nc..signals

11 posts / 0 new

#1 Sep 28 - 7AM

Used

nc..signals

I thought i would bring this up about NC, having been NC for 23mnths, you would think a narc would get the message, i know now that, a glance, a smirk,anything will make them think you are still intersested....
I have seen exnarc 5 days running, same dirty scruff he always was, same clothes on for the 5 days...when i see him, i either change direction,and he has seen this action, i dont go any where he goes, i dont so much as make eye contact with him...if i see him in front of me, i go another way,if i see him outside his fav coffee house, i cross over the other side....which brings me to the crux of the matter.....
yesterday, i was walking into a shop when he came in ,i ignored him, as always, i left the shop and he was behind me...i went to have a coffee, in a place he is/was/ banned...in he comes, i hadnt got my coffee and debated wether to go,when i thought no i have had enough of this...so i had my coffee and left...
i wasent out 20mins today and there he was[its alovely day here]...he sat on a bench facing me...bathed and everything he had on was clean...at first i thought surely he doesnt think b/c of yesterday,that i never left coffee shop, he thinks i gave him a signal...
YES ONE AND ALL, THATS EXACTLY WHAT HE DID THINK....
i finished my coffee and got up and left, he came behind me and said you look realy well used, i carried on walking, he then shouted, IF YOU WAS NOT INTERESTED IN ME STILL, YOU WOULD HAVE LEFT COFFEE SHOP YESTERDAY....
I stopped walking ,looked at him with such a look of contempt, that his lips went pure white...
i walked away, and will keep walking away, just wanted to let you all know, that they are so delesional...he realy thought i would talk again.....i must have been ONE HELL OF A GOOD SUPPLY.......HAVE A GREAT DAY EVERYONE...

#2 Sep 28 - 2PM

uk lady

Hi Used

Hey, it has been absolutely gorgeous today and still more to come so I hope that he doesn't think that just by sitting on the bench that that was even more of a come hither signal. Yes, they are definitely delusional and so full of themselves. I am luckier than you. My ex-P doesn't live in my town and we don't minger with the same set so there is absolutely no chance I will ever bump into him. I would feel gut sick if I ever laid eyes on him again and wouldn't be responsible for my actions. Only joking, I would probably just look him straight in the eye and turn my back and walk away. They are just not worth it. Is he still with the OW nowadays? If so, bet she would be really pleased with his carry on. Good job girl. Huge hugs. Dee x

#3 Sep 28 - 2PM (Reply to #9)

Used

uklady

yes, its a bench in a flower garden...lol, as for his ow, i dont know if he still see,s her, but he acted like this with me when he was in a r/s with her...she knew about me, i didnt know about her.....3summers ago he was stalking me, and had a breakdown.....his sister tried to get his friends too talk to him,turns out he doesnt have any... he followed me off the bench, i did just have a think while i was waiting for the kettle..lol, i thought if i had spoken back to him today and gone to the friggen park.84 degrees here, i would have got complaints and whinging and whining all day, not leaset cos i kept away from him for so long, but seriously, i thought, i wouldnt be standing in my kitchen....i would be totally suicidal, and i am not exagarating....i dont think i every came home[after h/mperiod] without thinking...i want to die.....

#4 Sep 28 - 2PM (Reply to #10)

uk lady

Absolutely

It is always about them. I know that if I ever speak to my ex-P again it will be all about him and tbh I am just not interested any more - let him rot in his own madness. He told me since we split in April that he misses talking to me - wonder why? I know. Because I was his sounding block and voice of reason, his nurturer in the absence of him having a nurturing mother because she is a N and taught him well. He doesn't miss ME - just my supply to him. He has taken enough of my life, like you with the men you have been involved with. Time for us to walk away and nurture ourselves. We so deserve it more. They certainly know who to target but I feel that once we absolutely "get it" there is no going back and we become so much stronger with the knowledge. And as you and I know, they can't accept that. I have never felt suicidal because I would never, ever, have allowed the b*****d to grind me down to that level but he certainly brought me close to the brink to insanity. You are a great woman and after everything you have been through I take my hat off to you. Dee x

#5 Sep 28 - 1PM

Done sourcing

The narc will say

The narc will say anything. You could get married to someone else, leave the country, delete all contact numbers and addresses, change your name, get a face lift, change your hair color, change your gender...and it will all be because you can't get over him/her it! Run into them in a coffee shop and sugar in my coffee means I miss the sweetness of her kisses! I am glad I am on a nut-free diet! ds

#6 Sep 28 - 2PM (Reply to #7)

Susan32

And it won't make any sense!

That's a great example of word salad. The last exchanges I had with the ex-Psych prof did not make ANY sense whatsoever. I'd repeat back to him what he said, just to show that what he was saying was contradictory and nonsensical. He'd talk about how fear&respect are the same thing... because in "War and Peace",characters who are feared means that they're also respected. Very twisted. When I spoke to the female manager of my Narc workplace (the one who hoovered me at the imports store a couple of months ago) for the last time, she didn't make any sense either. One of my former coworkers confirmed this when he briefly was at my workplace. She'd promise more help in the kitchen, all these wonderful things, didn't follow through. When this former coworker honestly told her that the kitchen supervisor was alcoholic&drinking on the nursing home grounds... he was the one who ended up in trouble instead of the supervisor. They will say anything, especially if it defies logic, reason, time/space continuum.

#7 Sep 28 - 9AM

Sea

Used

Thanks for posting this. I think u just answered my question abt how to deal with N if I see him again (which could be real risk at business functions). I would totally ignore him, no signal from me or he might try his luck again. Thanks!!

#8 Sep 28 - 10AM (Reply to #5)

Used

SEA

good thinking sea, and as i believe everything happens for a reason, i have had a lot of encounters with him, but not put them on the board...so this was serendipity, that i thought when i get home, i am going to put that on the main board for all members to see and hope it helps anyone... so THANKYOU AS WELL SEA, for making my day, by beign able to help......ignore them always, i cannot stress that enough, they must always be ignored...i will be thinking of you ...good luck..xx

#9 Sep 28 - 8AM

Hunter

Sorry you have this Assclown

Sorry you have this Assclown up your butt all the time!! Rock on!! Good job!! What amazes me still, you describe him to be such a loser, same dirty cloths, not allowed in the coffe shop, etc!! How in the world did we get involved with these losers in the first place! Two lessons are learned here... 1.NC is key 2. There was something very disturbed within us to take the bait of a narc in the first place!! The end result is rewarding, a whole self " it's all about us" Hunter

#10 Sep 28 - 8AM (Reply to #3)

Used

because, i never thought much

because, i never thought much of my self...i was dismissed in childhood, told to shut up, told i would never amount to anything....so tho to look at me, i walk the walk and i talk the talk....inside i am still that kid who thinks these SCUMBAGS WERE ALL I DESERVED.... i know diffrently now...and i will TAKE NO PRISONERS AGAIN...

#11 Sep 28 - 8AM

StudentOfLife

Wow!!

He is delusional. He seems to believe that he is supreme lord and ruler of the whole world including that coffee shop, Lol, lol!! YES!~ it is his world and his coffee shop, and his space.... and you were in it because of HIM HIM HIM!!!! oh my goodness!!!!

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