Healing for me

So I have been NC for about 2 weeks and broke up with my Narcette about 1.5 months ago. This weekend I ran into her at a club with what I believe to be her new girlfriend. Anyway, I was on my path forward and that just sent me a few steps back. In finding ways to heal, I decided to volunteer at a hospice. I met with the volunteer coordinator today and got the volunteer packet, in which, "Gone from my Sight, The Dying Experience" is included. In reading the packet, this part struck me the most, especially coming out of the Narc Relationship:

""How we approach death is going to depend upon our fear of life, how much we participated in that life, and how willing we are to let go of this known expression to venture into a new one. Fear and unfinished business are two big factors in determining how much resistance we put into meeting death."

Not to harp on death, because trust me- I have a fear of death from childhood baggage, BUT, the point is, if we spend this life focusing on the narc, we are not LIVING. I know this is easier said than done, lord knows I am still trying to de-program myself, but I have to tell you, being selfless and listening to stories about people who are very real because they are facing death without masks, it really got me to think less of my Narc and more about what truly matters!

So yes, I am going to go visit my friend in LA, maybe take a surfing lesson, do a 10K even though I may walk the whole damn thing, try to save my money and buy a plane ticket to Hawaii, maybe go climb the steps of Machu Piccho while having some Malbec wine in Mendoza, you know!

I mean, read this and then tell me that you wouldn't want to book the next plane ticket somewhere special for yourself where you can enjoy all of life (you know, because we can actually FEEL enjoyment, passion & LOVE!)

http://dying.about.com/od/thedyingprocess/a/process.htm