Major Stuff UP

So.....I haven't broken NC directly. Just a FB stuff up. Not good, not good at all and I feel I have gone backwards so much.

He has declared that he is in love with OW - 2 weeks after meeting her - said all sorts of things he NEVER said to me - yes he was amazing at the charm and the seduction with me and I recognise that the N has different approaches for different targets BUT the pain of seeing the words. He told her he only ever felt like that when he met is ex wife 15 years ago. So the last 3 years with me meant blip.

I am so cross with myself for even being tempted to look but it was like a drug - now I feel ashamed, totally back where I started and like a complete stalker! This is not good people, HELP!

Why can I not just let this horrible man go?