feeling down lately!

I admit lately ive been feeling down and my thoughts were everywhere about narc. Its a waste i know. Its been 6 months NC so i guess i got far. Of course im feeling better than way before. Also my grandma passed away 2 weeks ago. I was so close to her, miss her so much. Im happy to say im trying to work on myself and am going to europe on monday next week for 2 weeks. Didnt go anywhere yet this year. I feel so bad for OW but atleast its not me again to suffer with narc.