I met a new guy!

Take it slow.. Start asking questions.. What's his history.. Divorced.. Engaged .., etc I wouldn't go gang busters but drop subtle hints.. I'm a big interviewer freak for my dating friends.. Like " hahaha.. What was you last dream"? If they say they don't dream run like the wind.. Part of dating is getting to know the other person.. Proceed with caution but have fun at the same time.. Hunter

That's sound fantastic! I am so happy for you! You know, for your worry. Of course with the knowledge you now have, it is good to stay aware. But, I still think we need to have faith in life, in good people. Love Winter

Good for you. Enjoy yourself but stay aware. Dee x

CONGRATULATIONS....JUST PLAY IT BY EAR FOR THE TIME BEINGX

experience, it's you! Your posts over time have reflected how strong you are, how much you've grown, how far you've come and how committed you are to carving out a happy, life free of chaos and confusion... ...that being said...don't create any chaos or confusion where there is none. New guy likes you because you are smart, strong, funny and sexy. Someone liking you is not a red flag. Someone smothering you, calling constantly, texting constantly, asking what you're doing and with whom at this early stage and commenting on your lifestyle--that's red flag territory. Going out for dinner or coffee or cocktails and having light conversation, sharing thoughts about current events or job or kids experiences is GOOD! The key is to take it slow slow slow. Do not expect new guy to be all things to your life, just as you don't want to be all things to his life at this early stage. For what it's worth, Lil, feeling like a teenager again dating post-disordered one is something I felt and still feel a little bit, too. There are really great, nice, non-disordered, fun and HOT men out there and the key is to NOT BRING YOUR BAGGAGE TO THE TABLE. The key is to steer the ship. Accept his kindness and if he begins triggering you or smothering you, talk about it in a kind, non-argumentative way (that is if you care about the person and want to have a good, honest relationship). I like that he's a "grown up." Grownups are great, in my experience! I love someone who takes control of their own life and is comfortable in their own skin...don't you? So think of that in reverse...this guy is loving how you are now in control of your life and comfortable with who you are...comfortable enough to give him a little good night smooch! It's sweet! Go with it! You're not going to be walking down the aisle any time soon, right? You're just getting to know each other. Keep it light! I say all this because I've been through it. When I went on my first date with a really great, hot, NON-DISORDERED GUY, I went home and sat at my table and cried feeling so much like damaged goods. I never thought I'd hear from him again. I never thought someone so great could like me...guess what...that was eight months ago and we still see each other and it's still really GREAT. The key is to evaluate what it is that you want and desire and to nurture that in yourself. It will be evident to others, including this great new guy, who will take his cue from there. Lilly, I hope this helped some. I, too, am rambling...it's because I know your exact feelings! I am 54 and not a centerfold...but guess what...when you are happy and filled with light, you attract people who are happy and filled with light, too. I am so happy you are attracting someone who is nice and kind to you and who you like! Go easy with it...have fun and feel good about how it's going... Most sincerely, (not) spinning. AND IT FEELS GREAT!

Darling Lillymarch sweetie, I am wishing all happy things for you dear...it is nice that you have met the new guy..but..we will wait for advise from the Forum Seniors to give guidance. Sounds so warm and fuzzy...but I am awaiting inputs from our sisters and brothers here. Glad you shared this experience.. I feel so happy for you.. and yet I am feeling we must be a bit cautious too.