Help!This made my cog disonance be so bad

I fell for that. I paid the $35 for the ebooks. And some more for some "steps" or something. I thought she gives good advice about how to self-soothe when your npd partner acts abusively. She makes good points about how to avoid fighting. The problem is that narcissism exists on a spectrum, with some affected more or less severely than others. I think her husband, if he is "cured" was most definitely only mildly affected. She also talks about how to get the police and family services involved. She lives in Australia and was able to get some sort of restraining order wherein he's allowed to live at home but if he steps out if line, he gets arrested in one phone call. We don't have that in the U.S. And even if we did, it would mean my partner is "behaving" only because he doesn't want to get arrested. Not because he's a changed man. And if her hubby was more cerebral, he'd have figured out a way to call the cops on her and have her arrested. I think her method would only be successful with mildly affected somatic types with shitty jobs who depended on their spouses for $. (like in Kim's case.) The best thing I can say is that if you follow Kim's advice and don't react when they are trying to trap you into becoming upset, it will cause him to escalate. If you continue go this route, the narcissist isn't getting supply from you and will leave you. But you'll know you did your best and at that point, there are no more What Ifs.

I had googled my exN's symptoms and realized amybe a year ago I was dealing with a N. We also did counseling and that was a BIG joke and then I stumbled on the Kim Cooper crap and tried it all...he is not cured. It got worse, I got worse and then finally Thank God I found this forum. This is where the real help and advice is! I only wish I had found this forum a year ago instead of finding that Cooper crap. I still get emails from them and I treat them just like the N's. DELETE!

when I read about that couple. Don't waste your precious life on someone who doesn't want to change. I tried everything to help my exN. I pushed all kinds of help in his face, and begged and cried, and spent hours online looking how to fix him to the point where I felt physically sick. On top of that, it only made him despise me more and respect me even less. I used to line-things up for him...places he could go to get help, people who could talk with him, treatment centers...we even went to a counselor together. What a joke that was!! Whats the point of going to counseling with a manipulative liar? There are some things that just can't be fixed in a relationship. If the person is continually dishonest, if they don't care about your feelings, if they're not loyal... Its your choice. I understand because I had a NEED to try my best, and try everything I knew to make it work before I gave up. I just didn't recognize how hopeless it was for some reason. The more I let him put me through, the more bitter I got though. He will never care how much you do for him. He'll never be sorry for causing you pain, everything will always be about him (never you), he'll never be truly comitted to you, and he'll have no problem letting you give and give till you're just a worn-out bundle of nerves. Then he'll call you an old nag and go off with someone new. They're cold, cold hearts and so far Ive never seen one of these change. Sorry. He has already shown he's not serious about you. Dont take it personal, they never are with anyone.

That couple............I have seen the video a number of times. Found it very curious. They are a load of CRAP. Two narcs, profiting from others pain. How many people do you think bought that book and video..................thousands of people I am sure. They are illusionists, just like the men/women that we were with. Married narcs, studies show, can actually compliment one another. They might as well be those healers that roam the country, slapping people in the forehead, curing them of blindness, paralysis, etc..............or the guy during the drought that sells a potion for rain. All the farmers went broke buying it, it did nothing, they had no crop and no money. Don't buy into things like that. If it sounds to good to be true, IT IS!! Stay strong..................

The exact same thing happened to me..... i saw this couple on youtube and started to question myself exactly as you have. What you need to do it STOP WHAT YOU ARE DOING!..... and listen to your gut feeling don't get confused with the "what if".... be true to yourself and put a stop the emotional abuse the only way up is out.... we must get out. The answers are most certainly here, and the more we read on the disorder.... it truly is not curable.... what will happen is you will be the one fixing everything.. all his faults and all of your supposed faults it will soon be turned into "your the one with the problem". I stopped watching this youtube couple.... to be honest i found them to be very weird..... my gut was telling me there was something very fishy. I found this man to be extremely helpful i have watched every single one of his videos and he definitely helped me to see the light...... hopefully his videos can be of help to you. I have posted a video below, he's blunt, honest and straight to the point. Thinking about giving him a second chance? watch this- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QKClN8rnj4o&feature=related Stay strong.... you will be better off without him.

