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Low tolerance for stress

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#1 Jul 15 - 11AM
GhostBuster
GhostBuster's picture

Low tolerance for stress

I was wondering if anyone else that has been NC for a while and the PTSD symptoms have lessened experience this. I find myself having trouble dealing with even moderately stressful situations that are completely unrelated to my ex N. It's like I have a very low tolerance for stress anymore--whereas I used to be able to handle quite a bit. For instance, when there are stressful situations at work, I just tend to get overly affected by them or I mentally "check out" (I think to help myself cope). Is this normal? Are we forever changed? I know there has been much said about practicing a gentle life. If I had the wherewithall, I'd move to a beautiful island so that could happen 24/7. But life (at least most of the time) doesn't always allow for gentle living.

Jul 16 - 3AM
liselotte
liselotte's picture

beta blockers

I was on beta-blockers for a year... The stress affected my heart rhythm.
Jul 16 - 10AM (Reply to #9)
quietude (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

stress

Wow liselotte, unbelievable what being exposed to these people costs us physically. I'm back and forth, some days I'm so releived that he's out of my life..and I'm so glad at the end of the day, I can drive home and know the evening typically will be BULLS*** FREE! Then there's days I'm totally stressed...maybe there are triggers that come up, and I get so angry that I now have to rethink so many aspects of my life...and the damage he left behind. Physically, mentally...the toll...sigh. The effects are so far reaching, I think we must be super women/men of sorts to be able to endure this and still keep going!
Jul 16 - 8PM (Reply to #10)
liselotte
liselotte's picture

Quietude

In the beginning I didn't even want to admit that it was because of the relationship. God, I was soo in denial about everything... I just thought it was something physical, but once I was out of the relationship I'd sometimes forget to take the medication and noticed my heart wasn't pounding in a weird way anymore. What more evidence to you need? You know, I sometimes think; it's not strange he's become so callous. If he had to endure this in his childhood, the only way to survive is to become untouched by all the abuse. His father truly is a monster. It brings tears to my eyes thinking about that...
Jul 15 - 6PM
RenewD
RenewD's picture

stress

I deal with this as well, my tolerance for stress was so low, someone could just look at me sideways and I'd go into a rage. Almost 2-1/2 years out and I still have a very low tolerance, but because of kids I have to stay in contact. I also find it extremely difficult to focus on anything, my mind is just all over the place. I almost feel like I have adhd. I have been on antidepressants for about 5 weeks now and I definitely have been much calmer. I can deal with things way better than I could without them. I tried taking the over the counter diet aid thats a cortisol blocker, I think it was Relacore? I didn't see much change. I didn't lose weight, I was only a slight bit calmer. I don't know how much different that is from the prescription type.
Jul 15 - 10PM (Reply to #7)
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

RenewD

because cortisol is just one hormone in the chain of anxiety and PTSD... i.e. - low stress tolerance. Focusing is sometimes hard for me too. A little take-away present from THE THING(s)! ~~~~~~~~~~~~ Articles & information for abuse victims - Updated Daily Online Coaching for Victims of Narcissists/ Psychopaths
Jul 15 - 12PM
Carolyn
Carolyn's picture

You have a reaction to the

You have a reaction to the stress hormone cortisol. there is a medication called anti-cort that supposedly limits cortisol in your body. You aren't forever changed but altered. your nervous is allergic to stress. think of it like a food allergy only in your case it is an emotional allergy. You can eat shrimp, have an allergic re-action, then you have trouble with shrimp in the future. It is like that. Try deep breathing when you feel the stress, do some stretching. Make your mind and thoughts work for you when you feel the panic think of your 'island' the subconscious does not know if you are really there or not. Get a book on controlling stress, go on the Internet, talk to a stress counselor or nurse practitioner you can learn to control these re-actions it will just take some work.
Jul 15 - 4PM (Reply to #5)
quietude (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

carolyn

Hi, I may look into that medication. I am concerned about my levels, my stress has been off the charts for obvious reasons, and what adds to it is I'm having to make some big life changes. Have you heard how effective it is??
Jul 15 - 12PM
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

stress

This is still PTSD. I had this for years afterward. Every once in a while if just one stressor too many comes up - I get the shakes and buzzing in the head that came with my PTSD. Are you in therapy? or on an AntiDepressant? The latter helped me tremendously when this started happening years later. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ Articles & information for abuse victims - Updated Daily Online Coaching for Victims of Narcissists/ Psychopaths
Jul 15 - 3PM (Reply to #2)
GhostBuster
GhostBuster's picture

Thanks

Thanks Carolyn and Barbara. I am in therapy with a psychologist but not on an antidepressant. I go to therapy once a week and my therapist says she prefers her patients not take antidepressants if they don't have to. I asked her about them a couple months ago and she seemed a bit surprised that I thought it might be a good course for me. At that time, I was pretty stuck in depression mode. But she didn't offer to prescribe. Can a psychologist prescribe meds or just a psychiatrist? Maybe she can't. I'm not as bad as I was when N first left or even two months back. But I do feel I still have some times where PTSD rears its ugly head. I do have breathing exercizes for the high anxiety times and that helps. But in times of work stress I do now get headaches, blurred vision and just generally feel drained and like I need to run away from the people/situations creating stress. Or just try to go to my "happy place" when stress hits. But since I'm often in charge of fixing the situation or dealing with it in a higher profile way, escaping to my happy place isn't going to impress the higher ups at work.
Jul 15 - 3PM (Reply to #3)
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

GB

that's odd - your therapist can NOT prescribe antidepressants. A psychiatrist or doctor can. Something low dose for the short term might help you until you start doing better. Personally your therapist is dead wrong about medication. I fought medication for years and now I am sorry I did. It has helped me tremendously in coping. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ Articles & information for abuse victims - Updated Daily Online Coaching for Victims of Narcissists/ Psychopaths