moving on
moving on
I am always reluctant to say...i am done with narc, but I believe I have reach that place.
ON 21st june, I blocked him ,his family and anyone who knows him from F/B..still kept saying to myself..you are just having a good day used!!!.
Time has continued and i still kept saying to my self, I cant be over him...but here I sit today and I know its finished..
YES he will always be a part of who I am, I know and accept that now...
I have had only 2men in my life..my exhn who I was married to for 31 years[since I was 16] and then the narc for 6.1/2 years..nothing will ever change that...but they are now my HISTORY.this board has helped me so much...helping me know my narcs..but more importantly, helping me to KNOW my self and who i am ,and why I GET INVOLVED..with these men...I saw him yesterday...it was 93degrees here[had a heatwave]..I had lovely summer clothes on ...he had a big army coat on[he has become so obese], but this time I didnt smile to my self and think loser.... I just walked on.. YES I know there will still be bad days...
STRANGLY ENOUGH....this could become a dangerous period for me, as when i no longer feel connected to him...I could actually say hi[I dont know if anyone can understand that] but when someone is unimportant to me..i can say hi...b/c they have no impact on me...but in his case I cannot afford to that.....HE HAD HIS CHANCE HE BLEW IT AND THAT I WILL NEVER FORGET...
I will never look at another man that way again....and i have no problem with that....even tho its been 20mnths nc...I have not looked at ,or spoken to a man[i didnt already know]....IT sounds grim but it is not.... I have now settled down to the life i have chosen for my self and am content with it.....I have had the chaos, fighting, destruction....now I live for the peace....that I have earned the hard way....love to you allxx
Congratulations, you really
BITTERSWEET
:)
Used, I am so happy
spinning
SPINNING
Glad to hear this
janine