New here....and so thankful to have found this forum/site

10 posts / 0 new
Last post
#1 Oct 20 - 6AM
Eliza's picture

New here....and so thankful to have found this forum/site

It may take a while to absorb all this amazing info and all the experiences that are has been 4 years of living hell and when I stumbled onto this site I finally saw some light at the end of this tunnel! Thank you all so much for sharing and I hope to share more of my story in the days to come.

Oct 20 - 7PM
betty2020's picture

Welcome aboard!!!! Please

Welcome aboard!!!! Please read the blog section and share story. Glad you found us!!! only one way to go...Forward (tm?)

only one way to go...Forward (tm?)

Oct 20 - 1PM
Briseis's picture

Welcome Eliza !!!

You are "home" :) Everybody here understands like you wouldn't believe :) I too look forward to hearing more about you, reading your story, and getting to know you :)
Oct 20 - 6AM
MsVulcan500's picture

Welcome Eliza,

By reading everything you can regarding N/P's, you will gain a lot of understanding. When I found this board and read people's experiences with N's was when it all really hit home with me. I remember reading books and thinking "well yeah, there's some of that, but not all," so I still wasn't sure what I was dealing with. After being here and reading real people's experiences I knew I really was dealing with a N, not someone who was just afraid of commitment. As you've probably seen no question is stupid or outrageous. If you ask about something, there will be at least 10 people saying "oh yeah, me too." NC is so important in recovery, it really gives you the clarity to think things through without N influence.
Oct 20 - 6AM
faithinthefuture's picture


I too stumbled onto this site. I actually believe God led me to it. I know without a doubt I wouldn't be where I am in the healing process without these wonderful caring and wise women. I no longer come home to an empty house. I come here. I believe out of everything bad something good happens. Coming here is one of them.
Oct 20 - 6AM
michele115 (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

Welcome Eliza

Yes, this is a wonderful family here...the absolute best. I don't think I would be where I am without them...still healing, but would have been in a much worse state without them. Looking forward to getting to know you better.
Oct 20 - 1PM (Reply to #2)
blueeyes's picture

Eliza, glad you made it here.

Welcome and congratulations on your interest for knowledge. I hope to watch u grow. I have never expierenced that before. I'm learning as well. We all end up here looking for answers. This is the place for support. I'm sorry you encountered such a person :(
Oct 20 - 5PM (Reply to #3)
Eliza's picture

thank you all so much

I have been reading and reading and reading....What amazing people you all are- whatever stage you are at with moving forward..I have identified with so many of you! I have been 4 days "NC" ( I downloaded an app that helps me keep track of how many days my NC "streak is!) It all started when i rc'd a text from him after yet again another bout of the silent treatment. He referenced some of our times together and again I was sucked in and engaged in texts. Ultimately ending in making a date to see each other. When he must have felt I had responded enough so he again ignored me....THEN i end up finding this site and reading all your stories it gave me the courage to text one last text. I no longer wanted or needed contact with him. I have said things like that in the past to him. I have said some horrible things to him in the past ( hoping he wouldn't want to see me again!) and somehow he "forgives" me and up it starts again. I see so much now...I am not out of the woods but I certainly feel the power to turn my back on him and all the years of tears and pain I have gone thru... not to mention my saint of a best friend who has listened and stuck by me- when i am sure she would have loved to have told me to shut up ( i do not know how many times she heard me say the same things over and over!) His story: Married very youung Never thought he wanted kids He and wife started to grow apart( she is so "simple" - his words) She had an affair ( he travelled ALL the time and I am sure a few affairs happened) So she was the bitch( his words)- but he made a conscious decision to concieve a baby with her- to save the marriage?? So when his son is 6 months old I meet him and he swears he told me he was married! Not so- but I had started to actually believe that "maybe he did tell me?" Oh my god I now realize I KNOW he didin'y- because I asked!!!!! 4 and 1/2 yrs later I am still on this roller coaster and he is still married to his so called bitch many details that fill in many many blanks. I feel like the floodgates opened and that i have blabbered on....thank you all again so much..... Eliza- which feels weird cuz it's not my real name but I liked it:)
Oct 20 - 7PM (Reply to #4)
MovinOnUp's picture

Welcome, Eliza. Glad you

Welcome, Eliza. Glad you found us. It is amazing how once you get your hands on the information light bulbs start going on and clarity isn't far behind.
Oct 20 - 7PM (Reply to #5)
blueeyes's picture

Congrats on the 4th day.

NC. That is awesome, and you have a counter! I will need that when my pscho goes to jail. Thanks for the idea.