He is "disabled"...

Ok, been a long time. Hi everyone.

My ex narc husband, owes over 47,000 dollars in child support. He has had no contact with our two boys(thank GOD!) He has been extradited for criminal non support four times! The last time being in July. Oh yes, you should have heard the way he tried to woo the judge and his lawyer. He promised to pay, was supposed to serve six more weeks and then released. Of course he said he had a job waiting for him in California when he got back, and him and his new wife...(her 48, him 35) would set up payment arrangements. This is his second marriage since he left seven years ago, after ours...heck, he got married to the second wife while we were still married. Ok, back to my point. The night after court, I was laying on the couch watching tv and heard a pounding at my door at eleven thirty. I opened the door and it was him! He was released for no room in the jail. I hadn't talked to him for years. I started shaking. I could smell alcohol and saw dried leaves all over his shoulders. He raised his voice and asked why I was ruining his life and throwing him under the bus. I told him I wasn't...that he did it to himself and all he has to do is comply and pay child support. He told me that he had to talk to me. I told him there was nothing to talk about to go call his wife and go to the job that was waiting for him. He said "Fu*& ____" (his wife)and the job. He said that he was a has been and all washed up...then he proceeded to say that I was his wife and we had a love from God and the fact that I show up to each hearing show him that I am still in love with him and we are meant to be...(UM, I was told by the DA to go and represent my case.)He would swing wildly from that to how pathetic I was and how crazy I was and that he never cheated on me or beat me and that I was crazy...long story short, I was caught up there, starting to believe that maybe I hade made up everything that happened in our marriage and that I was crazy. BUT, thank fully, my 13 year old son, had the head on his shoulder enough to call my friend and have her husband escort him off the property. I didn't see him again. Almost a week later I got emails from his wife saying that "throwing him in jail is not solving anything and that I was obsessed with him" etc, etc and that his family thinks I am crazy and she has heard stories from them etc. I very logically responded and you all would have been proud. I pointed no fingers just kept that point that she knew nothing of what went on and she was only hearing half truths, made up lies etc to make my ex look the victim. She maturely responded with STFU YDB etc. Nice! I haven't heard from hear either since then, but I do assume since she works at an investment firm and is thirteen years older than him, that she must be his sugar mama...BUT THE REAL POINT IS THIS!

Looks like he has found a loop hole to get out of his responsibilities AGAIN!!! Well his family has money so they can hire him a lawyer to insure that fact. My DA informed me that he is applying for SSDI on the basis of mental illness? UM, yeah, sure. Well he did do drugs for many years, (probably still does) but he is a npd'ed individual first and foremost. Looks like he will be getting them too. AND...GET THIS, the amount he will get will be almost equal to the Family Maximum allowed and after his wife gets some of the benefits, there won't be any left for my boys. OR A VERY MINIMAL AMOUNT! AND--then the state can't go after him for child support anymore because since he is "DISABLED" he can't work, and thus, cannot pay or have child support garnished from his wages.
I AM SO SO SO MAD! Here I am busting butt to make ends meet, while he has lived it up all over, having his parents wipe his rear, and send him to Hawaii or wherever to "start over." I just want to send a scathing email to them all! ARGGGGHHHH. This just isn't right. NOT AT ALL! But of course, they would probably all laugh, because, of course, I am the source and reason behind why their son has had all the problems he has had. Thanks for letting me vent. Any advice or comments would be appreciated.