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  5. EX NARC KNOCKED AT MY NEIGHBOURS WITH FLOWERS FOR ME !!

EX NARC KNOCKED AT MY NEIGHBOURS WITH FLOWERS FOR ME !!

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#1 Feb 7 - 10AM
booboo35
booboo35's picture

EX NARC KNOCKED AT MY NEIGHBOURS WITH FLOWERS FOR ME !!

My ex Narc who i have had NC with for 47 days, Has been in my neighbours this morning, Am fucking fuming, My neighbour knocked before, She said he went in and was crying saying that he loved me and didn't realise how much he missed me, (BULLSHIT!!) Am shaking with anger and i have just phoned my mum and she said i was stuttering, He was telling her all my private business, I told my neighbour a few home truths about Narc boy, That he was screwing my so called best friend behind my back, About his coke addiction and his drink problem, But what made me angry is how dare he try to get to me through my neighbours, I don't know weather to get the police as he has been warned previously by them not to come near me, God am shaking like a leaf!! Please girls can you give me some advice?? Thanks xxx

Feb 7 - 11PM
Amazed
Amazed's picture

Booboo35 they will do anything to save face

That is all this is about, you know it, I know it, they don't mean the flowers, they will go to your neighbors to show how desperate they are. He wants something, sex, money, a place to stay...has he done you wrong? Is he just trying to save face, buy himself some time so he can do this all over to you again?
Feb 7 - 9PM
booboo35
booboo35's picture

Thanks everyone for your

Thanks everyone for your advice, Its 3.30 am in the morning here and i have just woken up from another broken sleep because of Ex narc ARSE HOLE!! Yes am learning now that he just wants some supply like a leech if i gave supply by contacting him to tell him to stop harassing me, The leech would feed off that, Am still fuming as my sleep pattern is all up the wall again, Another thing i forgot to say is that when he went in to my neighbours with the flowers for me, he also left his phone number with on a note, I told my neighbour to throw it out AS I DID NOT WANT IT, So i am being strong. But am still very angry. I know he is just trying to throw me off balance and make me stressed, I really did think he would find some other sort of supply by now, But i think any woman that would put up with him needs her head testing, I really hope he goes away for good once he realizes he will be getting no attention or anything from me, These last 48 days now!! NC have made me think a little bit clearer and my mind is not as fuzzy as it was, Am still hurting still not strong and i still miss him, But i miss the illusion, I know if i ever let him back into my life i would just go back to square 1, And that am not prepared to do to myself or my family, Thanks Girls xxx

STAY STRONG!! XX

Feb 8 - 10AM (Reply to #10)
spinning
spinning's picture

Booboo, that's the beauty of NC

The 48 days were hard work but as you wrote you now "think a bit clearer" and the mind gets less fuzzy. Good for you for those 48 days. Each day makes you stronger and more able to deal with this lame hoover attempt. You proved to him that you are really done so he waited a good long time to test that theory. He tested it, you won. GREAT WORK!!!!! I want to forever lose the directions to "square 1." Like you, I will NEVER go back there. It's soooooo not worth it. I'm proud of you booboo. Stay NC and stay free. Sincerely (working on slowing down from) spinning

spinning

Feb 7 - 1PM
Briseis
Briseis's picture

First, take some deep

First, take some deep breaths! There is nothing TO do right now. It's all very emotional because it's the first time he's been stupid and transparent enough to do this. But it really is a pure predictable Narc maneuver. What it means to him and what it means to you are two different things. For him, he's run low on supply and he is trying to take you out of the garbage (where he threw you) to see if there is any supply stuck to the wrapping paper. Your emotional disgust and fear? Understandable. Just because he wants to take you out of the garbage (where he threw you) doesn't mean you are going to cooperate or anything. You are in perfect control here. Yeah it might not feel like it lol but you are :)
Feb 7 - 12PM
agnesmurphy17
agnesmurphy17's picture

