A Harsh Lesson Learned...

I've been reading a lot on here from folk who are experiencing the pain of NC and struggling with 'missing' what they thought they had with their N's & P's. I was nearly 6 months of wonderful peaceful NC (albeit with wobbly moments - but on the whole a lot better than being in Narcville!) Thanks to this forum, I stuck to the letter and congratulated myself on being so strong... I had a feeling that the hoover manouvre would no doubt occur, but felt ready to face it head on... The thing is, these bastards don't want to give up - they need your supply and are incredibly manipulative - for emotionless freaks, they seem very able to tap in to the true emotions of others and use this to get what they want. This happened to me - I fed the Beast and now I am back to square one. There is only one positive to be gleaned from this - I know first-hand what hoovering is now and it is no joke, believe me. It's NOT about teaching anyone 'a lesson', it's about getting our lives back and that takes real strength & courage (& support from people on here, who KNOW...)
I feel a lot better for getting that off my chest & although I know I effed up at least I can hold my head up and face the path ahead with renewed faith. Knowledge is hard but it's the only way to face your demons. love to all. Flo xxx