Fixing himself???

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#1 Oct 29 - 10AM
needing2know
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Fixing himself???

This question has been an my mind for a very long time, when my ex D&Dd me 3 and a half months ago he told me he had to FIX HIMSELF! we all know they cannont be FIXED, so what the hell does that mean?, so was he actually telling me I had to be fixed?? Or didi he just need to get himself back together to get that mask back in place??

Oct 29 - 3PM
Journey
Journey's picture

Maybe he's getting a

Maybe he's getting a vasectomy so he can't reproduce cause he KNOWS he's an emotionless reptilian narc!

Journey on...

Oct 29 - 1PM
Deidre40
Deidre40's picture

lol At the end of the day.

lol At the end of the day. Don't date a guy who says the words...''I need to fix myself.'' I'd be running for the hills. To me, this is a weak man. No more weak minded men need apply. ;) It's not attractive when a man says this. It's weak. It's wimpy. Good that he can admit his short comings, but the words...''I need to fix myself.'' Sorry, that's weak. You could send him anonymously, a package of bandaids...you know, to 'fix' himself. lol I'm bad.
Oct 29 - 12PM
Tigerlily
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Maybe he meant

he needed a fix? !! Love Tigerlily
Oct 29 - 1PM (Reply to #14)
needing2know
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Tigerlily

yeah he needed a fix of something! REALITY would be nice lmao think he got a dose of that when for once in the 7 yrs I finally didn't go after him lol cause I was the one who always did! he never did! Oh well good for me sucks for him, I want to be with someone who deserves me and and respects me , i will NEVER lose myself again for no man!
Oct 29 - 12PM
onwithmylife
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needing2know

Like yours mine said in aletter to me once, he was the happiest with me, that i brought him so much joy and happiness, because i was always an upbeat, positive, funny person and he has been depressed for over 20 years.He at the end wrote me and said i was too exhausting to be with, this after he moved to another state, translation meaning he did not want to wear his false persona anymore, it was too exhausting to keep up...initially before I knew about NPD, did not understand what he meant, since i was not even living with him and he had left to move away, so much i know now...............ps how is the new guy?
Oct 29 - 1PM (Reply to #12)
needing2know
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on with my life

So far the new guy is great! Doesn't come across as TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE! Very respectful and seems to have EMPATHY! wow what a difference!. He is total opposite of what I dealt with . I have seen no red flags at all! lol And trust me my eyes are WIDE OPEN lol but it feels great to be with someone who is respectful and actually doesn't feel HALLOW you know what i mean? but taking very slow and enjoying our time together.
Oct 29 - 12PM
Sparrow
Sparrow's picture

Some, not many, but some can

Some, not many, but some can or will acknowledge that there is something "different" about them, but rarely will they admit something is wrong. People that suffer from personality disorders can attempt to fix themselves, but without much success. It takes years and years of therapy, an honest effort, and the key would be to accept. Most don't get fixed because it is more than likely, the hardest road to travel, and they just don't want to make that investment. Again, VERY VERY rare, but it has happened. More than likely, him proclaiming to want to fix himself is a load of manure. To appease you, I wouldn't believe him. You have a better chance of winning it big in the lottery or being struck by lightning twice.
Oct 29 - 12PM (Reply to #10)
needing2know
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sparrow

The thing he needed to fix, was getting out of the relationship so he no longer had to put on his act! i am such an outgoing and fun person he just couldn't keep up anymore! EPIC FAIL on his part, but that's ok i don't want or need to be with anyone who has to FAKE their way through life! He went to counciling a few times he walked as soon as he was told he was wrong ! he couldn't stand to hear what his faults are! he is perfect in his own little world!
Oct 29 - 11AM
Amiee
Amiee's picture

Fix himself??? It is as good

Fix himself??? It is as good as my ex husband aka antisocial personality disorder, telling me his counsleor discharged him because he's "all better". They never get well because they can't be honest with anyone especially themselves and they truly see nothing wrong with their behavior because it's all our fault because we are crazy. GRRR! POS's
Oct 29 - 12PM (Reply to #8)
needing2know
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Aimee

I admit, i am crazy lol but I am crazy in a good way lolI'm fun, loving , caring compassionate and yes I can laugh at my damn self lmao!
Oct 29 - 11AM
Sea
Sea's picture

N2K

Yeah sounds like he need time to fix his mask. That's the only way they have lived. They never thot they have any problem.
Oct 29 - 10AM
Layla
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When a PDI needs time to "fix himself".........

....he means, "I need time away from your watchful eye to go chase other supply down and I don't want you around to see it....when supply runs low or I can't successfully find any, I will be back with you, because you are just back up supply now". love~ Layla
Oct 29 - 10AM
Syren66 (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

It was him telling you that

It was him telling you that it's your fault...it's all your fault...he is broken because of you and now he has to dump you so he can repair the damage you did. His statement can also be abridged into the simple statement that "he's an asshole".
Oct 29 - 10AM (Reply to #2)
needing2know
needing2know's picture

he told me I wasn't happy the

he told me I wasn't happy the full 7 yrs, I told him I know he isn't happy and he didn't want to be in the relationship and if he had to say it was my fault if that's what made him feel better than so be it! He is a broken man I know I didn't do it to him, he told me I made him the happiest he had ever been in his life, then tells me I could have mad him happy lol what an idiot he had no idea about anything! Always contradicting his words lol
Oct 29 - 11AM (Reply to #3)
Syren66 (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

Yah, go forth and be happy

Yah, go forth and be happy fucker, because the way he has lived his life thus far has been such a success in the happiness department...*snort*
Oct 29 - 11AM (Reply to #4)
needing2know
needing2know's picture

he isn't happy, he hates to

he isn't happy, he hates to be alone, I love my alone time lolI have kids lol he would stay at my house when his kids are with their mom for the week because he hates being by himself, so he uses his business and his children, (he started couching again so he can be with them the week they are with mom) he is so unhappy he always tried to bring me down when i was always in a good mood, it's like he couldn't stand it! he hated that his kids and mine were so happy when they were all together, he always tried to bring them down too. I started calling him a grumpy ass old man lol he hated that, but hey if the shoe fits right? lol