he has reached f**khead status

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#1 Apr 27 - 9PM
grossot
grossot's picture

he has reached f**khead status

This email from him stemmed from him trying to con me again out of getting my stuff. I had had enough and emailed this:

"Wow! Narcissism is so interesting. You really should read up!"

I know I shouldn't have but ever since the court appointed psych report his characteristics as being narsissitic and histrionic, I've been dying to say something about it. His response was "don't act like you don't have major issues.

And I in turn replied, "U r the cause of major issues in my life and Narcissism is not an issue...its a disorder". So I get this:

From the official f**khead:
I'm not the cause, i told u how unhappy i was, but nothing was ever good enough, u treated me horrible. and now it's my fault that u act the
It's not me, ur parents raised u, and couldn't u see i was unhappy, i didn't want more kids with u, u don't find that odd
These issues have been with u all along, do u remember how u put me down when i was serving our country, u were not a good wife, and i was not
But i'm a great father, u can deny what ever, but deep down u know i am"

I swear I am copying and pasting word for word his stupidity!

This is what ya get when you respond. NO CONTACT!!!!

Apr 28 - 12PM
sanctuary
sanctuary's picture

Sometimes it sooo hard not

Sometimes it sooo hard not to say something back to them. They are all cut from the same cloth. My daughter heard her dad tell the Psch Eval doc that maybe he wasn't such a good husband, but he thought he was a really good father. Duh! So that's why your own daughter hates you?! I'm curious too about the diagnosis affecting the kids. I'm praying the Psch Eval for daughter says the ExN needs an eval. The Doc alrady told us the problem was NOT with my daughter.
Apr 28 - 8AM
AnotherPath
AnotherPath's picture

Grossot I was wondering did

Grossot I was wondering did having a psych report change contact for your children with him. Was there an outcome in respect for him being diagnosed, did it make a difference? Ta

Ending the dance

Apr 28 - 6PM (Reply to #17)
grossot
grossot's picture

anotherpath

I was pleased with outcome of psych eval. Doc recommended I have resdidential custody however we did not change the amount of time she sees asswipe. It took a long time for the doc to make her decision. Also to no fault of the doc it has been a hell of a long time between her decision and when we go to court for the judge to finalize everything. Overall I'm glad I did it. It was expensive but N will prolly have to pay 1/2 back to me! I am an advocate for psych evals. I was worried that N would pull one over on doc but she saw right through his acting. Most of all the report was validating for me. Said he was capricious, N, and histrionic. But there was no evidence of him being a bad father. I know better. http://hubpages.com/hub/Married-to-a-Narcissist?preview nolongercontrolled
Apr 28 - 6AM
narcnarcwhosthere (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

sounds like plagarism...........

wow....that is almost word for word the same kind of crap the psycho used to send to me.......'YOU are the X factor here'.....yeah....the psycho was also a 'good guy'.and 'nothing was ever good enough' for me either...not the drunkeness or the beatings or the verbal abuse...just never good enough....bastard..... i did that too....brought up him being a Narc and a Psychopath...but of course he would just say....'this sounds like YOU...not me...i've done nothing wrong..' it's maddening...
Apr 28 - 6PM (Reply to #15)
grossot
grossot's picture

plagerism

I know. They must pass a class in N101 entitled, "How not to be accept responsibility while f**king with someone's Emotions" Very skilled techniques learned in this class. http://hubpages.com/hub/Married-to-a-Narcissist?preview nolongercontrolled
Apr 28 - 5AM
TexN (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

These dumb f***kers

They all use word for word! Heard that one already. They are all WIRED IDENTICAL!
Apr 28 - 4AM
AnotherPath
AnotherPath's picture

Wow how's that for total

Wow how's that for total PROJECTION, not taking responsibility, playing the victim and blaming you,.... He really does need to read up about narcissism, of course he won't though. Classic, how hilarious. And as for "great Dad" Narcissist make appalling fathers, I mean who wants that as a role model. I loved your emails to him and that it's official he's DISORDERED, he'll hate that, I'm still laughing. Bloody well done grossot

