing a stress test in order to gaurantee their baby is healthy, according to Sutter Medical Center's Antepartum Testing Unit Team in Sacramento. The fetal heart rate is evaluated for accelerations in response to contractions from oxytocin when it is administered through the mother intravenously. As you can see, oxytocin can be a woman's worst enemy or she can be a woman's best friend. Deal with her at your discretion; and always use wisdom and precaution. ARticle is found at http://www.examiner.com/relationship-advice-in-sacramento/beware-of-oxytocin
Lobo555's picture

I need to read this over and over! The guy is going away now on a trip for 4 days. So, I can clear my head and detox a bit. It's been a little over 6 months since I was with CharlieSheenWinning, my last source of oxy-crack. So, hopefully I've healed from him enough to not fall into another oxy-trap. I kept thinking I literally *couldn't* get swept up by anyone again. But. . . here I go again. :)
StudentOfLife's picture

I actually could not believe there is a *PRODUCT* out there like this! This company actually markets oxytocin and states some suggested uses!! OMG!!! OMG!! http://oxytocinnasalspray.org/
Lobo555's picture

Good Lord, that's the *last* thing I'd need! Daymn. Female Vulnerability Drug in a convenient spray. Scary.