he got married

No worries, chicken. Our wedding photos also looked absolutely fabulous and yes, we were both so happy on that day. I bet his ex felt the same way when she saw all my photos on FB. Our album is currently gathering dust under the coffee table and I will not be taking it with me when I move. Things look great in pics and remember these guys are consumate actors. They can really look the part but no one can keep up the act forever. The mask starts to slip. As hurtful as it is, just be grateful it's not you anymore. He won't be happy with her either. The relationship did not work because of HIM, not you so being with another woman is not going to make him a decent person all of a sudden. He's going to make his wife just as miserable until he leaves her or she leaves him...or he continues to make her miserable and she stays because of kids while cheats on her all the time. Good riddance!

I'm reading this thread and I have to say!, you are sooooooooo lucky this isn't you. Think of what. Mess thi girl got herself into!! 22? Seriously!!! When I was 22 I was dating my narc for the first time, we had no interest in marriage, I was living and enjoying life, Finshing college, thinking of a career and traveling!( Of couse his mother made him dump me..) that said, I bounced back then an I bounced back now. This girl is a stepping stone for this idiot, she's a bug and he will squash her! Hunter

I know how you feel! Three weeks after I broke things off with CharlieSheenWinning, he got married. I found out through a mutual friend. He only *knew* the chick for 3 weeks -- hooked up with her the day after I broke it off. These guys are nuts. They jump at opportunities and (I hope!) regret it later. You're in shock now. The real hurt may come later, but don't be afraid of it. I tried to block the real hurt I was feeling and nearly had a breakdown. (Okay, I *did* have a breakdown -- a bad one.) {{Big hugs}} If it helps, you aren't alone in your situation. Narcs seem to follow a quickie-marriage pattern to someone totally inappropriate. They aren't known for making good decisions, after all. Better her than you!!!!!!

Narcs love the young ones--someone they can control, inexperienced with sexual relationships, easier to mold, considers her a prize, what an ego booster. No surprise here!!!

Wow, I feel SO MUCH for you right now! I did the same thing. Checked. Mine got married too, to a rich, young, beautiful woman. He changed his WHOLE persona for her. Unlike others here, I wonder if he's changed, because he took himself off his dating site too. I guess it just depends on how much the supply is "worth" to them. I wish I had some words of comfort for you, other than to tell you that I hope you don't look again. I made a commitment not too now that I know. It's very VERY painful and I completely understand what you're feeling right now. I try to keep in mind, that marriage doesn't mean to them what it does to those who can love. A pathological doesn't marry for love, but for alterior, unkind, evil motives! One of the things that is so hard about it all, is to look at photos. I wanted to die when I saw my ex's new wife. She is stunning. She is also pregnant now. All within five months of having started dating! UGH! Photos are nothing but lies though, if you really think about it. It's surface dirt, really. We all smile for photographs, right? That's ILLUSION when it comes to the pathological. Did you and your ex have photos of yourselves together? What did YOU or any of YOUR friends see when they looked at those? It's just a snapshot in time, honey. It's not the WHOLE picture, which is reality, lived day to day. Hang in there!

I am sorry you’re suffering through this right now. You are NOT the disordered one. I thought of this yesterday…similar to what Hunter is saying…that they often find women who will tolerate more than we did. I say…go for it baby! Lol I look back, I was not crazy for wanting better treatment. Neither were you. You seem like a rational thinker, like most of us here…on top of that, we are giving and kind. We gave to them, and no, we’re not perfect. I am not saying I was a saint in the relationship, but I know this. I didn’t treat him as he treated me. That said, I know that they truly don’t change. That core narc center is always there—perhaps, he has found someone willing to tolerate it. How about women who stay with men who beat them daily? I know firsthand how hard it is to break things off with a narc/psychopath…and so once a woman is locked in for a while, she fears leaving him. This new woman of his may fear leaving…may also like that he is unstable. Some women like unstable men because they feel wanted and needed. We simply don’t know the dynamic between these two…but rest assure, it’s unhealthy. I say this because there’s no way a true hardcore psychopath/narc changes for another person. If anything, they keep seeking to find someone who will bend to them! I will pray for you to soar past this, very soon. It hurts right now, and not that I want this new woman to suffer. I don’t. But, I also know they don’t change. My ex has plastered on his FB according to his friends, his new gf. They also discovered that he still has his dating profile very much active, on a dating website. Touting that he is ‘looking for a relationship.’ Haha See? They don’t change. They just find women who will tolerate more.

