Knowledge is everything .....lucky escape :-)

A fabulous day to you all!!!

I have been a member of this site for a long time (not posted for ages) and it has helped me significantly in the recovery from my two narc attacks one of them being psycho and beating me badly. He has from time to time tried to get his foot in the door but I am very good at cutting him off now. The knowledge it has given me has been golden as now I have an understanding that in fact I am a fabulous prize and these types of guys are just what they are but of course when you get caught up with them it is a painful and soul destroying experience.

Just recently I started dating a guy who seemed very nice. Oh he was gushing all over me at first...lol....Had two lovely dates and one not bad one where he had sort of 'cooled' off but I think that was because he wasn't getting his own way with me.

The day of the third date he text me saying the FSA had come into his work place for an audit and he may have to reschedule with me as would be working late and wouldn't finish until after 8.30pm. I was off course understanding and asked if 8.30pm was too late to meet to which he replied he was exhausted and would need some rest. When he text me at 8.40pm to say he was just leaving work I text him to go get some nice food and get some rest. Then next thing I know it's 9.30pm and he is calling me and trying to hot foot it to my home. He was actually on his way!!!! I of course told him to turn round and go home...I'm not a booty call for Christ sake we are dating not in a relationship yet and I thought he was exhausted..not so tired now then was he ....and my youngest child still lives with me which is irrelevant whether my child lives with me or not you can't just turn up.

He relied heavily on text messaging for contact,(crumb communication)which in my book is a bit iffy plus I'm not a teenager. Some of the text were 'I am always on form if you behave' and once when I was posting music and photo's on my Facebook timeline I got one at 11.45pm saying: 'I see you have been up to no good tonight'.

He continued with the texting for a couple of days then on the Friday I got a text after he had finished work saying 'hi can you do massage'...oh pur-lease! As you can imagine our text and phone conversation didn't go very well that evening even though he had invited me over on the Saturday he had a hissy fit and on the Saturday made some lame excuse that he was waiting for the cleaner to come then text me at 9.15pm to say that the cleaner didn't come I text back she/he was probably out partying..lol. Then next text he was going to grab some food. Then I was getting text about how low he was feeling and his week-end had been utter rubbish with no thought about how he had let me down...little did he know I was out having dinner with friends. At least I've learned that much...don't wait around.

The texting continued for a couple of days and then he said would I like to go for dinner, this is the one thing I regret about this scenario as I went and should have not because I already knew what he was about. But on the bright side it has shown me that I still need to do work on this area of myself and I'm not upset about this guy and I don't take it personally. I have dined out on this story and had a good laugh about it. We went for dinner and the next day his son came to visit for two weeks whereby I got endless text saying he missed me and how will I cope with his burning desire, he was missing me soooo much yada yada yada...I had 200 text from him in those two weeks...lol probaly some of them round robins.....he must really believe all the jokes about blondes.

On Saturday I went for a picnic up in London and then to Camden Town for drinks in the afternoon. He was supposedly taking his son back to Manchester by train from London...he text me asking how the picnic was and that he was just on his train back from Manchester. I told him I was in Camden and he then text me back saying he was just driving passed Camden and would pop in and say hi if he had time. ????? how can you be on train coming back from Manchester and then 5 minutes later be in your car driving past Camden Town in London?? He eventually turned up and was checking out and looking around every where to see who I was with. He stayed a record breaking time of a minute and told me to call him when I got home.

I decided to call him that evening(I shouldn't have) but he didn't answer the phone so I txt him to say you were rude to just leave like that and that he had upset me etc. It was confusing. I got a text at 12.45am saying 'Just woke up' and I haven't heard from him since.

But the crafty bugger hasn't taken me off of Facebook. I know I should just take him off as he is probably keeping his eye on me and they do sometimes try and make a comeback so I should take him off so part of me isn't healed or learned about the other two because as much as I am not upset about this guy I do feel a tiny bit shaken or triggered I think the word is. When I meet someone I go into it with a open heart and looking to have fun. Do you have to be forever cynical and wary in this dating game or are there nice guys out there who are not just looking for a shag/ego stroke/shoulder to cry on/quick fix...I'm the eternal optimist and this happy outlook has carried me through many a rocky time and I don't think having a man is the be all end all but even I am beginning to wonder... are there any nice guys out there??