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Obsessed with a Borderline?

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#1 Mar 9 - 2PM
Anonymous (not verified)
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Obsessed with a Borderline?

Shari Shreiber...as suggested on a thread by one of our members...THANK YOU!

http://gettinbetter.com/obsessed.html

Mar 9 - 6PM
ABC0311
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These articles are great!

These are really getting me out of the temporary "funk" I've been in during the last couple of days (is he or isn't he?!?). I have therapy tomorrow afternoon... Printing and highlighting in the AM so I will be ready to discuss!!!
Mar 9 - 7PM (Reply to #9)
gettinbetter
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ABC0311

Shari Schreibers stuff has helped me alot. I read it often and every time I do I extract another piece of useful info. This is one smart lady who put things in real life terms without a bunch of psycho babble
Mar 9 - 2PM
ally2375
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BPD article

Thank you for posting this. Of everything I've read on Cluster B's over the last few months (and I've read VOLUMES) this article resonates like nothing else. In particular, this: "When your relationship with a Borderline ends, it's incredibly painful because you haven't just lost him or her, you've lost yourself. When the chaos/drama of that affair stops, so does your ability to self-activate and feel alive. When you feel nothingness, you're spiritually bankrupt and disconnected from your Self." That's it. It's like walking away caused my emotions to be switched off like a light, and I can't find them now. I'm sad, yes, but otherwise just flatlining. Thanks SOI for recommending and Michele for finding and posting.
Mar 9 - 3PM (Reply to #7)
michele115 (not verified)
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Thank you Sick of it!

Between trying to cut and paste and copy, I couldn't go back to the thread to remember who posted the suggestion but yes, it was your posting that sent me searching...
Mar 9 - 3PM (Reply to #2)
gettinbetter
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your welcome ally. Her stuff

your welcome ally. Her stuff has helped me immensly. I think a lot of the people on here are dealing with borderlines. I also think many of us have codependency issues. Go to her site she has many good and informative articles. I have corresponded by email with as well
Mar 9 - 3PM (Reply to #3)
ally2375
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SOI

Thanks again. I've discovered both my question and my answer on her website. I think I had an instinct that my inability to heal had something to do with a wound not related to my ex. I have a better idea what the problem is now.
Mar 9 - 3PM (Reply to #4)
gettinbetter
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Read her articles over and

Read her articles over and over but take some time in between like maybe a week or so and every time you go back and read you will get more out of it. She seems to have quite and understanding about borderlines. She suggests that Borderlines do somewhat more damage than the narcs although they can have traits of both. I have struggled to recover from this as I had had a previous long term relationship and a pregnancy with this man. So his return after 15 years ignited some deep truama in me. Its the best stuff I have read to date. Oh I wanted to ask you did you get sleepy when you read it? I did and she goes on to say that it is quite common for that to happen that its a somatic response to trauma and something you dont want to face. Just curious if it happened to you? And the song goes "Borderline feel like Im goin to lose my mind..."
Mar 9 - 3PM (Reply to #5)
ally2375
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SOI - not the song again!

I just got that infernal song out of my mind and now it's back! I can't thank you enough for pointing me at the website. I'm getting so much peace from reading these articles. There isn't a shred of doubt in my mind the my ex was borderline. Not one. EVERYTHING she talks about fits. I can't even tell you what a relief this is - I don't even know why. Maybe because now that I know what the problem is I can heal it? Yeah, sleepy... I DO feel that way! I can't read a lot at a time. It's like it makes me EMOTIONALLY tired, if that makes any sense. I've also had other physical symptoms of stress recently. I read in another post about your hives (sorry to hear.) I know my health issues are stress related, physical manifestations of the emotional issue.
Mar 9 - 3PM (Reply to #6)
gettinbetter
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yes Ally I have had many

yes Ally I have had many physical manifestations which go hand in hand having been involved with a borderline. I have often felt like Im the borderline as in the end it was me clinging for dear life. In a weird sort of way, I know exactly what he is feeling because Im feeling it. It is hard for me to tell which are my own emotions and which ones he has projected on to me. I guess thats what you call real enmeshment and I dont even speak to him anymore. If you have a short question for her email her and she will respond. I have emailed her a couple of times and within a few days she responds. This woman gets it. Borderlines do a whole different kind of damage and its severe if you are exposed long enough