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The littlest things

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#1 Dec 31 - 10AM
Blythebloo
Blythebloo's picture

The littlest things

Yeah i probably shouldn't have but I did. I got the narcs other daughter who is 6 and who I grew quite fond of a Christmas present. I gave it to the narc to give to her. This morning he is sending me pics of her with the gift and it appears she is trying to thank me for the gifts the way she types. Do I acknowledge her thank you? I know this is small stuff but the pics set me back because obviously they are taken in a strange house (the ow). I don't want to ignore her but I'm afraid of my acknowledgement the narc will text back.

Dec 31 - 1PM
Hunter
Hunter's picture

You gave her a gift but know

You gave her a gift but know you think you should ignore her?. Is that nice to play a little child? You need to acknowledge the real reason the gift was given.. A gift of supply.. Hunter
Dec 31 - 1PM (Reply to #6)
ruby01 (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

Hunter

Ouch! You don't mess around. In my opinion, you are correct, as usual. The abuser and all that are a part of his world must be left behind.
Dec 31 - 1PM (Reply to #2)
Blythebloo
Blythebloo's picture

Busted again by hunter!!!

I see that now. I know why I initially hesitated in getting her a present. I did acknowledge her by sending her a picture of the lizard she loved that I have as a pet. Nothing was said to the narc. Just her. But yeah, supply it was.
Dec 31 - 3PM (Reply to #3)
Hunter
Hunter's picture

Unfortunately, you must leave

Unfortunately, you must leave nothing attached to him behind.. :( Hunter
Dec 31 - 7PM (Reply to #4)
Blythebloo
Blythebloo's picture

Damn narcs ruin EVERYTHING

Damn narcs ruin EVERYTHING for us kind hearted people. I don't like the idea of it when children are involved. I love his other daughter like she is my own but I fully understand why I need to leave it all behind and quit being nicey nice to anyone that is associated to him.
Jan 1 - 12AM (Reply to #5)
Isabella B
Isabella B's picture

Blythebloo

Yes, everything has to be left behind. It is not a normal relationship...I learned the hard way. I tried to keep up communication with ex N's three young children, but it was not healthy too. I visited a few times and ex N ignored me like I wasn't there and kids would see it. Also, kids were confused - Dad doesn't want her around, but we do, and she does, but dad doesn't want her around...what did she do? Why is she here? It was BAD all around and VERY PAINFUL, because ex N and I told the kids I was going to be their mother (they lost their mom 2.5 years ago). And I LOVE children and wanted to be their mom so much - he also used the kids and my love and attachment for them to hurt me. It hurt like nothing else, and I cried everyday because I missed them so much. Boy, did he torture me with the kids and eventually, I knew I had to cut all contact not only with him, but his kids too. Now, it's easier for me and they have OW as new mother now. A mutual friend said the oldest daughter said they have a new mom now. HARDEST and MOST PAINFUL lesson I've learned. It's easier now, but if I could do it all over, I would not get involved with him or his kids. They looked so "normal" at the start and then they changed by the third or fourth month - a lot of loving they all needed and believe me they took, took, and took. He was the awful one. Anyway...he doesn't care how kind-hearted you are...I know from experience. Be strong and don't feel guilty about it.