Another one, WTF?? He got married to someone willing to take his shit!! There is something in it for him trust me! Better her than you. Think of the mess this woman got herself into. You are free to be you! Hunter

I am so sorry. This must be difficult news for you. Just remember, this is not, nor will it ever be, a real honest to goodness, happy union. It can't be, he is a narc and she is his new supply. Someday, you will read posts that are quite different then the ones you are reading about how great of a couple they make. She is his next victim........ Stay strong!

Broken oh baby I know how much this hurts. You are in shock, yes, because you had no real warning. You have been kept in the dark by him literally. But I want to tell you something that I have posted on here before and I am not proud of it but I tell you to help you and I put my pride aside to tell you. My ex N married and told everyone she was the love of his life. when he and I were together he was SO besotted with me that he proposed every day in between his rages and INSANITY. He told me there was no one else for him but me and that we were destined. I was pregnant when i found out that he was marrying her, but he and I had split up years before his engagement to her and I knew it was coming. He and I work in the same profession. So, I fell apart anyway even though it had been quite awhile since he and I had been an item. I never stopped loving him and hating him. I did finally when I had my second child. In any case, what I want to tell you is that in between kids, I had an affair with him, not once, but several times, and this whole time he was married to "the love of his life". And when it happened it was like he was drinking a glass of water...no skin off his back. I of course, was a COMPLETE nervous wreck. I still loved him desperately, couldn't say no to save my life. I was still SO hooked, so addicted. I later found out that he was sleeping with so many OW in his community right under his wife's nose that it would make your stomach turn. So you are sick over your ex N getting married, but listen to my story and take it in. They do not change and marriage does not mean they are in love. They cannot love. Your ex N's wife is supply to him same as my ex N's wife is to him. She gave him the social standing he desperately needed in his particular career and she is a beaten-down, insecure woman who knows her husband is cheating on her and she doesn't care as long as he stays married to her. BROKEN THAT IS NOT YOU! You have gotten out of this mess with him THANK GOD! See her as your savior, not your enemy! He will destroy her so badly it will make your head spin. You must trust me because I lived it and saw who he was after his marriage. He cared nothing for me, nothing for her, or anyone else as long as he was getting what he needed. I am sending so much love and we all love you and you are going to get through this. Just watch. P.S.Broken today will be the LAST DAY that you have access to any pictures of him or her. You must take that step and stick to it. You are not being serviced anymore by beating yourself. You must committ to blocking yourself any access to photos or information. No Facebook, no other sites. this is it

broken23, please let me know if he got married after splitting from you..or did you quit... were you the wife or were you a girlfriend/OW? I am asking because...my Narc-Psycho husband of 20+ years has plastered his fb page with pictures of them together... and their friends commenting on how lovely they look as 'business partners' and the worst part of it all is.. i am still helplessly stuck here..living on his dole as his legally wedded wife... He is now practically married to OW. spends 2 weeks with her and then 2 weeks in this house. Shucks..I cant even believe I am living through this... Not a single relative or friend left in my life. When a woman is victimised by a Narc through an innocent traditional family approved marriage...is it inevitable that she ends up losing every single contact in her life???? I am helplessly watching Bigamy.. I cannot report this to any law enforcer because NH is a celebrity..nobody is going to heed my cries..if I open my trap..i risk getting killed by NH

I'm sorry Broken, this can't be easy. Just remember HE IS FAKE, HE IS DISORDERED, YOU ARE BETTER without his narc-ass! They may seem happy now, but we all know it isn't real love he feels, she will discover it too one day. (((((hugs)))))