Tell the Police

If they told him to stay away, then stay away! Condoning this contact by ignoring will cause the contact attempts to escalate. Don't be fooled. It took him 47 days to realize he missed you? Nope. After 47 days, life ain't goin' too good for him & he misses your support which enables him to live a comfy lifestyle. More comfy than in this moment. They can quickly forget. Mine called a girlfriend of mine with the similar -- I miss her weeping stuff. Fooled my girlfriend big time. The reality was -- after prohibiting me access to the house I co-owned for months, refusing to let me move my stuff out, -- he wanted me to move out ASAP because he wanted his new girlfriend to move in. But, I did not answer two of his e-mails & so he started calling my girlfriend because he loved me (no, he was trying to find me). Two days after this weeping call to my girlfriend, he sent me an e-mail saying: You stuff out by x date or it is in the trash. So much for loving me & wanting to be with me.
Feb 7 - 11AM
mystwoman
mystwoman's picture

I'd say make a written note

I'd say make a written note of it for future reference (date, time, what happened), and let the police know about the incident. He's already been warned to stay away from you, and now he's trying to find a way to get around this. When he's told No Contact, it MEANS No Contact with you. Rules always seem to apply everyone BUT the narc (in their minds). They're like snot. If allowed, they'll ooze wherever they're not supposed to go. Also, if it were me and anywhere near trash day, I'd take those flowers and place them prominently onto the garbage heap for pickup. Maybe if your xn drives down the street, he'll see them there. :) Hugs. ______________________________________________________ God sometimes removes a person from your life for your protection. Don't run after them.

______________________________________________________
God sometimes removes a person from your life for your protection. Don't run after them.

Feb 7 - 12PM (Reply to #6)
fooled no longer
fooled no longer's picture

Mystwoman / NARCATION

this is my fav Narc quote you wrote. "They're like snot. If allowed, they'll ooze wherever they're not supposed to go" too true !!! WHEN I HEAR FLOWERS AND NARC IN THE SAME SENTENCE, IT CAN ONLY MEAN TROUBLE>
Feb 7 - 11AM
ally2375
ally2375's picture

Booboo, honey

Oh, I'm so sorry your ex is such a nutjob. I understand why you're shaking. Honestly, this would scare me quite a lot. I don't know what to offer for advice here. Idealk has a point that contacting the police would be giving him attention, yet this is kinda stalker-y. I think you're in England? I have no idea how restraining orders work outside of the U.S., but you might consider looking into that. If he has already been warned by the police to stay away, you might also consider letting them know what he did today. You may not have to file an official report, but if the time comes that want to take action against him, at least there will be a record of the incident.
Feb 7 - 10AM
Hunter
Hunter's picture

Boo

I say do nothing, my friend had the same problem. Hers emailed her boss, she was fuming, I think if you get the police involved, you are giving him attention. If you are afraid of physical damage that's another story. Lay low and see what happens. Whatever you do,do not contact him. That's what he is waiting for. Go out for a walk to distract yourself!
Feb 7 - 11AM (Reply to #2)
booboo35
booboo35's picture

Am so angry, Has anyone else

Am so angry, Has anyone else had this happen to them? I ended the Relationship with the Narc, But while we were together he D&D me lots of times, He also was asking my neighbour if she knew if i was seeing anyone?? Why? He is stalking me now and i am scared now. I feel frightened and upset I am scared to even go out in case he jumps out from somewhere like when i went to get my sons birthday cake,He has hit me in the past i know that he would never hit me in public though but he will try to get to me somehow, My heads all messed up now, I think i am going to have to move out of Liverpool,

STAY STRONG!! XX

Feb 7 - 11AM (Reply to #3)
Hunter
Hunter's picture

Boo

They just do this, it's working isn't it? You may just send a quick note of warning. Keep it short and to the point. Do not answer his response! Personally I would just wait it out! His dipping his toe in the water. Idealk