Newly Submitted NarcSpeak

13 posts / 0 new

#1 Mar 30 - 8AM

Lisa E. Scott

Newly Submitted NarcSpeak

Wow, I received an e-mail from someone with some NarcSpeak for us to translate. I know I may not be on the board as much as I like, but please know I make it a point to respond to every single e-mail, FB and PM message I receive. It keeps me busy and by the time I check the messageboard, I see the Moderators and all of you are responding and supporting one another on a level that gives me goosebumps. Truly, the way you support one another is so inspiring to me.

This individual is not ready to post on the board yet, but she e-mailed me the following NarcSpeak that I KNOW many of us can relate to. With her permission, I thought I would share:

your behaviour would ruin any relationship

you've been bullying me

work has been like a safehaven for me - i don't know what i'm going to come home to... wondering where the next rocket is coming from

i've never been intimidated by a partner before

i don't feel safe in my own house

i'm not an emotional distorter - you are

is this the real you?

(after upsetting me) what's going on with you? you were so happy and confident a few hours ago.

i'm not the one with low self-esteem

am i refusing to support you or am i drawing healthy boundaries?

i've started to think that you're not who i thought you were

no-one's ever said that to me / done that / acted like that

i've never seen anything like your behaviour in my whole life

i feel for my ex - she tried to deal with me depression but she couldn't

no-one's ever been so understanding about my bipolar before

i love you so much more that i've ever loved anyone

i miss you more than i've ever missed anyone

i don't understand/have the kind of rage that you have

i would never treat a partner the way you've treated me

don't abuse your next boyfriend

have you been like this with your other boyfriends?

you'll find someone else... men love the look of you then you open your mouth and they love you more

i've seen photos of you when you were younger - you're much more attractive now than ever. you're exquisite.

i've got a lot to give, i'm just not going to give it here (ie to you)

you're abusive

you're a loose cannon

i can't live with your volatility

i'm sorry i took my self-loathing out on you... you're a gorgeous person

you'll never change - i've changed some of my BEHAVIOUR but this is your PERSONALITY

no-one's EVER said i was selfish/narcissistic before.... that's the funniest thing i've ever heard

life with you would be a constant battle

you have a revisionist version of history

i know you'll throw me into the dustbin of history but you've been huge for me

thanks for trying so hard to help me

(insert name here) did a lot of me when i was sick

sometimes i think you're brilliant and other times i think you're crazy

i'm not your man - you need someone emotionally and physically stronger

you've got a lot going on that's got nothing to do with me

you're a complicated person - you've been through a lot and anyone who meets you would know it

i've got a pretty good emotional read on you

you'll move on - you move quickly... you moved quickly with me and you'll do it again

during sex: me: 'talk to me baby' him: 'i'm busy' (!!)

#2 Mar 30 - 10PM

narcspeak

My xhN emailed me upset that I was planning to throw a birthday party a week after our daughter's b-day. (She wanted one with Mom & one with Dad.) I was "only exposing the chasam in our relationship". We are DIVORCED! I do not have to OBEY you anymore!!!

#3 Mar 30 - 1PM

dudette

hilarious albeit sick....

I shall add... I need space, it may be ten minutes, ten hours or ten days (I am pregnant with his child at the time) I never said "I need space", I said "I need time to think".... ILFU, no-one had ever F*ed me like you do, no-one ever will my wife is a neglectful mother and an alcoholic In principle I have nothing against the idea of marriage ( translate here - but not with you) I really want to kiss you - but I won't.... it's not you, you are beautiful, clever, we make a beautiful couple together and you never indulged me , add bullshit here. No it's me, I have my own doubts and insecurities ( again, I am pregnant at this stage) I cheated on you because we had only been together a few weeks and you were still technically married to your husband....she pursued me, it was not me. She was an emotional vampire (!!!) I am not sorry that I slept with her, I am sorry that you had to find out that way ( i.w by knowing I was out with OW that night and I even asked him if there was anything I needed to know cos I thought she had a crush on him....) It was only a couple of shags and the second one was a pity shag only. I did not want to dump her cruelly because she was disabled.... ( it was a one year relationship actually...) Now that I work with disabled people, my friends ask me if I am going to be F***g "cripples" ha ha ha ha ( turned out he was, told her it was because he wanted to know what he was like to F**c a cripple....)again not kidding you!!! Need I go on??? Monster or what???