Ending the dance

Apr 27 - 10PM
hope4me
hope4me's picture

so typical

I heard those exact things from my ex. I was a bad wife, it was my fault our marriage ended, I screwed up our life, I failed to give him attention and affection. It's all your fault while they only focus on me, me, me and their needs. God when I read all these posts I swear they must all read the same book. It's amazing.
Apr 27 - 9PM
quietude (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

nasty little b-tard

Ohhhh, I missed that! He was DX'd that way?? Cool! That must have been validating!!! grossot, typical...you say potAAAto, that say patahhhto..always the same old crap with an N. They peel off blame like a bad sunburn. Nothing ever sticks to them, nothing. No matter who says it, even a professional. That's why it's useless even trying, even if it temporarily helps you feel better, in the long-run, they'll make sure you feel worse for standing up to The Great One!
Apr 28 - 8AM (Reply to #8)
better off
better off's picture

Haha quietude! If my narc

Haha quietude! If my narc said that to me I would laugh. The best way to belittle any man is to f**king laugh at him. Laughing at a NARC is the best punishment of all. While you are slamming the door in his face. Buh bye. Anyway your post reminded me of a book I saw in the store the other day... just saw the cover. It was called "You Say Tomato, I Say Shut Up." Made me laugh out loud. Thinking about their blah blah blah... yeah, just shut up.
Apr 28 - 8AM (Reply to #10)
quietude (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

better off

LOL, that is hilarious! Yes, isn't funny how the person we used to cherish, hang on every word...we now think of in this way? Reading my ex's e-mails after a while, it wasn't even outrage, surpise, or sadness, it was just totally seeing through the act, and as you described...'Oh, just SHUT UP for gawd sakes'! heehee
Apr 28 - 8AM (Reply to #9)
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

better off

"You Say Tomato, I Say Shut Up." This is my new motto! LOL ~~~~~~~~~ Moving Forward: Coaching for Victims Pathologicals Feelings buried alive never die. - Alice Miller
Apr 27 - 9PM
Amazed
Amazed's picture

Just do it,,no contact

Action will speak louder than any of your words. Don't put Narcissism in his face, it is wise enough for you to know. You know his games, and his deception tactics. Don't go there. Put is in his face, and you become helpless. Arguements have to be avoided with those who are pathological liars,,seek the greater good, within yourself.
Apr 27 - 9PM (Reply to #2)
neveragain5
neveragain5's picture

Don't you just love how they

Don't you just love how they turn everything around a say that you treated them horribly?! There isn't a thing on this earth that will get through their thick skulls.
Apr 27 - 9PM (Reply to #3)
Susan32
Susan32's picture

Totally understand

When I declared my feelings of love for him... he berated me, reduced me to tears in front of my friends. He claimed that I had embarrassed, offended, and disappointed him. I was the one who was all three. He didn't mind that I was enamored of him, but it was the "love that dare not speak its name." When I found out, 3 months later, he already had a fiancee, I honestly congratulated him, wanting him to be happy... and he claimed he was "violated", that I was "intrusive." He acted as if I had violated him. When I told him to go be happy with his fiancee since he couldn't be happy with me... he claimed I "disrespected" him, that I had "lowered him to my level" and that I was the one with the "low opinion" (of him). Apparently, I had degraded him by treating him as a fellow human. By comparing him to one of my recently engaged male friends, he took it as an insult. WTF????
Apr 27 - 10PM (Reply to #4)
neveragain5
neveragain5's picture

They don't like to be

They don't like to be compared to anyone. They think everyone is beneath them.
Apr 28 - 5PM (Reply to #5)
Susan32
Susan32's picture

Well, it does explain why his social equals avoided him

Usually, people say,"When assessing a potential mate, see how he treats those socially beneath him." For example-is he kind to cashiers? Does he thank waiters/waitresses? That's the usual acid test. With the ex-N,he treated his own social equals--those of the same standing (colleagues,coworkers) with contempt. One of them, OLDER than him, dared to call him by his first name instead of his surname, and my ex-N ignored him until he was called "Mr. T.---." He managed to drive away his own peers,which is very odd. Some narcissists can at least rely on a social circle of their peers/coworkers as their cheerleading squad,and treat their underlings with contempt. My ex-N seemed to lack peers. He didn't like teaching graduate school because the students were his age peers (if not older) and often had lots of life experience. Very sad. Sometimes, all you have to do to set a narcissist off is call him by his first name,and treat him like a human. The fury is his guilt talking.
Apr 28 - 5PM (Reply to #6)
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

NEVER TREAT THEM AS IF THEY ARE NORMALS

http://narc-attack.blogspot.com/2007/07/danger-of-ascribing-normal-human.html ~~~~~~~~~ Moving Forward: Coaching for Victims Pathologicals Feelings buried alive never die. - Alice Miller