Narcbait's Story

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#1 Jul 13 - 9AM
Narcbait
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Narcbait's Story

My Story (A Very Condensed Version - But Still Long)

Hi everyone.

My name is Narcbait... I chose that name because I seem to attract them. I was with one off and on since I was young, and he's been the toxic narc. I'm fairly certain I married one, as well (though he's not abusive, merely detached and self-involved).

I met Narc1 when I was 19. Ironically, it's when I was finally feeling good, and confident, after a rough childhood/teen years. He swept me off my feet, love bombed me, wanted to be with me all the time... I was hooked, totally and completely. I thought I'd found THE love of my life. He wanted to marry me, and we'd have our happily ever after.

He was older, and had ONE MORE semester to go at school... so in the fall he went back to college. That's when things began to fall apart. Little problems cropped up, and the honeymoon ended. Just a few months later was the D&D. I was devastated. He kept calling for booty calls when he was in town, and I kept giving in... I wanted him back. I kept being his booty call until he got another girl (at school) pregnant. Then suddenly even the booty calls stopped.

Fast forward two years... I'm 21. There had been no contact for about a year when I caved and got his phone number from his dad (he was in the military and moved out of state). Turns out that in that year the babyMomma got an abortion and he moved on to greener pastures. He got engaged, and was supposed to be married in three weeks. Only problem? His fiance saw the light and cancelled the wedding.

I fell for his bull**** yet again. Oh, the timing was perfect, it was fate, we were meant to be together, the whole time he KNEW he should have married me, yadda yadda. Instant intimacy, like nothing ever happened. And oh, were his words sweet. I wanted to believe it so badly, I still loved him.

He was being relocated in just a few months, and didn't want to be separated from me anymore. He asked me to move with him, and be with him. After a few days of deliberating, I accepted. I put in for a transfer at work, gave my notice to my roommates, and started getting ready. He came to see me a few weeks later - drove all the way across the country. Then dumped me two days later on my ass.

The aftermath was hideous, but that's probably a story for another time. Lets just say I haven't been the same since.

The third time I got sucked back in was almost 4 years ago. We had emailed from time to time in the past, but Facebook brought it to a whole new level. We are both married (to other people) and have kids... I still can't believe I allowed it to happen.

We had a 3.5 year long online affair, and two meet-ups (physical)... one in his town, one in mine (opposite ends of the country).

During that time he played so many games, gave me the silent treatment so many times, flaunted his wife (and other women) in my face, and generally made me miserable. He only ever gave me scraps, but just enough to keep me on the line.

Supposedly his wife 'didn't understand him', 'wasn't his soul-mate, like me', and was 'frigid'.

I fell for it all.

He used me to be his cheerleader, telling me everything so I could uplift him - and I did. Every accomplishment, it was ME he told first, every perceived slight, me. He got off on my praise and admiration of him. Of course, he was never inclined to return the favor, waiting hours or days to return messages while he chatted up everyone else.

He used me as his personal online porn. The nameless anonymous stuff wasn't good enough for him, I guess. The power of getting someone you know to do it for you... a woman who keeps crawling back to you, and a married woman to boot? Heady, I imagine, for a narc.

I was blind to him. I thought he was truly my soul-mate, and I couldn't understand why GOD was making this so hard on me and not allowing me to be with him. LMAO! God. Yeah, right. In a way, I was saved. I still went through a lot, but at least I wasn't his wife... I probably wouldn't have survived the experience remotely intact.

And now, here I am trying to pick up the pieces once and for all.

Jul 13 - 9PM
Jenna H
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Narcbait....

Jul 13 - 10AM
cdngemini
cdngemini's picture

WELCOME

Jul 13 - 9AM
kpc
kpc's picture

We need Narc Repellent!!

Jul 13 - 9AM
Hunter
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Gotta love FB.. Welcome to

Jul 13 - 9AM (Reply to #2)
Narcbait
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Hunter, thanks! I think...