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NYE blahs

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#1 Dec 30 - 9PM
Anonymous (not verified)
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NYE blahs

I was doing very well...since my xmas eve night out at two parties...but now NYE is coming up...and I have only one invite to which i dont feel like going.

Friends that were off all week who I tried to contact (who had the xmas eve party) and who said stop on over we are both off all week... well no reply until tonite with a 'we were running around all week' and we were invited to four NYE parties but not sure what I feel like doing (this coming from the wife) who does everything in her power to control what the hubby does and who he sees.

sigh. so that option is out. and a tad disappointed that they never contacted me the whole week that I was off. They know I am disabled and stay home all week.... I know it is the wifey and not my friend...just sux.

I had fun there xmas eve like the good old days...but now I find myself thinking of XN a bit.

my mom went to a nearby town with her bf today where XN lives..so maybe that stirred up some memories.

i know this time last year XN D&D me and on NYE I got a happy NY text...it was a very painful time for me.

i am more blah..than sad I guess looking for understanding from friends when none is to be had.

Overall on a scale of 1-10 on thinking about XN it is a 2 ..very very low these days. somedays not at all.

Dec 31 - 8PM
nhtmf
nhtmf's picture

Destiny, I don't know if it

Destiny, I don't know if it will help at all but your're not the only one going through this. I was alone all Xmas Eve and Xmas day as well as NYE and I'm sure NYD. My phone never even rang from a friend to see how I was doing. I'm getting a real attitude about my so called friends but not sure if they're staying away because of their self-centeredness or because of my PTSD. I don't trust my own judgement calls on others right now. The friends I spent T-giving with were talking about Xmas dinner but I only got an official invite at 11:15 AM on Xmas eve. Was really insulted because they know that I would never feel right coming to their house without at least a couple of dishes and desserts. Its almost like I was called "too late" so I wouldn't go. Might be the PTSD but I'm not so sure..............
Dec 31 - 9PM (Reply to #4)
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

nhtmf

that's not the PTSD that's them being RUDE and that's not a real FRIEND! go to a DV center and join a support group... go to a shelter and offer to walk a dog once a week... you don't need these toxic people who lower your self-esteem and make you question yourself in your life! You are worth better! ~~~~~~~~~ The truth will set you free... but first it will piss you off - Gloria Steinem Visit My Abuse Website
Dec 31 - 10AM
Carolyn
Carolyn's picture

Sometimes you have to be

Sometimes you have to be your own best friend. Think about making a list of things you want for the next year. Decorate it with clip art or pictures from magazines and read it at midnight. then read it every night before you go to bed. Really want what you put on the list and put some real thought and emotion into the list. You will be very surprised how it all works out. some New Year's are fun but sometimes when you don't go out you feel everyone is out there having fun and for single women a lot of people reject you. That makes you think of being with a male partner, and the last partner was the bad guy so you think of him. It is something you have to change with an other idea. I am able to take care of myself emotinally, I hope for peace and prosperity for my friends, family and for myself. When you start drifing in your thinking towards him just change the thought for something more positive. There are millions and millions of people who are in bad places, sick, alone you are just in-between things. have a great new year you deserve the best.
Dec 31 - 12AM
MsVulcan500
MsVulcan500's picture

That is great that you are

That is great that you are at about 2 on the "thinking of N" scale. That is real progress! You should be proud. Remember, NYE is one night, and though some people make a big deal out of it, it is really just another night. Some years you end up having big plans and other years things just don't pan out. Think about what you want for yourself for the coming year. Focus on that.