HEARTBROKEN !!!

candy, dont cry, i wish i could hug you and tell you you deserve more.....dont be me, still crying twenty five years later, and more so because he went back to the ow after being apart for about five months, he went back to her, and told me it was my behavior, that was the reason he went back to her....how sick.......he was going back to her regardless........as for your asshole, if he cheated on her before, he will cheat on her again, and if she is only one of the many exes, then she is just many of the ones he will use to make you jealous, dont let him know you care, dont be me, be strong stay nc and when you go out pretend you dont give a shit about anyone but you, hold your head high and walk like you own the world, dont be me, i walk with my head down and try never to leave the house, thats stupid, im letting them win, dont you let them win, you win for the both of us.....xoxo

You really have to try to remain NC. I know that it is very hard to do but you only hurt yourself when you have any kind of contact with them. The N/P that I am married to and currently getting divorced from recycled me so many times in the past 25 years that I couldn't even remember if we were together or not. This is what they do. They recycle all of their ex's. They are so predictable. I was hurting so badly that I went NC before i knew what NC was. All I knew was that as long as I let him in my life on any level I would remain miserable. Only you can save yourself from this misery. Please Keep trying and give yourself a chance, you won't regret it!

They are always off with some other woman, ending one throwing them away like they were garbage and on to the next, its their pattern. he will throw her away too they change women like my disposable contacts, about every two weeks I would imagine, ha ha That is why you have to let the bastards go, and never let them recycle you, I am not trash to be recycled, he wont even get a deposit back from me, he threw me away and he will never get me back NEVER. Let him recycle all the rest of his x's I know it hurts but they are not worthy to be with another human being.

LET HER HAVE HIM!!! He is not your problem any longer. He no longer has the power to treat you poorly, to gaslight and confuse you, to cause chaos in your life. He brings you nothing but PAIN. Please try to shift the focus off of him and what he's doing. WHO CARES? I know it hurts a lot but if you try to think of all the negative things he brought to your existence you will see things more clearly. I did this a lot early on and it really helped. Make a list. Write it down. Look at it. Be truthful. The 'bad' list I made was four times as long as the 'good' list...I'm sure your's will be similar. Candy, you are a good person. Loving, caring and very special. He's a hollow jerk who will keep repeating the same behavior over and over and over...yuck! How boring is that??? Hold your head up high. You will be a much happier, healthier person soon. He will not. It's as simple as that. He's just recycling supply... ...concentrate on what you need to feel better right now; read Lisa's latest blog about why we obsess...it's excellent and filled with helpful information that I think you'll benefit from. Hang in there, Candy. You have done very well so far. There are good days and bad days and it's part of the process. I know you will feel better once you shift the focus off of the disordered one. most sincerely and with a huge hug (think I've stopped) spinning

Oh Candy , it hurts so much that someone you love so much turns out to be as shallow as this . is there any pain greater than that . see the narc abuses us , pushes us as low as we have ever been and then tosses us away ... What you have to do is cry it out and that takes time , you have to turn it round on him , he is the sick one not you .. my goodness they are sick . Read as much as you can about the conition . I can tell you one certain and that is he will never be happy , and he WILL do what he did to you to ANY other woman who is unlucky enough to fall for his fake charm . We know the truth about them and in time the ow will too ... the secret is with theses guys is in time and i mean a long time they loose their mistique , when you come out the other side they become very small and we are here to take you though the journey . big love Scoopx

Keep in mind that every time you, we, they go back to the Narc, it continues to get worse than it was before. Since she is an ex, how long do you really think it will last with her before he D & D's her again? Be glad it's not you getting your hopes back up, only to be trashed worse than the last time... and try not to take it personally, although I know it's hard. Hang in there and don't give in to torturing yourself with thoughts that she's better than you, or got it made 'cause she's back with him, or that he's happy. He's screwed up and she will be heartbroken like you when he dumps her AGAIN, and he WILL, when he recycles another ex. Hugs to you. xoxo

How can you move on? Stop snooping for starters. You need to understand the dynamics of a crazy man!! He is crazy BTW, Once you understand this man is very sick you will find yourself able to move forward! Besides star at the walls, what have you been doing to keep busy and stay NC? NC is your only option. Idealk