Keeping Pretty

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#1 Jul 25 - 12AM
Kelly
Kelly's picture

Keeping Pretty

So important. . .

I haven't been feeling too great this week. Last night, I gave myself a mani-pedi and today I got my hair done. I felt a million times better!

Usually, I would get all dolled up for the guys I was dating. I wasn't doing it entirely for myself.

Now, it's for me!

I'm making the decision today to stay pretty for myself.

Jul 25 - 1PM
wholeagain
wholeagain's picture

It's nice

to take care of myself in ways that make me feel good inside, not in ways that he wanted. It's fun to figure out what that even is! What is it that makes me feel pretty all by myself, or walk taller? First thing I did when I left was use those strips to whiten my teeth. A little brighter smile made me feel great.
Jul 25 - 12PM
smileyfacepr
smileyfacepr's picture

I still dont

I still dont feel pretty or sexy like I used to when I was w/him...I look in the mirror and think..ughh!! Havent gotten there yet!!

smileyfacepr

Jul 25 - 12PM (Reply to #11)
Kelly
Kelly's picture

Hey Smiley

I know what you mean - It was nice to have him tell me how beautiful I am. Thing is . . . I never really needed him to tell me that! So important to treat myself as often as possible. I'm feeling blue - time to revamp! Doing nice things for yourself when you are feeling bad is so important. It's an instant feel good. It's all baby steps . . .
Jul 25 - 12PM (Reply to #12)
smileyfacepr
smileyfacepr's picture

Hey Kelly

Yeah ur right..baby steps..and I do try to do lil things that make me feel better..its just my brain says..for what? Im not intrested in being intrested in anyone, I have never run into him, Im home all the time, I hope its another phase and it will pass..Im glad ur doing it...xoxox

smileyfacepr

Jul 25 - 3PM (Reply to #13)
Kelly
Kelly's picture

That's the reason I wrote this post

I started thinking of myself as Elinor Rigby :) What's the point right? Well, when you push yourself to do something - - anything - - that makes you look a little better on the outside - - It does make you feel a little better on the inside! Lisa, you are so right! When you have clutter in your apartment, you feel it. Pushing yourself to de-clutter is the first step to helping your brain de-clutter. Same goes for your looks! And lemme just say how freeeeeeeeing it was to do my hair! I did it in a way I was afraid to do because I worried the guys wouldn't like it. It was nothing drastic. I just highlighted and glossed it. I was just always afraid of stepping away from my natural color. Now I'm having fun.
Jul 25 - 8AM
helldweller
helldweller's picture

Kelly

I've got my dress on, my makeup on, my heels on. Ready to strut out the door, necessarily past him, looking fabulous! Everyone, everyone should take a cue from you and make sure to respect how beautiful we all are and not let them take that. Have a beautiful day, beautiful!
Jul 25 - 12PM (Reply to #9)
rainbow1
rainbow1's picture

I never leave without a

I never leave without a dress and heels on! I have been exercising and tanning. He can eat his heart out when he starts work on Monday!

_______________________________________________
"dont let yesterday take up too much of today"

Jul 25 - 4AM
Scoop
Scoop's picture

For a couple of weeks when i

For a couple of weeks when i first went no contact i couldnt eat and i became stupidly thin and ill but slowly i began to eat the right amount and exersise and i got my hair done and i have been siting round the pool getting a wicked tan and now i just look the dogs bollock ( a phrase for the brits and the aussies this morning .. enjoy lol ) I also feel that it is realy important to keep youre home looking good , i get so much pleasure from buying flowers and candles and little bits and pieces ,i have just moved in to a flat by the river in cambridge and i am loving the peace of the enviorment and river life , i going to buy a narrow boat and im moving myself on to the river to live with my cat ! Its such a huge adventure . My greatest fear is falling in the river (the cat will i recon but he will only do it once lol) My friend has a boat so i am moring it next to his for a while , i visited his boat on the coldest day of the year last winter and it was toasty warm so that fear is layed to rest , the rowers wake you up at stupid oclock in the morning but thats ok as i get up early anyway . Fear and excitment are the feeling . i think its so important as we heal to make plans and to keep our self looking good xx
Jul 25 - 11AM (Reply to #7)
Lisa E. Scott
Lisa E. Scott's picture

Great point, Kelly!

Great point, Kelly! It's so important for us to take care of ourselves and our homes. A clean organized home makes us feel as though our life is in order. A messy home makes us feel out of control and confused. Well, at least I know this is the case for me. Scoop - Wow, your upcoming move sounds so exciting!!!! Sounds like a dream to me. I'm so excited for you!
Jul 25 - 8AM (Reply to #2)
helldweller
helldweller's picture

Looking good

Scoop, holy crap how fun does that sound! Yes, looking good is really, really important. I make sure I do not leave the house without my little dress and heels, sexy makeup and hair, shoulders back and smile on. He will not get one minute's pleasure of me in sweatpants and flip flops because of him, no way. Everyone who knows me knows I wake up and get dressed up every single day, and I won't let him think he cracked that.
Jul 25 - 11AM (Reply to #3)
Kelly
Kelly's picture

Dogs Bollocks

Lolololol! I love that! There is an image in my head of what I want to look like - ( don't worry, not some superficial unachievable image.) I just want to exude confidence in everything I am. My hair, my clothes, YES! My apartment! It doesn't have to be expensive - it just needs to look expensive! I'm expensive! I'm valuable! For so long, I've been feeling like a used piece of worthless tissue.
Jul 25 - 11AM (Reply to #4)
Janet
Janet's picture

Oh yeah. I moved too

Oh yeah. I moved too recently --- to the coolest apt in Berkeley (in my opinion). Last year, after leaving I was in a depressing little place for about 10 months and most of my furniture was in storage. New place has tons of light, high ceilings, all my books and furniture and is in a great neighborhood (can walk around the block to cafes and grocery stores..) For the last year I have been working out even more than before and must say...it pays off. I am 49 but bought a string bikini and felt pretty darn confident in it swimming whilst camping. Have been keeping up on my highlights, mani-pedis, new clothes... OH, and I (with another teacher) took 16 kids to the UK on over spring break this year. Am directing a play for the SF Fringe Festival in September. Have gone out to small clubs to hear musicians... I have to admit, like it or not, my life is WAY better without the sociopathic, narcissist, soul destroying creep! WOW - good morning everyone! Peace. J

Peace. J

Jul 25 - 11PM (Reply to #5)
Lisa E. Scott
Lisa E. Scott's picture

Love it!

I love what everyone is doing for themselves. Janet - your new place sounds amazing. I love what you say here: "I have to admit, like it or not, my life is WAY better without the sociopathic, narcissist, soul destroying creep!" And I love how freeing doing your hair the way you wanted it was for you today, Kelly! There's lots to celebrate about about being free! We have to remind ourselves of these things. They really add up and make a difference! xoxo
Jul 26 - 12AM (Reply to #6)
almostlydia
almostlydia's picture

I don't ever want to have to

I don't ever want to have to dress the way I think I have to dress to keep some idiot from looking elsewhere. If I want to wear sweat pants, drink beer all day and watch football, without trying to impress, that's exactly what I'm going to do. The fact that I can also dress up like a million bucks when I go out ought to be enough. I am me today in sweatpants just like I am in sequins and 3" heels. And someone that can't see that, is too shallow to deal with anymore. Especially someone that walks around in sweats all the time or jeans with chlorox spots:)

almostlydia