I've messed up

well after him not inviting me to his 40th I haven't heard from him today wasn't good day I text him saying I have a present for him (which I don't ) and asked him when he's free so can give him
His present I just want him to see me so I can tell him I know everything but he's ignored me feel stupid mad at myself and crying I only lasted 3 days nc what is wrong with me it's like I had to do it felt like a junkie when will this get easier :/(