It is a choice

There is only one way out……..of this labyrinth of emotions……out of this downward spiral of emotions….and that way is NC.
I have been reading many of the postings on the site and it has grieves me to hear how so many of you are struggling so hard with NC.
NC, as we know all know by now is not about him, but about you.
About loving yourself……caring for you…….
When did it become ok to be degraded by someone you claim loves you…….to be called vile names, treated like an sex toy………to be physically abuse………….when did it become ok with you to be treated this way.
When did it become ok to treat this person still in a loving way, after all the abuse……….
Who‘s approval are you seeking? Approval from an abuser? Really!
When did you decide that you deserve this type of treatment?
Now you are on this site, your eyes are being open……..and I know everyone is on their own journey.
I know that many of you want the narc to acknowledge he was wrong, and that he is a narc.
But even if he did, even if he miraculous changed (which he never will)…………You will still be left with a hole inside yourself……you will still be empty inside.
He cannot make you whole, there is not anyone that can……this is a journey you must take for yourself…..until you love yourself there will always be a boundary breaker is your life.
If you are looking for that one person…..to totally accept you and love you………it will not happen till you love and care for yourself. When you do……you will not allow a toxic man in your life.
NC is the only way to detox……you have let him break all your boundaries with yourself……that now you have no boundaries……no boundaries to protect yourself …..so you answer his call…..google him……create fake accounts…..etc……..he no longer has to play with you….you are caught in this web of playing the game by yourself…..
Lisa, the mods the ladies and the men that have made it through, made it through going NC.
So grid yourself up……and begin to really fight for yourself…….strengthen yourself you knowledge and truth …….choose to come out of denial…..
It is a CHOICE…….
Choose yourself……..