Is THIS a "normal" feeling
Is THIS a "normal" feeling
I'm just wondering if anyone can explain something to me? I've noticed that after I was discarded, I did still have a couple of my OWN friends, separate from my EX. If anyone hasn't read my story, I moved to another state to be with him and the ONLY people around were HIS friends/family. Towards the END of the relation-shit, I had made a couple of friends OUTSIDE of his friends/family and ONE of them I became close to and she was was so supportive through the first few weeks....and we've remained close and talked off and on ever since. She doesn't particularly care for my EX and even told me that she could "SEE that he appeared different in public with me then in private" because I later learned that SHE to had dealt with an N and knew what I was going through.....
Well, she had surgery a couple of weeks ago and I didn't hear too much from her, which I really didn't expect to anyway. Her mother was down helping with her recovery and so on. Once in a while I would see her b/f on Facebook and ask how she was feeling etc. He would tell me and I'd tell him to just have her call/text me when she has time since she was recovering and also trying to spend time with her mom. She also text me about 2 weeks ago and told me she was "sorry she hadn't called/text and she would soon".
Now I understand it's just before Christmas and people are busy and what not but since I hadn't heard from her I had sent her a text last week and I called her and left her a vm yesterday and still nothing. Then I saw her b/f online and asked how she/they were doing and once again asked him to ask her to call me when she has time.......he never responded to me and I am wondering if I "did something" to upset them? I mean, I KNOW that I didn't do anything but can't help but feel paranoid.
Is this anxiety/paranoia something I developed from the relationship? I'm only asking because I know my ex had demonized me to his friends/family after a while and I was "ostracized" by them and he always said it was "my fault that no one came to visit or that no one came around" even tho I knew I hadn't DONE anything and at the time didn't KNOW he was making me look like a monster to everyone that would listen. Also, some "neutral" people deleted/blocked me from FB and I didn't know why. All I knew is that I already felt so abandoned and alone that each time something like that would happen, it was like pouring salt into my already wounded heart.
Anyone have any opinions on this because I'm not sure what to make of it. I'm not trying to "keep the buzz alive" with the ex, I just want to understand why something seemingly innocent as a forgotten returned call/text makes me feel like I did something wrong.