This http://kimcooper.wordpress.com/narcissism/ is her blog. Read a few comments, is this the life you are wanting???UGHHHH I bought into reading her stuff when I first realised what was going on, Not anymore. This pic of them makes me think of her sitting there clueless while he makes love to the camera http://www.narcissismcured.com/narcissism.html

I didn't watch this video. But I can tell you that anybody who claims that they can cure narcissism are scam artists turning a buck on the hope of the broken hearted. A personality disorder cannot be cured. The disorder is the fabric of their being. Psychiatry & psychology do not do much for those diagnosed with personality disorders because there is no cure. Once there is a realization that the patient suffers from a PD, the doctor will try to get rid of the patient somehow. Often the newest intern on the block is given the PD. Now, we ALL have 'narcissistic traits' to one extent or the other. We who do not suffer from personality disorders have self-awareness, self-reflection, and remorse. The Prodigal Son is a story of a person who had narcissistic traits & then learned his mistakes. We all have hope & belief that we & others can learn, change & improve ourselves. But we shouldn't 'project' our beliefs onto a Narcissist. This is how Narcissists operate. They use our normal human emotions. Our projections that they are normal -- but they are not -- and they exploit us. Oh. Mine was big into therapy as well. It was a means to an end. He was getting something out of it. And mine was good. Even had the therapists in 'family therapy' fooled. Go to family therapy to keep her from leaving. Therapist as proxy abuser -- getting the victim to take 50% responsibilty for the dysfunction which was 98% a result of his abuse. Please. Narcissists can also become psychiatrists and psychologists. I kid you not. They -- the sick ones -- become the definers of your health. The irony of it all. Pathological. The successful ones are very twisted. Maybe these internet people selling the cure for Narcissism are narcissists themselves. Hey. Sam Vakin, the eminent narcissism expert, is a self-proclaimed narcissist. Go figure.

All I can say is: Are you kidding me? Seriously do you know of any Narc or Psychpath who first of all thinks they have a problem, wants to change, and is going to allow Super Kim to change them?? And even if for some strange reason they wanted to pay these two to "change" them, they would still be a liar and a cheat and a Narcissist or Psychopath. Nothing those two do is going to change who and what they are. This is a personality disorder and once again, what Narc do you know who would even want to go to these two? I know of none. It is the person in the relationship who wants them to change not themselves. They see no reason to change. Why would they? They can treat people like crap and have sex whenever they want it and with whoever will have them. They also have others taking care of them. Sounds like a nifty set up for them. What would be the reason for them to want to change? They expect YOU to change because everything is YOUR fault not theirs. The couple in the video look to me like they are looking to make a quick buck on the impossible. I bet the only people who would go to them is court appointed couples and this is ONLY if the court system would allow them to go to experimental therapy. Then as soon as the court appointed therapy was over they would stop going and of course everything would stay the same. God bless, Goldie

First off... You DID NOT give up too easy. Secondly..I'll stick with the myriad of trained professionals who have said countless times that Narcissism cannot be "cured" This video is nothing but a marketing tool aimed at shattered souls that are looking for a miracle. Oh yeah and you have to pay them for their "cure". Paypal!!! That's nice.... And I'm sorry but it's a kind of creepy video too. They both look/talk like they are on something.

I have seen this dynamic pair. First, how many Meds is this guy on.. Second, who the HELL wants to stick around to find the cure.. My opinion..it's Bull Shit.. Hey .. Miracles can happen .. Hunter

blogs and information here and other legitimate information about this disorder, you will find your answer. Knowledge is power. The truth is right here. One thing there is no question about: The person you were involved with is a liar and a cheater. Enough said. Most sincerely, (not) spinning BECAUSE I KNOW TOO MUCH TO SPIN OVER ANY DISORDERED FREAK, OVER ANY ONE

Could they both be narcissists seeking supply ? I think so I don't go there anymore. I thought I could cure him by loving him and sacrificing myself to please him buthe just continually raised the bar higher. It's so hard but ultimately we all have to get to the realisation that they cannot be cured and to cure the damage they have done to us we have to go nc. I've had a really hard time accepting this