#4 Mar 30 - 10PM (Reply to #8)

becsta777

Dudette

That last part about the cripples just makes me ill. I feel like the ex-N wanted me for the same reason - not that I'm crippled but that I was pregnant. I think he just really wanted to sleep with a pregnant woman. At least I waited till after I'd had the baby. Maybe he's still out there pursuing other unsuspecting pregnant women... These people are really just loathsome disgusting parasites slithering amongst us, but society largely refuses to acknowledge they exist. I just feel sick and angry...

#5 Mar 31 - 1AM (Reply to #9)

dudette

Becsta

Bec Sick and twisted and perverted beyond compare.... Mine got me pregnant as a form of control. We had 3 condom incidents in two years, just at the right time, with delays everytime and me getting in a right state about it ( I was still married). he knew me, he knew dates.... he used to say that he knew when women were fertile... He had a way to tell. I took it to be a birth control thing... bit oh no... third time he got lucky... but not for long... poor little soul.... Yours sounds just as sick as mine....unbelievable that some "humans" can be that way.....

#6 Mar 31 - 8AM (Reply to #10)

Susan32

Pregnancy&Control

The ex-Psych prof was obsessed with pregnancy, in an unhealthy way. He'd talk about how he wanted to get me pregnant... and yes, he claimed he knew when women were fertile. He idolized Leo Tolstoy, who got his wife Sofia pregnant not long after they married. He said women always abandoned him, but they wouldn't if he impregnated them. The ex-P was obsessed with what pregnant women ate, because of the research of Margie Profet (eerily, she recently disappeared in Cambridge, Mass-her disappearance is unsolved) He was so obsessed one of my classmates asked him if he were expecting. Not long after I went NC and left NM... he got his girlfriend pregnant. It's a bizarre coincidence that around 9 months after I left... she was giving birth. He saw pregnancy as some sort of science project.

#7 Mar 31 - 3PM (Reply to #11)

dudette

Susan

yes pregnancy is either a tool for control in their toolkit or an odd perversion... may be for mine it was both.... Over two years he had those condom accidents just when he knew I was vulnerable... I guess he got third time lucky! For some reason, My first reaction was to terminate it - really bad bad circumstances, my age and child birth record, it all worked against a good outcome for the poor baby...he said to me he did not want it either. I went ahead, alone..... Then the silent treatment began.... Weeks after the split, his ex wife found out about it and he had the audacity to tell he he actually had wanted to keep it.... she told me it was the best decision I ever made though. She has a child with him and she knows what kind of father he makes...

#8 Mar 30 - 1PM

It'sAllAboutMeNow (not verified)

Sounds about right...

That sounds about right!! Narc speak in its prime. Sounds like my ex in so many ways. I recall setting out to discuss something with him and leaving the conversation (if I was lucky that he would talk about the issue) not getting any questions answered and even more confused than when I started. It never made sense to me how that happened. I thought I was going nuts. She should join us because I'm sure the support is needed right now whether she's with him still or not.

#9 Mar 30 - 12PM

TLSM

TOTAL projection!

WOW. This is DEFINITLEY NarcSpeak! So familiar, so insane. This girl needs to come aboard!

#10 Mar 30 - 12PM

Smarterthanever

Many of these comments are

Many of these comments are exact things mine said or very close. Their minds all think alike. Mine has an excellent vocabulary and way of phrasing things that remind me of this guy. If you listen carefully you can see how everything they say has a hidden message meant to confuse, manipulate and control you. There is a frightening pathological brilliance to it all.

#11 Mar 30 - 9AM

jen79

oh my god

they are all the same. Projection! They steal our lines, and at the end you think you are the crazy one. Its too funny.

#12 Mar 30 - 9AM

Smarterthanever

Many of these comments are

#13 Mar 30 - 8AM

michele115 (not verified)

I was fearful that this anonymous individual

is my ex's girlfriend...every line almost exactly what mine said towards the end...of course if you were to ask him, he'd feign sudden amnesia but I digress...I was almost triggered when I read: i know you'll throw me into the dustbin of history but you've been huge for me Because I'm still traumatized over the dustpan incident and for a minute read dustpan instead of dustbin...Lord help me...BUT my fears were relieved when I read: you have a revisionist version of history the narc I was with did not have that expansive a vocabulary... I hope she's outta there...

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