I feel like absolute crap

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#1 Jan 6 - 6AM
I_am_free
I_am_free's picture

I feel like absolute crap

My head is reeling...yes I know what he was...an ugly ass Narc and I know he lied and lied and lied but it still hurts like hell when new stuff comes to surface :(

I feel sick to my stomach and cant stop crying. I so badly want to send him a few messages telling him he is a sick pig but whats the point...

I want to crawl into a hole right now :(

Jan 6 - 9AM
TNR1
TNR1's picture

Hey I am free...I'm sure you

Hey I am free...I'm sure you have read this elsewhere on the forum. The problem with contacting a Narc is that it simply gives them Supply (yes, even Negative comments). NC sends the N a big F U message. Best thing to do (as I see you have done) is to journal it all down. You will want that journal for times when you wax sentimental or when he tries to reel you back in.
Jan 6 - 8AM
I_am_free
I_am_free's picture

Definately 2nd choice! I

Definately 2nd choice! I wrote down what Im feeling and probably used the word F#### at every alternate word but I feel better. Thank You :)
Jan 6 - 8AM
I_am_free
I_am_free's picture

Thank You...I am trying...so

Thank You...I am trying...so hard. I think I need to tell his niece to pls not tell me any info re him cos it sets me back and today's info she gave me just made me sick Its like I am frozen and cant move. My daughter needs my attention and I cant even smile.
Jan 6 - 8AM (Reply to #5)
janemarie
janemarie's picture

You may have to distant

You may have to distant yourself from his family and friends to prevent this type of set back... I had to do it with friends...they kept giving me daily reports....they respected my wishes and Im back to speaking with them again...but any dialog about him is Taboo.....If they are true friends they will do anything to help you....if not...bye bye!!! I dont speak to his family at all anymore...unless I see one of his kids (but thats different,,,they are innocent)You are not a part of his life anymore....so his family should disappear as well (unless you have kids with him). You dont owe them anything... It's all about YOU now and what is best for YOU and your daughter..
Jan 6 - 8AM
janemarie
janemarie's picture

Read my "Straight from the

Read my "Straight from the Narcs mouth post" No matter what you text...nice or not...they take it as a compliment... Do you want to compliment him and make him feel good??? Then text him..contact him Do you want to tell him how much of a scumbag he is??? Then ignore and erase him from your life What's your choice???? Im guessing you will opt for my second choice...Im hoping you will!! xoxo
Jan 6 - 8AM (Reply to #3)
Laughs Last (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

that helped

I was SO tempted to text a scathing "i know what you are" etc., msg and I read your post above and you stopped me. I am trying to drill it into my head that the WORST THING you can do to a narcissist is ignore them. Any tirade is a source of NS, they simply do not care if you think they're a scumbag, they know they are and are proud of it - they think we're the weak losers for having feelings and being gullible for believing them. Feel for that poor OW, you were the OW when he ditched the last poor victim, we all were. My N's OW has my sincere prayers, she might be walking on air over his constant texts, calls and compliments now, but that girl has no idea what's about to hit her and I remember too well the heartache of my first D&D from N and I don't wish it on anybody. Stay strong IAF, and I'll try to stay strong right along with you! hugs
Jan 6 - 6AM
walking_on_sunshine
walking_on_sunshine's picture

noooo

Fight it sweetie, it will pass. And when it passes you will be a little bit stronger, and so thankful that you didn't give in. You deserve better. Telling him off is giving him supply, it will make you feel worse, not better.